Toilets for all

[marniedes]

Was out for some dinner and drinks last night went to use the toilets and this is what they were. Most toilet seats were up and when I went to wash my hands there was a guy washing his who looked as uncomfortable as I felt! Why why why are places doing this!

I don't want to share public toilets with any adult males no matter how they identify, no explanation needed. I wouldn't give them my custom.

Taking care not to say anything screen-shootable or which might mark me for deletion (HINT)...

I would not be comfortable with that set-up. This is not toilets for all. It is able-bodied toilets that might suit men, but which will not suit women.

I'd write to them and complain and then vote with your feet.

I'm pretty sure it was a trans women who derailed the thread, wasn't it?

Ugh i would hate that. Most men do too. 2 sexes have 2 different biologucal set ups and requirements and we all deserve privacy fir that.

Men lose the ease and speed of the urinals and have to join the queue.

And women lose valuable cubicals and have to wait twice as long as before.

Penises whoever they are attached to no matter how they identify do not belong in toilets alongside those who don't have them.

I'd be so tempted to take a load of women friends in there when men are in there and loudly ask for a tampon and then have a discussion about sanitary pads. I'd love to see what the men think of unisex loos then.

This loo thing is so precious.

No one segregates loos at home (and most have builders, cleaners, window cleaners etc using them quite happily).

It is rare staff toilets in a small business are segregated, either, and most staff toilets in schools have been unisex forever.

And very few object to toilet cleaners of either sex.

Why would I care if anyone chatted about tampons?!

And, in public places, businesses, Loos should be cleaned and sanitised regularly, so blame the business if they are foul.

I get a lot of the women’s rights stuff about the TRA lobby but loos...major storm in a tea cup.

I was in Brighton last week with my family

We went to a great bar on the front and when I popped to the loo there were 3 cubicles (Doors werent great but I can’t remember why i thought that) and It was only when i came out to wash my hands and a bloke was there that i realised it was multi sex

Im not keen At all but ive personally only seen it in clubs and bars...but as someone said upthread as long as you know and can vote with your feet its better that designated Ladies loos becoming multi sex while the gents remains men only

Home toilets being multi sex is the stupidest argument ever

Very happy to share a toilet with women and trans women. Not happy to share a toilet with cismen

How do you distinguish a transwoman from a man?

We just want to get along with our live like any other woman. We aren't a threat or an enemy to you.

Again, how should a woman distinguish between a transwoman who you say is not a threat, and a man who may well be?

I'd be so tempted to take a load of women friends in there when men are in there and loudly ask for a tampon and then have a discussion about sanitary pads. I'd love to see what the men think of unisex loos then

Think we should all do that - and do one better. Leave used sanitary all over the place in retaliation for all the stinking urine all over the floor. Men would be begging for single sex loos then!

Home toilets being multi sex is the stupidest argument ever

Especially since there are multiple threads on MN where women complain about how grimy they are and how they are expected to clean them.

And I guess, further to that, how does a transwoman who is using the ladies as they feel unsafe sharing a toileting space with men distinguish another transwoman from a man?

Sufficient toilets segregated by sex, combined with a number of mixed sex toilets for those who cannot use the single sex toilets for whatever reason, is surely the way forward? (Purely mixed sex toilets are not the answer as they require a lot more space to construct, and many prefer to use a single sex space)

@YetAnotherSpartacus

Home toilets being multi sex is the stupidest argument ever

Especially since there are multiple threads on MN where women complain about how grimy they are and how they are expected to clean them.

Yep

And full of people saying were they being unreasonable to NOT let the workman in their bog

Plus last time i checked my toilet isn’t open to random UNINVITED members of the public

Individual cubicles with wash basins in cafes are fine as space is at a premium and is in no way the same as the toilets the OP and i just described

I know this is me taking a 'race to the bottom' viewpoint, which I don't usually do in any other circumstances. But...I would welcome a situation where it became the norm for men to have to join long queues in order to use a toilet. If men had to queue, the design of public toilets would suddenly become a matter of public concern. All those councils, businesses and transportation hubs with far more facilities for men than for women would suddenly be changed as a matter of priority. If the powers that be had to queue for fifteen minutes and then wedge themselves sideways into a cubicle so small that you have to stand to the side in order to shut the door, and the sanitary bin is almost balanced on the side of the toilet seat due to lack of space, the design would change. And it would change quickly.

When I was 8 months pregnant I actually got temporarily stuck in a restaurant toilet. The cubicle was so small that when I went into it facing inwards, my bump was over the toilet bowl, and the door swung shut behind me. I then discovered that it was too small to turn round easily, and I couldn't reach behind me to open the door again. It was quite scary actually. Took me about 20 minutes to get out again.

That must have been scary isabelle

Ive told this story before but we went as a family to a tourist attraction, the toilets were individual cubicles down a corridor, long queues

Very long queues...but the funny thing was that virtually all the men walked in and walked past all the women waiting

They obviously weren’t expecting to have to queue, they were fairly mortified when they were told they'd oxed the queue and there was a member of staff there so im thinking it had happened a lot and potentially caused issues

How many people use their own toilet at the same time a window cleaner is in there????

Strangers do not use my bathroom. Why would they?

I have different boundaries of privacy/dignity/wariness around my family in my own home.... they're different to the ones I have with total random strangers. Obviously. So the whole 'home toilets are mixed sex' is nonsense.

Thank you to the man who told women it was a storm in a tea cup because not being a woman he didn't get it, so obviously they're being silly. Not sexist at all. So so tired of men, who don't care about or understand anything that affects women because it's irrelevant to their own comfort and life experience, telling women what they may and may not mind about and what they should accept. As if it's their decision because they're women management.

I’d actually quite like it if the home toilet Argument was a valid one

It would be much easier if I’m caught short to rock up to some randoms house and use their loo

I’d only go to nice looking houses obviously

Until men all sit down to piss I really don't want to be sharing a toilet with them, especially after a few drinks.

In fairness a lot of women don't sit down to pee in public toilets either, the seats are often a mess. I agree this is grim though, the only set up I've seen that was okay was one of the nandos I've been to. All toilets could be used by anyone, but they were all in floor to ceiling cubicles (with concrete walls and thick wooden doors that also went floor to ceiling), and had sinks in the cubicles. I'm guessing they did it because of space, but it was fine, and always seemed clean. The set ups where it's just flimsy cubicles and communal sinks is somewhere I'd avoid.

@larrygrylls

This loo thing is so precious.

No one segregates loos at home (and most have builders, cleaners, window cleaners etc using them quite happily).

It is rare staff toilets in a small business are segregated, either, and most staff toilets in schools have been unisex forever.

And very few object to toilet cleaners of either sex.

Why would I care if anyone chatted about tampons?!

And, in public places, businesses, Loos should be cleaned and sanitised regularly, so blame the business if they are foul.

I get a lot of the women’s rights stuff about the TRA lobby but loos...major storm in a tea cup.

But the point is women are saying they feel uncomfortable with it; they are saying it’s important to them. Why is that not valid? How do you think it feels to be told that the thing you feel strongly about is a ‘storm in a teacup’.

Which rule of misogyny is that anyway? Or do we need a new one?

@RufustheSniggeringReindeer

I’d actually quite like it if the home toilet Argument was a valid one

It would be much easier if I’m caught short to rock up to some randoms house and use their loo

I’d only go to nice looking houses obviously

I might start letting randos use my toilet on the condition they help decorate the bathroom (and by help I mean do it all them self).

Also when we had building work done, lots of different trades people in and out (all men as it happened) we got a porta loo. I was not comfortable with sharing my loo with men I did not know for 9 months.

I would never visit the establishment again, and tell them why.

If transwomen want to use female toilets for a) validation b) supposedly to get away from males in male toilets, those toilets fulfil neither of these functions.

Who benefits? Only dodgy men as far as I can work out.