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AIBU?

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Original poster

Guy with teeth

141 replies

sadconfusedembarassed · 26/05/2023 11:13

I met a man at a session for one of my hobbies (outing as it's quite niche so can't mention). He's a really funny and smart guy and I really enjoy chatting with him etc. He's also really good looking/healthy/fit and a few years older than me but I have an embarrassing question that is making me feel quite shallow as well. I don't think I am necessarily shallow and never thought this type of stuff would bother me but I really have an issue with his teeth. I think he might be a smoker and I haven't asked and he definitely has 'bad' teeth and I don't really want to describe it. The problem is that I really like him and his personality and I think he might have a little crush on me (he's quite popular there). So what should I do? How can I tell him to go see a dentist or something along that line, is that even acceptable?? AIBU to even like him?? Please help me, I need some advice from the wise MN. I am definitely name changing after this post!

OP posts:
DitherDother · 26/05/2023 12:03

I think if you don't want to date him because of his teeth either you don't really like him that much or you're destined to be single for a long time.

Imagine if he told you he'd like you if only you got your nose/hair/clothes fixed.

Original poster
sadconfusedembarassed · 26/05/2023 12:05

Ah okay yeah this is why I posted on here to try and understand more thank you @Pepsipepsi @PinkFootstool

OP posts:
WoofWoofBeachLife · 26/05/2023 12:05

queenMab99 · 26/05/2023 11:22

He has teeth? That's a bonus.

Belly laughing 😂😂😂😂😂

Original poster
sadconfusedembarassed · 26/05/2023 12:07

😂😂😂😂😂

OP posts:
WoofWoofBeachLife · 26/05/2023 12:12

I do get where you are coming from OP. Does his breath smell if there's obvious decay? Dentists are so expensive. My teeth are stained due to medication and black coffee and I have ordered moulds for whitening. If anyone said anything to me I think I would cry and be so ashamed my teeth were stained. I don't smile in photos xx

Shhhquirrel · 26/05/2023 12:14

sadconfusedembarassed · 26/05/2023 11:18

No, I would just leave him alone and I have but I think he really likes me as he always waits for me afterwards and I wouldn't mind dating him. That's the only reason I asked. Can someone give me a little advice without telling me to leave him alone because I can already think and decide that?

because I can already think and decide that?

Maybe try expanding your thinking capabilities regarding what is socially acceptable.

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:14

OP, what are your own teeth like?

I wonder if you have any flaws that he might have noticed in passing: being a bit podgy, poor skin, bad hair, lack of intellectual prowess…?

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:15

Shhhquirrel · 26/05/2023 12:14

because I can already think and decide that?

Maybe try expanding your thinking capabilities regarding what is socially acceptable.

Show quote history

Exactement.

ReliantRobyn · 26/05/2023 12:15

threecupsofteaminimum · 26/05/2023 11:22

I couldn't date a man with bad teeth, sorry. Deal breaker, I have v high standards and have no plans to ever get into another relationship though!

Sounds more like you are the problem here !

queenMab99 · 26/05/2023 12:18

He may be hanging on to his unattractive teeth in order to ward off scheming females with designs on him. I leave my hair grey and wear crocs to put off the men I meet walking my dog.

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:27

Maybe you could show him this classy image…

Guy with teeth
Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:33

CountessBathorysBeautySecrets · 26/05/2023 11:39

I don't think anyone will think you shallow for having 'must have teeth' as a prerequisite in a date!

Show quote history

Haha

Season 1 Lol GIF by NBC
Original poster
sadconfusedembarassed · 26/05/2023 12:34

I understand why people are upset and trying to throw 'insults' here and that's fine but it's not really helpful other than making me understand I can never approach this subject with strangers or partners. I was only looking for some insights on something I didn't understand (my lack of social skills and inability to give up I suppose). I would never tell him anything about his features when he comes to talk to me so please chill and don't take it personally. I don't usually care for looks it's just this one thing that has bothered me. Honestly, I don't know if it's because I am mildly shallow or it just bothered me or I want my partner to have okay teeth. Also, don't worry I will delete this thread later as it seems too triggering for some. By the way there were some useful responses so thank you for that 😅

OP posts:
YouProbablyWontLikeTheAnswer · 26/05/2023 12:35

TomatoSandwiches · 26/05/2023 11:24

Can you imagine him waiting for you.at the end of the evening and saying,

" you know sadconfusedembarrassed I've really enjoyed getting to know you, I like your company and would totally consider dating you, but only if you sorted out that bump on your nose. It's the only thing that keeps putting me off so I thought I'd let you know and put the ball in your court. "

this

GalileoHumpkins · 26/05/2023 12:38

What a shame your extremely outing niche hobby isn't dentistry for total dummies.

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:41

Triggering? Unlikely. People are just bemused by your attitude and treating you accordingly.

Care to post a photograph of yourself…?
Thought not.

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:44

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:41

Triggering? Unlikely. People are just bemused by your attitude and treating you accordingly.

Care to post a photograph of yourself…?
Thought not.

This?

Guy with teeth
Gettingbysomehow · 26/05/2023 12:46

So you'd all be happy dating a man with horrendous teeth and stinking breath then? I think you are liars.

Christmascracker0 · 26/05/2023 12:48

Everyone has their preferences in dating, so fair enough if you don’t like bad teeth but you can’t tell him that!

Also as I’ve got older I’ve found I need to compromise on some of my preferences as the dating pool gets smaller and smaller so I can’t be too choosy 🤣

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:48

I don’t dare because I’m already married. My husband is tall, dark, handsome, clever, decent - oh and he has nice fangs.

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:49

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:48

I don’t dare because I’m already married. My husband is tall, dark, handsome, clever, decent - oh and he has nice fangs.

…date

Original poster
sadconfusedembarassed · 26/05/2023 12:49

Do you find that picture ugly? Thought you didn't care about teeth 😅

OP posts:
Original poster
sadconfusedembarassed · 26/05/2023 12:51

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:49

…date

Show quote history

Okay good for you, no one asked?

OP posts:
Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:51

I’m sharing. 🙄

Pringles87 · 26/05/2023 12:52

Wow - as someone with crooked teeth considering going back into the dating world - this post has made me want to stay inside my house and not even try again 🫠 some people can’t help how their teeth look - my parents never got me a brace when I was younger and I have a whole jaw misalignment and then I’ve had terrible health the last 2 years which basically ruined the enamel on them and really deteriorated the condition of them. I have only now got into a position where I can afford to get them fixed by some chance inheritance that I was left, but not everyone can afford that with the prices nowadays. He will find someone who accepts him for who he is and how he looks - it’s just not going to be you OP!