Things that can fuck off

[Marianne1234]

Light hearted (sort of)

• Covid (obviously)
• late December birthdays
• Birthday parties the weekend before Christmas
• Sherry shortage in the local supermarket
• price stickers that don’t come off without leaving a mark on the item
• covid again for good measure and the fucking related anxiety about catching it this week and ruining Christmas

Gaaaaah

People who stop at bottom of escalators or outside doors.

People on trains not wearing masks.

Parents who post Facebook pics of the dozens of presents they have bought for their kids Christmas/birthdays.

Coathangers

Uber Eats drivers that can't follow delivery instructions. Then blame the orderer for them not being able to follow instructions.

People who stop at bottom of escalators or outside doors oh absolutely this, it does my head in!

Our FPTP system which gives political parties “huge majorities” with 35%-40% of the vote.

People who drive over the speed limit around residential areas. Slow the fuck down you imbecile.

Children coming down with chicken pox on 18th Dec when I have the last 3 days of school and nursery for myself to finish my wrapping and food prep.

In laws for Xmas.

My husband!

My constant stiff, achy feet and ankles every time I get up
The excess stone and a half I gained this year
My friend who lost 3 stone and happily sashays her slinky figure around my kitchen when she comes for coffee
My friend who has to do absolutely everything Christmas related with her children and obsessively posts a hundred pictures of each event. If I see one more photo of her in a covid secure meeting with yet another local Santa I will cry
Face masks
Constantly changing Christmas plans

• waiting for deliveries can fuck off

Having bought every well in advance yet still waiting for delivery and I'm a stressy person so this sends my anxiety through the roof this close to Xmas.

There are things I bought in October that still haven't bloody shown up but I just get the 'mail is moving slow please be patient' message when asking where things are. The thing is the mail isn't slow as something I order come through in only a day or two but others just haven't shown up at all.

Agree with PP, coat hangers.
Tangled cables
Fake nespresso capsules that don’t work
CF bidders on marketplace, Vinted etc making really really low offers
Lockdowns
Rude cyclists (without lights at night grrrr)

Winter wonderland. Fucking hate it; busy, obnoxious, cold and spent £200 to listen to my kids whinge.

Primark jeans. I am usually a size 10/12 and I bought a 10. They go nowhere near me

My ex husband can take his stupid beard and fuck RIGHT off!!! Can I get an amen!!!!!!!

Currently have covid so it can fuck right off. Upside though is my isolation finishes one minute to midnight Christmas Eve!

My husband. Dickhead.

COVID meaning holiday plans are cancelled. Just. Fuck. Off. Now.

My stepdaughter
My stepdaughter
My stepdaughter
And my stepdaughter.

Kevin, my left kidney and its bloody 3mm stone and fluid, also Keith, my right kidney and its 7mm stone. Have had stones for the past few years so under hospital, but Kevin's aching a bit these past few days.

@didyouscoredarling yes and I think this is only a recent thing too

Flashing Christmas lights

[quote MissBridgetJones]@Fuckingfuckssake

If this works I will hunt you down and take you for a massive drink![/quote]
I'll send you my address

Skinandbones sounds fucking shit but i love your kidneys names.

The stupid itchy scar from gallbladder surgery. Yes it's better than still having to deal with gallstones and yes I know it wont heal properly until I stop fussing with it, but It Itches. Worse than eczema. I keep scratching at it without even realising. Sigh, it's not going to be a small, faint scar.

Men

Fucking Hermes