Dementors Begone!

[ThatLibraryMiss]

Take your shaming and your doom and gloom somewhere else.

What happens if your previously sensible dh develops dementor symptoms? Dh ominously muttering that even if schools reopen ours should remain at home anyway. What the hell!?

Why have they not mentioned that obviously the entire sorting office and the poor local postie have since carked it from touching the infected card

In laws were dementors already as in after spending go time with them you are a flat sad version of your previously cheerful self. They are very perky atm and regale is with their neighbours transgressions whilst strictly adhering to the only out for an hour made up non rule.

@PinkSparklyPussyCat

That is just unbelievable! Dementors paradise. Reminds me of a a creepy kids book. I wonder if they’ll modify kids nursery rhymes:

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Then HE DIED because sitting on walls spread covid and people DIE.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water
Then they DIED because they weren’t two metres apart and it was completely unnecessary for both of them to go up the hill

Little miss muffit sat on a tuffet eating her curds and whey
Along came a spider and sat down beside her but she was already DEAD because curds and whey aren’t essential shopping items!

😂 it's so mad! It reminded me that for bingo we should have do you KNOW how long the virus survives on surfaces type thing.

Though my all time favourite is washing vegetables in milton

Oh.. and I've just seen "people will not starve if they lose their jobs"

Those nursery rhymes

Mascotte I also had a poster who replied to me saying “I’ll die rather be homeless” trying to tell me that homelessness and death were not linked.

@LilacTree1 these people are nuts!!

"people will not starve if they lose their jobs"

You couldnt make it up could you?

I think it should be added to the nationl curriculum in the future
"How Covid turned the Uk into a bunch of gibbering fools in 2020"

Exam Questions:
How many 'fake rules' can you name.
How many stupid phrases, sound bites can you list.
Give examples of hysterical social media posting.
Discuss how sitting on a bench was considered to lead to thousands of deaths and argue against the theory.
Explain the origins of the 'Thursday Night Clapping' we still have today in 2039....(clue: nobody can remember so make something up)

It's just bizarre. The post also contains "I despair"'and "fucking selfish " with regard to people who want lockdown lifted so DCs can see friends/they're demented/they want to see family

I actually think it will be studied. It's like government sponsored mass hysteria

Oh, going to school is selfish too

Mascotte when I was thinking through the practicalities of bleaching everything that came in the door (in bemusement) Milton was the only thing I could think of that would work for vegetables.

This was an entirely academic exercise, we eat stuff straight out of the packet the minute it comes home from the shop.

It will hopefully be studied as an exercise in mass hysteria

Makes me wanto to blow a vuvuzela through their letterboxes

I think that is a very tempting proposition. Do it!

I have found my people here. Love the bingo card. 🤣

I sat on a park bench and ate a packet of crisps the other day, and played on my phone for a few minutes. I did wonder if a dementor would swoop and want me shit it arrested even though I was in a deserted area.

A friend of my DD's went for a walk locally to where she lives and happened to see (from a good distance) a couple she knew. They kept more than social distancing apart but within five minutes were approached by the local police, who said they had been called because this constituted a social gathering.

I remember the threads back at the start of lockdown where the dementors swooped on those of us planning to cook dinner outdoors on the barbie as the weather was lovely. Shock horror, we were planning on having wine with that meal too!!! And we had dared to buy Easter eggs for our families. The dementors had a brilliant time with us. 😂

It has got to the point now where I wait for the arrival of the dementors whenever I see a thread about someone doing something nice.

I meant shot at and arrested, by the way. 🤣

That card 😂😂

I'm pregnant and walk to waitrose three times a week (to relieve boredom, get snacks and to try and encourage labour). I also stopped to look at the sun yesterday and enjoyed it's warmth.

I'm happy to find my fellow "hate the NHS and wants to kill all the nurses" tribe.

💓

This thread is 👌

Was that message about the Grandpa suggesting you can send the virus through the post on a birthday card, seeing as she never saw him in the end? Would have thought that would be very unlikely. It's all so dramatic isn't it!

It will hopefully be studied as an exercise in mass hysteria

Yes...they have that nudge unit...don't they... the power of hysteria and fear.

Another funnny thing is the papers have now started doing article about 'getting your vitamin d' by getting out in the sun, with picture of people on benches and sunbathing, seemingly oblivious to similar shots being used to shame people very recently

Oh, that was so last week, perhaps! We have never had the benches taped up here thankfully..

Re the mass hysteria thing, it just really reminds me of the atmosphere post-9/11 - the anxiety about flying & fear of Muslims & people seriously thinking that bombing the shit out of far away countries would somehow make them "safer" sat there on their sofas in Nantwich. I'm not saying that the virus isn't serious and that society needs to respond, just that so many people seem to have completely lost the ability to risk assess? Its definitely getting calmee though