TOWIE

[campingismyjam17]

I got quite emotional last night about the scenes with Liam (Gatsby) and his mum at the football ground. My dad died 16 years ago and I still miss him.
I thought Bobby was funny, Gemma is not genuine. Lauren seems to think she is something really special. I just don't trust Jon, haven't read anything about him outside TOWIE but he just seems dodgy. We seem to be seeing a softer side to Tommy, he doesn't seem to be blowing up so much.I like Mario in it now, I think his friendship with Chloe S seems sweet.
I enjoyed Wednesdays episode.

I think Courtney is still with Myles and they're trying to rehabilitate how their relationship looks, hence the nasty aggression towards Jordan. Nothing has changed, she's still worried what he is thinking and how he will react, he's still controlling her, they're just pretending that she's all strong and "finding" herself.

myles is awful and clearly has anger issues, if Courtney gets back with him shes an idiot.

I don't think Pete and Shelby will last, I think shell have been with someone else by the time he gets back (is it true that he's going on that bear grylls show!?)

to be honest I wish Shelby and Clelia weren't in it, they just annoy me.

Def have some self respect amber. Dan wants a ready shag

Nothing else

Bobby was wrong to say about the photoshop comment yet then blames arg for telling GEMMA

If PETE gave Shelby his keys to house and see his family and dogs theb why doesn’t he say yes let’s be a couple

More chance for her to be faithful that way

Diags is acting like a cahnt. Nowt new there. I don't know why everyone thinks he's ok. Him and La Sims are a good friend match.

Chloe is acting like a cahnt. And a hypocritical one. I want to say to Adam.. are you on glue?

Arg is acting like a cahnt. But I'm confused cos he was okay with Ferne.

Lauren Pope is like a pile, Just when you think she's gone, she come back.

Little Court has indulged in too many nippy sweeties at the garden party.

Nice to see that Gatsby is still King. King of cahnts. Another mate of Ms Sims. Funny that.

Clelia? Plymouth called. They miss your cahntiness and want you back in your resident post of town cahnt. Don't forget to pack your sour face dear.

Amber love - sack him off. You can do that - just look in a mirror and say ta-ra chimp boy. Sorted.

Chimpboy can then fottfsof and take snidey Myles and Jonanderthal with him.

Bless. Yaz won the cakes. That'll make up for having an inferior arse...

They're clutching at straws trying to keep Towie interesting. There is a shortage of straws. I've a feeling they are being used at bed time by everyone to stop all the botched nasal passages collapsing. And Simmo has melted some for her lips.

Jut the usual pettiness

Even with counselling amber can’t see DAN doesn’t want a relationship

Amber is so desperate re Dan it's depressing 😳

Dan will never want a full relationship with anyone unless it's with his Lego hair.

Keep it coming @sheldonesque , love it, < makes naff heart sign with my hands to dodgy house music >

Think my next name change might be cahnt.

I would miss your hoicking though ladyrochford

Jury is out on your gusset.

Is next week the finale?

I predict Amber and Dan getting together as a couple (and him cheating several times before the next season)

Courtney and Myles getting back together (and splitting up again shortly afterwards)

Chloe S and the new man becoming officially a couple (and splitting up before next season)

Any patterns emerging

Who really wants to be in a relationship with a man who has to be forced into it with an electric cattle prod? He's just not into her. It's quite sad really.

I would quite like to see Chloe S with a decent guy whose not from towie and who will treat her and her daughter well and take her away from the show and that whole scene, she was actually in one of the magazines the other day saying that she feels too old for towie now and all the drama and she’s so right.

Bless you Court. You don't want folk thinking you're a mug and you are this and that. Well you are. And ruddy stupid to boot. You're as dead behind the eyes as that arsehole of yours. Perfect match.
Off you pop to Mexico. Don't come back.

I've never been a huge fan of Chloe L but I've liked her this series. Her ex-arsehole did her no favours. She is a changed girl. And did ruddy not deserve that shite from Amber.

Amber and chimpboy are both arseholes. What a catch. that you had to beg for

I couldn't be with Arg. He is a manchild. And he isn't an arsehole or a cahnt. He is both - a gaping great undercarriage hole.

Don't know what is worse - arseholes or cahnts. But there's a fine line between them anatomically as well as in Towie.

I'll have to gloss over the phlegm pool of Jonanderthal's carpet. His mam must kiss the vax in thanks every night.

Does no one else think Amber is a fake piece of shit? I genuinely cannot stand her. She is vile.

I agree buttermilk. I can't have Amber. She's so self obsesssed and petulant. She and Dan can fight over the mirror all day long (until she finds out he's been shagging all round him and even then she'd probably stay with him).

Indeed.

When the surgeon trimmed her beak, he left that and her self respect on the operating room floor. Then filled those perky orbs with 600ccs of self importance and denial.

Oh gawd. Amber and dan .....

Courtney and myles

Been there. Done that

Chloe gave good advice. No more bringing up the pasta

Surely GEMMA is capable of ordering /getting into a cab from the airport

And jaz has seemed to have forgiven lockie

Does anyone think that Celia looks like Meghan

I feel sorry for Jordan, he's getting a hard time but I don't think he's actually done anything much wrong.

Courtney's setting herself up for a fall because foot-face will cheat again. He's got that smug I-got/away-with-it look.

Are Chloe S and Lauren morphing into each other? Same hair, same fake tits, same Botox/filers, same weight, they. Are. one. Person.

Arg gets more annoying in each episode, he can do one with his beaver teeth and flippy flop hair.

I actually like Gatsby's tune. But I'm sleep deprived with sunstroke so am probably losing my grip on reality.

I'm surprisingly happy for Amber, even though she can be a vacuous bint (the old days were in black and white??) it's nice to see a real smile on her face - one that actually reaches the eyes!

My Tommy's getting chubby but I still would.

A gaping great undercarriage hole * if you ever stop posting on this thread Sheldon* I will cry proper tears for days with real Botox-defying emotion. That sounds like I'm up your arse doesn't it? But I'm actually nowhere near your undercarriage honestly.

Why do I always fail my bold. My bold is always failing.

Et tu LadyRochford

I agree about Jordan. Poor bugger has done nowt.

You are a poor old thing too. How exhausted must you be to be down with Gatsby's tune? He may think he is Eminem. Sadly he is more Ermnoyernot.

Your bolds might be failing cherub but your gusset is unflinching.

And that is more than can be said for me at the mere thought of anyone being in the vicinity of my undercarriage. Even if you are nobility x

Unflinching Gusset is my new name change 🤣.

How depressing that Amber was all 'yay' that Courtney might go away with Myles ... and she wonders why people say she has no self respect

It is bag the man at all costs though mini - even though the man doesn't want them really.

Deep down they know they can do better. Deep down they know they'd be better alone. But appearances count. And why wouldn't you want a man that can't keep his little man trousered? That means that he is the object of desire for others and means he is a catch. Right?

Because deep down he's only worth having if he is deep down into numerous lulus - none of which are yours...

Amber's face was hideous, so smug !!! He'll cheat on her ... she's basically hung around long enough so he's finally given in. They'll be split before it comes back !!

Sure I’ve said before

Don’t they ever work

99% if people can’t go on holiday tomorrow due to their jobs