Professor White and the line dancing surfers eat cold turkey

[serialtester]

Welcome to the surfboard!

Oh dear Cleaning your friend has inadvertently thrown you under a bus.

Could you just say how much you were looking forward to getting out of the house after half term etc and you'd prefer drinks out? It's tricky.

It is possible to NOT buy the bag of tricks if you stay in but it will be hard so get your reinforced surfboard out (and get Mr C. on board?)

You can do this. I'm throwing armbands like a mad armband throwing woman.

Never mind flat, you've had a blip that's all. Enjoy Manchester!

Cleaning, whether you're in or out tonight just try your best. You've been doing brilliantly.

Just sitting out on our front step in some dazzling sun watching my youngest try to skateboard and drinking coffee.. I'm thinking this is what it's all about, not that fake shit.

Epiphany number 2 for our thread.

That's lovely lost!

Thanks guys. We're definitely going out for dinner and I'll just use my best stalling tactics to keep her out as long as possible and then go straight bed when I get home

Currently home alone cleaning and listening to old skool tunes 🙈

Stalling tactics;

Order lots of food,
Eat really slowly,
Insist on coffee after,
Engage the waiter in an in depth conversation when he brings the bill,
Insist on having a drink at the bar,
Tie your friend to her dining chair.

Good luck

You forgot nailing hands to the table!

Oh yes, take a small hammer and nails in your handbag as an emergency measure.
(see step 4 in Dr Lost's "Get It nailed" programme)

She's into the 50 Shades movies.... if I start to tie her the chairs and take out a array of strange objects I fear I may give the wrong impression... she'll be looking for the cable ties amongst the hardware

Thanks guys, I'm keeping schtum to dh re making a call... I'm determined not to slip up!!! 💪

You can do it cleaning. I'm sure she won't bat an eyelid at your snorkel and armbands!

Having a quiet evening today. Waters are calm!

Oh well if she like all things 50 Shades you can tie everybody up in the front room when you get home. No one will be getting near that flipping granite!

Evening is nigh and my surfboard is hurtling towards the Danger Zone. I'm not going down without a fight.

How is everybody else doing?

If she's doing it for the money what about if you just buy a bottle of wine after the meal and say it's your treat?

Ooh good thinking fairy

Take £80 cash with you and force booze down her neck. Job done!

Still surfing but waters are getting choppy

Disclaimer; don't force booze down her neck while she is tied to her restaurant chair. You maybe escorted out of the restaurant and/or arrested

Hi witty how are you? You can surf with me. At the moment I'm just trying to distract myself.

Witty, I'm throwing you and lost the illuminous arm bands.

Am also feeling the siren call though tbh. Wine not cutting it tonight.

Witty I'm bagging the pink illuminous armbands, you can have the yellow ones.

Having strange arguments in my head about the pros and cons of getting a bit which is annoying.
I really want to get a few weeks clean under my belt as I think this will get easier and the cravings will start to fade a bit I fucking hope they will aargh!

serial have you recovered from the work buffet poisoning debacle?

I have. Scrambled eggs and soup cured me (not together!) Am up to sipping wine genteelly.

Well that lot will be messy if it comes back up (glad you're better)

Having a crisp beer here (in a glass) I do have some class.

I'm a straight from the bottle gal #common

Having chilli in a bit, just to make things interesting!

Chilli is a brave move.