Are you friends with your husband?

[UnorganisedMother]

I don't feel like I am. I try, however DH always says that he doesn't have much to talk about, and he doesn't really initiate time together; I get fed up of being the one to do so.
We get by OK, I just think it would better of we could have a bit more fun in our day to day lives, or even just an enjoyable chat.

I wanted to see whether this is usual really, or if I'm expecting more than I should. There is more to it than that, I just didn't want to type out a huge essay.
We've been together twenty years.

Same. I bet like me, you’ve tried and tried, put so much effort into the relationship and family life now you’ve given up. This thread has really highlighted what I’ve lacked.

Same here.

We aren’t friends. Pre marriage we would chat for hours about everything, do things together.

Post marriage, we only talk when essential - he wears headphones while gaming while at home, even eats while gaming, doesn’t sit with me to watch TV or talk to me, makes me feel terrible for interrupting him. And we have DC.

Gaming and devices and the addiction that some people get lead to the change in our relationship. Almost married 20yrs and people outside don’t have a clue with the front that’s put on outside of the house. I strongly suspect ND as it’s in his family and he is far worse in symptoms.

I’m quite lonely,

Yes, he’s my best friend and biggest supporter

Yes despite not having an awful lot in common! We have different tastes in music, film and tv and have separate friend groups. However we have the same sense of humour and are on the same intellectual level. Fundamentally we both like and are interested in the other. Been together nearly 30 years and I don’t see that changing for the next 30.

Yes mine is. Our relationship is different at the moment because we have two children under 4 so life is BUSY! It’s not bad but kids take over and we can passing ships sometimes. But when we do find the time to connect it’s like it was before kids. 15 together now and 5 married

Similar to me, we have a very strong mental connection, shared values, interests, he’s one of the smartest people I know. I do feel sometimes we would have been better off as just friends, I miss passion tbh. I think I thought that connection was important, I find it hard to connect with people, I have very few friends so I grabbed it while it was there. I wonder if I would have been happier single with DH as my best friend instead.

Communication is probably the most important part of our relationship.
We have been talking for over 45 years, he is my best friend and the person I trust more than anyone else, we never run out of things to say.
When we are not talking (reading, watching a movie etc) it is a comfortable silence.
Our kids have left home now and we are loving the empty nesting.
Perhaps you are not suited, if you feel a distance.

Yes we are best friends, and we have always worked as a team. After 37 years, the passion, love, friendship and trust we have for each other is still very much there.

He's my best friend. We were friends before we started a relationship and he's my very best friend now. I look forward to him getting off work. I look forward to his messages throughout the day. We have a lot in common and talk about our shared interests. We listen to each other talk about our personal interests. We go out together and listen to music together and dance together, we play games together. We still cuddle in the kitchen when cooking. We enjoy each others company through and through, whilst also enjoying our own time as well. We are also very sexually active and when we aren't, we still kiss and cuddle throughout the day when we are both home, so we still have the attraction and passion in the relationship.

I'm not saying we've never argued or anything, we've had some very challenging times bringing up two disabled children, and sleep deprivation, but we've always communicated and resolved any conflict easily.

I have other friends, like my girl friends, but he is truly my best friend on this earth and I'm so sorry to everyone who doesn't have that with their DH because forever is a long time to be unhappy.