Toilets for all

[marniedes]

Was out for some dinner and drinks last night went to use the toilets and this is what they were. Most toilet seats were up and when I went to wash my hands there was a guy washing his who looked as uncomfortable as I felt! Why why why are places doing this!

You realise trans women don't generally act like this?

This is basically what we do in women's toilets. We go into the cubicle, lock the door, do our business, make sure we haven't made a mess, get dressed, open the door, wash our hands, and get out of there as quickly as possible.

Not quite sure why this is terribly bad behavior.

Did all the cubicles have sanpro bins as required in single sex women’s loos OP?

(to be honest, after reading what some transwomen do with used sanitary products, I’m not sure I’d want to use said bin, but that’s by the by)

@Skyliner001

Very happy to share a toilet with women and trans women. Not happy to share a toilet with cismen.

Are you bigoted against cismen? Why?

From before lockdown.

Normal toilets, door in then cubicles with gaps under and at top.

Came out to bloke washing hands who looked less than happy to see me.

Not comfortable for me at all. I won't go there again.

For the restaurants it's a no brainer. Change one set of bogs to mixed sex, space freed up for more seating.

Trans women are women. We just look a bit different from other women, OK? Maybe our appearance grosses you out a bit, and I'm sorry it does. We just want to get along with our live like any other woman. We aren't a threat or an enemy to you.

Why would your appearance gross anyone out?

That's a really strange comment. Can you elaborate?

I'd also be interested to know how, when anyone can claim a trans identity and it has to be accepted, women are too be safeguarded from the very large minority of men who are creepy as all fuck.

@MiladyRenata

Trans women are women. We just look a bit different from other women, OK? Maybe our appearance grosses you out a bit, and I'm sorry it does. We just want to get along with our live like any other woman. We aren't a threat or an enemy to you.

This wasn't about trans women

Apparently everything is about transwomen, and if it’s not it soon will be 🙄

Also trans women are women - do you want to be sharing a toilet with a man?

Trans women are women. We just look a bit different from other women, OK?

Funny how you had to come along and make the thread about transwomen, not everything is about you. But whilst you're on the subject do clarify exactly how transwomen are women. Because you don't "look different" to other women, you are different.

@JanMeyer

Trans women are women. We just look a bit different from other women, OK?

Funny how you had to come along and make the thread about transwomen, not everything is about you. But whilst you're on the subject do clarify exactly how transwomen are women. Because you don't "look different" to other women, you are different.

Sorry what? I was using it an example as in if trans women are women it's not an issue

My post was meant for Milady, not for you.

OP - did all the cubicles have sanpro bins as required in single sex women’s loos?

This is ridiculous. Aside from the fact how we as adults feel, no teenage girl should have to share a loo with a grown male. Same for teenage boys sharing a loo with grown women. Highly uncomfortable for all. What about little children seeing the man using the loo with the door open as a PP mentioned?

I know men don’t mind weeing in public, but women need privacy.

Trans women should pee safely but by definition, they're not female. Women cannot be trans women.

I hate mixed sex toilets. The only advantage of the sinks being outside the toilets is you can see how many men don't wash their hands. There was a trendy bar in my town when I was at uni that had this set up. I NEVER ate bar peanuts again after using those toilets. I also tried to never go to the loo at that bar, if I had to go to it (friends meeting there) because it felt so unsafe. The bar was not a student bar, was in a business area of town and had wealthy clientele. Wasn't a dive in any way. But it never felt safe using the loos - and to be fair, the men I saw in there weren't looking comfortable either.

Save for the bloke peeing with the door wide open behind him
This is so it!
The place can provide fully lockable floor to ceiling individual cubicles, even the most beautifully fragranced air freshener etc, but at the end of the day, men still piss on your seat and leave the door wide open, so no.

I note that as usual "all" excludes the less able.

Please leave a review online mentioning this so other women can read and avoid if they desire.

Skyliner001
Very happy to share a toilet with women and trans women. Not happy to share a toilet with cismen.
Are you bigoted against cismen? Why?

---

I'm pretty sure that men can tolerate the odd bit of prejudice against their toilet habits. You must be a man if you are concerned about that. Check your privilege.

@JanMeyer

Trans women are women. We just look a bit different from other women, OK?

Funny how you had to come along and make the thread about transwomen, not everything is about you. But whilst you're on the subject do clarify exactly how transwomen are women. Because you don't "look different" to other women, you are different.

This is a beyond rich comment. Are you having a laugh? There are many threads on mumsnet that get turned into a thread about trans-women by gender critical posters. NOT by transwomem. Indeed there is one currently about a woman who was asked to move on an aeroplane which has been derailed. 🙄🙄

@ItsLateHumpty

Apparently everything is about transwomen, and if it’s not it soon will be 🙄

It is if you're a GC poster, yes.

Indeed there is one currently about a woman who was asked to move on an aeroplane which has been derailed.

It was not derailed at all. There were one or two comments and they raised an interesting question. A hypothetical one in that particular instance, but one that will presumably rear it's head at some stage.

Sky you might have noticed it wasn't a GC poster who made this about TW.

Trans women are women. We just look a bit different from other women, OK?

This is an ideological position, which obviously you'll appreciate not everyone will join you in. I for example don't expect to inform people that there is only one true God and have everyone affirm that they convert to my personal faith. TW are male, many women will always perceive them as male, and the facts are that mixed sex provisions are not to the benefit of people born female. Removing single sex provisions for people born female to better suit the needs of those born male is also not in the interests or even wanted by people born female, which makes the whole thing fundamentally sexist.

The whole 'gross' comment baffles me, it's not a phrase I'm familiar with. But it has to do with the mixed sex aspect and the injustice and immorality of exclusion of females who cannot join this ideological view, not with anyone's appearance.

Trans women are women. We just look a bit different from other women, OK?

Renata, I could keep insisting I am a Vogue front-cover model, but I doubt if I would convince anyone, no matter how often I repeated it.

From my own experience, I do not feel safe in an enclosed indoor space with a male-bodied person. That is not a phobia but a rational fear backed by evidence. Transwomen commit sexual offences at the same rate as non-trans men.

I note that as usual "all" excludes the less able.

Sadly true, SerendipityJane.