Roll up, Ladies and Gentlecreatures, the Bluestocking has been redecorated

[DeanElderberry]

Here for your delight and delectation is the hostelry by, for, and about wise, intelligent, creative and kind women, their assorted avatars including (but not limited to) a remarkable beetle, an astute android, a wise cake, and an assembly of companion creatures and animal assistants.

Food and drink available in abundance, all with remarkable non-damaging qualities.

Males may congregate in the nearby Staunch Ally and sometimes visit the stableyard to view outdoor performances by the gerbil waitstaff (who need to be distracted after the moment after that terrible 'misunderstanding' about the meaning of safe sex).

last thread here if you need to know why the Quokkas need some extra cuddles, and why the Cabybaras are being particularly efficient just now

www.mumsnet.com/talk/womens_rights/5273255-the-bluestocking-all-gerbils-welcome-must-have-own-frou-frou-skirt?

Somewhat unnerving that the clipped version of the pic says 'MEN'S PUB'!

Hope you manage to extricate yourself from the sofa.

Pic 1 is Murph as a woman; pix 2 & 3 are what AI thinks a murph meister is. So, yet another form of rodent?

My AI thinks a @Murfmeister is a man. And a very manly man at that!

So I added the word female...

Why does Co Pilot hate me, is it because of my brief dalliance with Designer?

Gemini thought a Murfmeister was a person, which it won't do unless I pay. Sorry Murf... And welcome!

so AI reckons 'female' is big tits, no mouth so can't speak and

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enormous pointy ears and at least one antler?

god be with the days when a quick peep in ones underwear was enough if in doubt.

Do not repeat do not point the AI at anyone's underwear.

@DeanElderberry wrote
Anyhow, since we do have visiting ships, and you never know what might be brought ashore, or by whom, should we designate on of the snugs especially for smugglers the gentlemen traders?

Hmm… watch the wall my darling when the gentlemenfolk go by? We’ll need a signal which tells us to keep away from that snug. Something attached to the doorknob? (I vaguely remember this being a code in women’s colleges at some time perhaps, but what it was I don’t know. Between the days of compulsory chaperones and overnight guests being allowed.)

When they aren't around, the quokkas, or the dogs, or Rosy, or anyone in need of a small cosy space to get together could use it. That should make them feel validated and comfortable and rather pleased with life.

What a good idea. They can get unsettled after a move.

Welcome, @Murfmeister , from someone lurking in the corner of a Snug.

I think your AI has rodents on the brain... Which is another image one probably shouldn't request!

I've been thinking that the gerbils are getting a little slack and need an upskilling programme.

It will give them a sense of purpose and pride, and improve morale. What do they need? Inisital suggestions -

Emergency response including first aid and the proper use of fire extinguishers. PROPER use.

Manual handling - bend those knees.

Table service including correct cutlery, glasses, china.

Getting the food, tea and coffee and cocktail ingredients right, how long oh lord how long.

How to fold the napkins into amusing and appropriate shapes.

Reaction to dangerous AI breakouts - superfluous legs, fires lit under tables, impalement, weird fingers, men.

When not to sing.

What not to sing.

Courtesy, cleanliness and co-operation.

what else?

I gave them a lecture on safe sex. They get so easily distracted, you need lots of bells and whistles to keep them attentive or you're likely to be wasting your time.

Definitely a food hygiene course.

The misunderstanding about safe sex should inform our approach to gerbil pedagogy. Assume very short attention spans. Bells and whistles - hmm, maybe work songs or shanties?

Food hygiene yes.

Any hygiene.

And not one of those round the table 'tell us one special thing about yourselves' sessions because they would never ever stop.

Welcome to the Bluestocking, Murfmeister, you'd be very welcome even if you were not as uber-cute as this. But I'm afraid this is the mental image you're stuck with now
Love the hat and scarf, and love how the little rodent is clearly trying to learn how to be uber-cute by copying your gestures. Awwwww.

BTW a bit of a head-up re beverages: if that is what you really really enjoy drinking😑sláinte, but you should know that Bluestocking hot chocolate with extra cream, marshmallows, sprinkles - e v e r y thing, in short - magically has no calories, sugar or fat but it has all the mmmmmm taste.
And Bluestocking's finest whiskeys, G&Ts, wines, cocktails etc etc magically have all the effects of alcohol - up to but not including ruining your mascara and telling everybody that they are all your one and only best friend in the whole world - but none of the aftereffects.

But if lemon and ginger tea is what Modom wants, that's what the gerbils [recently retrained by Deano] will bring Modom.

And they are now too well trained to say what a barman in a busy pub in rural Ireland said, without raising his eyes from the pint he was pulling, to a customer who complained that the hadn't put a slice of lemon in the G&T -
'Erra, man, would oo fuck off out of that and lave way for a rale drinker'

Those were the days when men were men and customer service was yet to be invented😄

Hahah man version is big beard and big hands. Woman version is big boobs and big ears

Gerbil pedagogy sounds very much like my standard pedagogy. I don't employ shanties but I am considering it! I suspect anything that works for your average ADHD teenager would be equally appropriate for the gerbils. Regular movement breaks, even better if they're purposeful. Lots of student-led learning. Short bite size learning. Repetition ad nauseam when they ask a question you literally just answered. Bite tongue, think zen thoughts, and lots of hot chocolate.

You know your wish is always my command, dear Magpie...

Some of those are things of nightmare! Although the fourth would make a great embroidery design.

I suspect I was an ADHD teenager. I (sort of) got by with lots of doodling, that as I got older turned into lots of note-taking. And some doodling.

They can get very enthusiastic if you catch their attention. A little too enthusiastic. The safe sex talk...I had to stop them from giving live demonstrations. Which led nicely into a little derail about boundaries.

I've never had to deal with live demonstrations, but I have learnt things about students that they really shouldn't have said out loud! Many of them have no filter.

a little derail about boundaries

yes, and maybe discourage them from singing their sex shanties within earshot of the customers. Or the capybaras, such genteel and decorous animals.

But napkin folding! what could possibly go wrong with that?

They are still getting their pills regularly aren't they?

I always felt there was something potentially rather rude about the "candle fan" napkin fold, @DeanElderberry

I hope the pills didn't get left behind in the move!