X Factor Semis <snurk>. Let us marvel at these being the four most talented people in the country...

[SuePurblyFeltYourPresents]

Nanfucker singing Josh Groban AND Mickey Bubbles!

FUCK OFF Nanfucker.
If I hear another word about your Nan I swear I'll find a Hitman.

She had a pop at The Wang, didn't she?

He doesn't finish the end of his words, does he? Which is a blessing, I spose.

I loved the hand actions.

I wish he'd fall off a sodding mountain

Oh good Lord. I don;t think I can take this. And he said I yam. My pet hate. I Am, please. With a slight gap

My ears.....My ears..
Won't someone please think of the children

We raise you up.....to drop you from a great height into a cowpat.

If he IS on his Nan's shoulders, that's abuse.
As was that key change.

I am glad he hasnt sung To Where You Are.............. Thats one of Jacks songs and i couldnt bear him to ruin it...............

I'm joining you this week, although making Christmas cards too so may just read along.

Although listening to this I'm going to have to tuck into the sloe gin a bit early. Cards could be interesting this year....

Ugh that knee bendy thing. Like a toddler with a full nappy

I've also seen Jane Macdonald in Concert. I took my step mum for her birthday.

I am voting for James.

Vomit vomit

Fucking he'll I hate him more every second this goes on.

He's the same colour as those flames in the background!

What is More Than He Can Be, do we think?
Talented?

I hadn't anticipated him being on so early and I have prematurely used all my hooks, a selection of screwdrivers, some sharp twiglets and a pen. There is egg all over the sitting room and yet he's still warbling a way like a condom stuffed with sausage meat. I may need to rethink.

KILL HIM

I really don't want to his his raising, thanks. I'm just grateful that wardrobe haven't put him in Rylan's trousers.

God this is depressing enough to cause suicidal thoughts.
We should send him to Iraq. Not to please the troops. To scare the enemy into surrender

Fucking cruise ship. Preferably the Titanic.

Welcome emma, pull up a chair. Witty banter and sarcasm at the ready.

The second Dermie said someone special I was bingoing his Nan. Predictable song choice and it was lame.

Oh no Shitslinger is on side

Blee at Shitsinger feeling his performance.
Do you think she's done everyone else?

They're being nice to him so the public don't bother voting for him and he goes out - that's the Top Secret plan.