Heed my warning (about crisps)

[Soubriquet]

I’m recovering from covid and I’ve been quite ill. I’ve actually gone an entire week without eating anything. I have fresubin to make up the calories but still.

Anhway, I really danced some pickled onion monster munch. So I got some. And I could taste it. Just.

So I had another. And another.

In the end, I had five packets. I felt good. I ate something!!

Then I realised my mistake. I have a sore now on my bottom left gum. Another one on the bottom right gum. And the skin has peeled away on my tongue.

Damn those crisps. Still have 4 left but I will eat those in moderation and scoff bags of cheesy balls instead.

I think that the most shocking thing about this post is that they still make Wheat Crunchies 😳😱

Whaaat? Why have I never heard of these??

I once ate a whole bag of Coop Chardonnay vinegar crisps. Jesus fucking christ, by the time I’d stopped shovelling them in long enough to realise what a disaster my mouth was in it was too late.

I have to really portion control myself with them now. They taste so good though!

Use corsodyl mouthwash (the red one) for the ulcers
swish it round your mouth and then ‘push’ it towards the sores-in the morning and again at bedtime after brushing your teeth
theyll be gone by the morning-its amazing stuff

Aaaahh! Now I see it! I've always assumed they were monster claws.

@Ostryga those coop crisps are heaven. actually all their crisps are the best. mmm crisps. mmm

That’s rough OP. One packet of those bad boys will take the roof of your mouth and top layer of tongue right off for a week.

💐

@Jb2182 I recently bought some Wheat Crunchies on the advice of a post I started on here about finding a snack similar to the tubes you get in Dairylea Dunkers.
My daughter licked one and said "no". I ate the rest - but I wouldn't buy again. I was quite disappointed in them 🤣

The best cure for monster munch burn is a few soothing Lindor balls and/or a tub of ice cream

Same in this house - I think the vinegar has been subbed for some sort of mouth eating acid!! They’re really sharp as well graze on the sore bits. Kinda nice though… if you know when to stop!

Wham Bars. Friend with a cash n carry card.

Agony.

They definitely can. I love the super strong salt and chardonnay white wine vinegar ones from Co-op. A whole pack of those will give you mild chemical burns on the inside of your mouth for a day or two after eating.

Wondering if there's a market for corsodyl flavour monster munch.

I have eaten large amounts of crisps in my time but no injuries. I accept the challenge.
I always thought monster munch were monster hands. My mind was blown that people thought they were feet never mind they're actually monsters.
My favourite flavour is the spicy.
My favourite crisps overall pringles. Sour cream.

I've got a mouthful of Frazzles ulcers. I feel your pain, OP. But it was totally worth it.

Lol x-post

@Needmorelego
They were rank back in the day and I imagine they're still rank now 😫

Respect ✊

I think the marketing teams at Colgate and Aquafresh are really missing a trick here. It’s all “plaque and total freshness” yadda yadda yet every good marketer knows you have to segment your customer base. Definitely a gap for paste sold as “crisp neutraliser” (or something).

On a very long and very boring car journey (5 hours) staying awake to entertain/pass things to the driver...

I consumed all of a HUGE SACK of off brand 'wotsits' - fuck knows what these things were but they were cheesier than wotsits, bright orange and the sack was huge, about three times the size of the usual big share bags of kettle chips...

My fingers were orange for days.

I felt so sick, I did not look at a cheesey wotsit style crisp for about 4 years.

But I just kept going that day, because every so often there'd be one with a huge chunk of cheesey flavouring stuck in the 'curl' of the snack, so intense it would burn a bit but soooooooo good so they kept me eating them...

I did also once over do the Skips - 20 pack multibag.. omg. I was off those for about 6 years and the smell still makes me a bit green tbh.

What an idea!!

Pickled onion Meanies ❤️😝

Wonder if these crisps eat away plaque. You'd save a fortune on the hygienist 😂😂

I'm intrigued about kiwis pain, do they strip skin too?

Puffft ?
They are Glorious.

Sadly definitely not allowed at the moment, I am low carbing.
But I shall live vicariously though you all eating my favourite S n V and Pickled Onion crisps :D

I'm working my way through a big bag of walkers max strong jalapeño & cheese crisps. They are so spicy I had to eat a Magnum half way through to soothe the burn. Nothing bleeding yet though.