Dementors can dement but we'll keep it positive here

[hobnobsaremyfavourite]

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Dementor free zone

Second wave, TheLibrary, you're missing Second Wave aka Captain Tripps (after the 99% fatal superflu in The Stand). Death is a certaintly. And masks. You must all wear masks any time you go outside, even if you live on the island of Iona or rural Mull and there are more sheep than people around. 'Non-essential'. 'Daily exercise not to exceed 1 hour'.

Thanks Mascotte, I've added them plus Bring in the Army.

Might pop onto a dementor thread and shout HOUSE!

Can I come in please to calm down? I've properly lost my shit to a dementor and feel the need to hide in a safes pace, with curly wurlies.

If we’re playing bingo I’m pleased to see the dementors still identifying themselves immediately with liberal use of CAPITALS. We are all going to DIE.

And my particular pet hate, patronising rhetorical
questions, most often: What part of that is so difficult to understand?

Can I add ‘holiday? you will be lucky’ (said in obligatory Demenetor tone

I live in a country where kindergartens started back 2 1/2 weeks ago and grades 1-4 primary schools 1 1/2 weeks ago. Hairdressers and other shops started opening up at the same time. So far the infection rate has not gone up at all. There have been the odd pocket of infection that has led to localised quarantine, but so far so good. I think a lot of people here though it was too soon when they announced opening up, but so far it seems like it was the right thing to do. I am not unoptimistic that the same will happen in the UK when the country starts to come out of lockdown.

We should also add “muster” and “blood on their hands” to bingo

I’ve just seen on the easing lockdown on Monday thread someone stating that it would be murder 🙄

and “worst death toll in Europe”

Sorry, posted to soon

But constantly banging on about having the worst death toll in Europe without taking into account different sized populations, population density, differences in recording deaths, etc.

We do not have the worst death per million of population rate

Sprinter was just about to add ‘MURDER’ but you beat me to it. This one annoys me on two fronts 1) it’s awful inflammatory language and could cause a lot of distress to a vulnerable person 2) ITS NOT MURDER!!!

I saw a thread yesterday afternoon stating we now have the worst death toll in Europe

I swear some dementor had been sitting there all afternoon waiting for the numbers to be announced.

Muster in my first post should have said “murder”. Bloody autocorrect on my phone. 🤦‍♀️

Oh, I forgot "If it saves one life it will have be worth me being confined to one room homeschooling my five dcs for YEARS!"

Can we add 2021? Usually preceded by no holidays abroad until 2021 or schools not opening until January 2021.

So now we have:
Stay the fuck at home
Which part of … don’t you understand?
Italy
Spain
People will die
Relative works for NHS
I am shielding so you can't go out
No end in sight
Won’t go to work until vaccine available
You’re selfish
Heatwave lockdown
Post-lockdown second wave
Bring in the Army
Lockdown should have been a tougher from the start
This isn't lockdown
Anne Frank
Holiday? Not until 2024!
Blood on their/your hands
Easing lockdown would be murder
Worst death toll in Europe
Is going … more important than PEOPLE'S LIVES?!
Masks are essential when leaving house
No non-essential activities
Daily exercise not to exceed 1 hour
If it saves one life it will have been worth …

Lovely, keep them coming!

My particular bugbear at the moment is

"Try telling that to those who have lost loved one's then"...usually in response to a post about ending lock down.

Well this particular person who has lost a loved one can't wait for it all to be lifted enough for me to go back to work.

Peoples lives are worth more than the economy (usually said by someone who doesn’t have to worry about the impact of the economy!)

My bugbear today is people who are ‘shielding’ and tell everyone about it despite not having the official letter or being on the list of conditions. They’ve decided they are Very Sick And Special and have to tell us all about how scary it is. And now lockdown may be relaxed a tiny bit, they still won’t so much as sniff the air from the window as they are Shielders.

In fact if I started a t shirt line that says ‘I’m a shielder’ and on the back it says ‘stay away or you’ll be a murderer!’ Do you I’d make some dolla?

Have we added the "Christmas will be cancelled and a good thing too!!!" Dementor-Grinch hybrid yet? I spotted one in the wild only two days ago.

My guess is a lot of people will drop the 'Its evil to consider the economy' line the fecking second their own mortgage holidays end.

@somewhereeast
I’m not so sure, the husbands of these dementors are in my mind squirreled away in a home office working 12 hour days in a finance related job which keeps the money rolling in and allows the dementor in question to fully focus on her task

Ah yes the fake shielders, probably told they might have had asthma in 1986 and now think they are as vulnerable as someone who should actually be in that category. I bet some of these people are taking up valuable food delivery slots from actual vulnerable people because they think they are more important, it’s like shielding top trumps.

New normal - add this one. The Dementors circulate memes like 'When the dust settles, we will realise how very little we need, how much we actually have, blah blah blah'. You'd have to have been a real dunce not to have realised this already, but Dementors use it to shame and bring up their moral superiority. Well, I like vaping, drinking too much at weekends, smoking weed on occasion, buying shit from Primark, eating out, driving for pleasure and travelling and this won't change that.

Have we already had the “I don’t care if you have to walk 10 miles to the shops with triplets in a sling, you’re murdering shielders by having your shopping delivered”?