Holiday mum keeps sending her son over to us repeatedly

[ItsPriya]

Currently on holiday - 2 week AI with husband and teenage daughter. Had a really busy year and was really looking forward to downtime and just recharging with the 3 of us.
On the second day was relaxing by the pool when a little boy about 4yo dropped his goggles near my lounger. Threw them into the pool for him, he threw them back and we had a little game of catch with them. Really sweet kid, thought no more of it.
Went to the buffet that night and the boy appeared at my feet as I was getting my food, started pulling at my arm, hanging off me whining "play with me" and asking me to go outside with him to play?!
My daughter came up to me and said she'd been passing his parents table and heard the mum say "he's whinging because hes tired, I told him to go play with that woman from earlier." Laughing and drinking while I'm trying to get my food and stop her kid from getting lost or hurt.
Went to sit down, said "I'm eating now, so go back to Mummy." Watched him go back over, his mum looked really annoyed, said something to him and he came back!
He said "my mum said I can sit with you until you're done then we can play."
Tried to eat but he was non stop, picking things up, touching things, whinging - not my child, why am I dealing with this?!
In the end DH walked him back over and firmly said we were trying to eat. Mum had the nerve to ask if our daughter had ever been a toddler.
Anyway, he harassed me at the entertainment that night to the point we left as I couldn't see his Mum so dropped him with the entertainment team. Makes DH very uncomfortable as he's very full on, climbing on our knees, wrapping his legs around us.
Breakfast this morning - he's actually waiting at the double doors and it was a repeat of the previous night. I actually suspect Mum is hiding from us.

What do I do?!

Ugh, disgusting POS man. Unfortunately, I think you need to be firm and tell this child you can't play with him. I know you feel deeply sorry for him (I think everyone reading your thread does), but your conscience is clear and you are not only being taken advantage of, but I would take what that man said to your husband as a veiled threat. You can absolutely guarantee they will try to blame you if anything happens to the lad. I'm glad you are going out tomorrow and won't have to put up with them. Fingers crossed for you that they are gone on Wednesday.

What does DH mean ?

@ItsPriya is it just me feel really bad for a child of this age, his parents doing this to him and not caring at all. Sounds really sad for him

What a disgusting thing to imply about your dh. I don't want to kick you while you're down but you sort of put him in that position, @ItsPriya.

If you see them tonight you're going to have to ignore that kid and send him away. Or do you want people accusing your husband of being a paedophile?

Take him to staff and report him as abandoned. do it every time. Poor kiddo

Throw the fucking goggles into the bar. Let them sort him out.

So sorry OP I absolutely hate when this happens. The parents always seem to act how this crowd have as well. Fingers and toes crossed for you that they're away home on Wednesday. Scumbags like this really annoy me. The poor little mite being left alone like that and him no more than a baby. It would break your heart and i totally understand why you don't want to be harsh with him.

One of the men in the group asked my DH why he was so interested in a little boy

OP this is precisely why you need to stop engaging. He could have any wound under his clothes, you were the last ones to play with him, what has your husband been playing with him for, on and on it goes. You need to stop feeling sorry for him and open your eyes to the absolute pile of shit this family could dump on you if they want to.

Speak to the Manager, tell him there is a boy who is quite often by himself, point him out if you can safely, ask to be seated somewhere else for meals, you need to be proactive here.

Please, please stop chucking goggles and ‘being kind’. You have paid money for a hotel with staff, this their job, to look after situations like this.

It’s a real shame for the little boy but you can’t moan about it for days and go
out of your way to avoid them then play with him again the minute he pops up, your just encouraging him.

Fully taking this on board, thank you.

You are right and I'm taking this on board. My husband is getting angry to the point it could turn physical and that could affect his job so I'm stepping back now. Just really hoping they're leaving on Weds.

This.

I get the goggles game, kids love a bit of diving for something when swimming.

Poor kid. Well done.

Everything is crossed for Wednesday!!

Well the McCanns and pals were all highly educated but they were still stupid at the end if the day!

@ItsPriya

I confess that I haven’t read all of the replies but I have read the updates you have made.

This is precisely one of the reasons we stopped going to hotels that allowed children, and in fact we have not been to a hotel at all for several years now, opting instead to rent a villa with a private pool. Not always as pricey as you might imagine, you get your own space, no-one bothering you and can do as you please. Properly relaxing.

Downside I guess if you like AI, then obviously in a villa you are self catering, but we buy food for breakfast and then get a snack for lunch and eat out at night. There is often entertainment in local restaurants and bars if you want that.

@ItsPriya Forget speaking to the lifeguards or bar staff you need to go to reception and speak to the manager.

This happens to dh on every holiday. He's in the pool with our kids and then gets tagger ons and can't shift them. He was oblivious the first two times until I gave out to him for throwing some young kid into the pool who couldn't swim ( to clarify they were all in the pool and dh was throwing them about - not from outside the pool). Dh was like don't be ridiculous, who lets their small child unsupervised in the deep end of the pool if they can't swim. HIS PARENTS OBVIOUSLY. I had to have a serious chat with dh that you can't just touch other kids or make assumptions about them like they're just extra nieces and nephews. He's better now but I sometimes get beckoned over to help him figure out a nice way of saying get your own adult to play this with you.

OP, I totally understand you. I have been in exactly the same situation and you have to have a heart of stone to ignore a small child who is clearly being neglected.

I hope you enjoy the rest of your holiday ❤️

And also, from the comment of one of the men in the boy’s group, if you do spend any more time with the boy, they’ll start making weird comments. What a horrible situation all round. I can’t stop thinking about the poor boy. OP, you sound wonderful.

Can I echo this you need to report this in writing to the hotel manager and deal with the manager. Explain that you have raised it with 2 members of staff and ask the hotel manager for their procedure in such situations where children are unsupervised at the pool. Alert the staff to the child, if anyone delivers him to staff you do it not your husband And keep well out of the area of supervising or appearing to especially your husband. You have no idea how these people may tell the story.
Making a comment like that to your DH is basically a threat.

I'm afraid I'm very impatient - I would have to tell the child I don't want to play with him, I am on holiday with my family and he needs to play with his own parents - every time

I agree.

I would be making it very clear to the hotel manager (as the family don’t care) that this child is in danger of drowning in the hotel pool and staff are not reacting appropriately.

What an awful thought. Even if I were at the pool, I would be resting with one eye open!

Not to mention that she is sending her child to be looked after by a family of strangers - you could be anyone!!!!! She thinks you're not dangerous because you're a woman (which is a fair assumption, really, although not foolproof), but for all she knows, the man in the family, your DH, could be a paedo! I'm sure he's not! But SHE doesn't know that!

I feel very sorry for that little boy. 😢

Oh my they sound truly vile!

What sort of halfwit sends a 4yo to play with random strangers?

I agree with others - do you have a travel rep you can speak to? and the hotel manager. It’s a safeguarding issue.

I’m not sure which country you’re in but European countries have roughly equivalent child safeguarding standards to the UK. If you’re in North Africa, or elsewhere, I’m not sure. They ought to take it seriously regardless. Poor lad. I could not have ignored him either.