Primary school auties : spring 2021 and beyond - thread 6

[danni0509]

Hi. New thread.

This is the continuation of the thread for parents / carers of autistic children / children with additional needs. Most of us are parents of children in year 1 / year 2.

Links to old threads

Thread 1 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3080753-DS-with-ASD-starting-school-Sept-2018-I-am-feeling-overwhelmed

Thread 2 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3451020-Reception-auties-2018-19-thread-2

Thread 3 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3628263-Auties-transition-to-Year-1-thread-3

Thread 4 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3748449-Primary-school-Auties-into-2020-thread-4

Thread 5 - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3953023-Primary-school-auties-summer-and-beyond-thread-5?pg=1

Everyone welcome x

That's a lousy situation to be in Danni. Are they looking at other agencies (for specialist teachers)?

No they aren’t getting another specialist in at all.

They said ds only has a short amount of time left between now and July and he could leave before if other school can sort it out so they will manage with miss x & miss x and have back up staff on hand which is fine by me but a) what is happening to the money the la paid direct to them a few weeks ago for specialist & b) if miss x & miss x are managing him until he leaves then why did he get sent home yesterday morning because of ‘crisis point’ ?

I only found out last night they weren’t getting another specialist teacher in I was under the impression they were getting the agency to send somebody else.

The worst part of that is they cut him to 2.5 hours a day start of November which lasted 15 weeks until the send manager phoned them because they wanted specialist support, they finally got specialist support then it doesn’t work out and it’s suddenly ok for ds to be in with standard teaching assistants now, so why the 15 week shit then?

Nothing they do makes any sense at all.

danni you need to speak to the head of SEND about this, whoever it was you spoke to before. They can’t just appropriate this money.

Open how has school being going for ds? Is he going in ok etc.

danni so far so good, he’s going in ok. Hopefully he’ll be back full time after the Easter holidays. Today he slept until 5:10 am. I think the last time he did that was Christmas Day!

Unbelievable danni! They've basically just stolen a load of money. Hope ds was ok today.

Glad school is going well open.

Well done on the dentist dimples! You must've been so proud of him.

Just been sent this link for a free seminar on picky eaters. I haven't had the time to do it yet but could be useful. It's 2hrs long:

sosapproachtofeeding.com/parent-workshop-when-children-wont-eat/

Oh thanks liv, will take a look.

Thanks for the link liv.

Pleased ds is settling back in open.

During lockdown ds school has still been doing pupil of the week (ds has never got this / whatever) they do a virtual assembly each week, as you already know ds is never included, that’s fine don’t care but they have started doing reading certificates again so if you read twice in a week the child gets a bug club stamp then once they have 5 stamps they get a certificate and a book. The teacher knows you have been reading as when you log in to bug club she can see when you have logged in, what you have read, when you need new books etc etc (she told me this herself)

So yet again reading awards go out, some children getting a back log of them from during lockdown when they weren’t being awarded, the headteacher says these children have been reading lots of books etc etc ds doesn’t get one, not ONE.

I’ve been online on his bug account and he has read 90 books on bug club since 4th September, I just went to his ‘library’ and counted them up since the start of year 2.

He reads every fucking night on there and she will know this as she can see!

He consistently reads, probably 6 if not 7 nights a week and he doesn’t get the certificates or books the others are getting. I’m doubtful all of those children are reading more than him, how could that be possible if he’s reading every night!

Really boils my piss 😡 he’s left out of everything but the one thing he’s getting on well with and the only area he’s actually making progress in which I’m proud of him for, is not being recognised at all.

I’m not even mentioning it because then I’ll get his certificates but only because I’ve raised it.

Yes I’m petty 😂

Even if they don’t include him in the virtual assembly because he’s difficult to video or whatever (fine) but at least send the bloody certificates and rewards home. Don’t just completely miss him off.

You're not being petty, I would bloody well tell them and demand it. It's absolutely not on. If you haven't already, I would draft a letter to both the governors (not sure if you've ever contacted them) and copy in the LA and Ofsted and send it either before (if you are brave) or after ds has left outlining everything that has happened. It's absolutely outrageous.

Danni that is not being petty, that is shit. DS's school don't get everything right but they do seem to ensure that everyone gets at least two headteacher's awards a year. When the reading record is all online there is no excuse.

Surprising news from DS's school today. The SENCO called to ask permission for him to be assessed by a private OT. I had contacted the same company a couple of years ago myself but couldn't afford it so I am thrilled.

So glad that you got a 'lie in' Open.

Liv I actually welled up with tears at the dentist - hope that I don't cry when it's my turn next week!

Yay for sleep @openupmyeagereyes! DS was awake at 5.30am this morning 'because of the wind'...
Yay for OT report @dimples76 and assessment.
You are not petty @danni0509, I would be furious.
Our saga trundles on. DS made me a lovely mother's day card. Hope everyone has a lovely day on Sunday, I have my jab!!

MrsDuBeke it has been really windy

I haven’t opened my Mother’s Day card yet, it’s sitting on the mantelpiece. I can’t wait 🥰

This week has gone well for us. I’m hoping he’ll cope ok with an extra hour next week. We’re aiming for full time after the Easter holidays, I’m going to miss him.

So glad to hear about jabs! And great news about the OT assessment @dimples76!

Just another voice saying you're not being petty at all @danni0509. This was a perfect easy opportunity for them to include DS and make him feel good about learning and about school and they have completely fluffed it - why? Doesn't make sense.

Glad the week's gone well @openupmyeagereyes - and good luck for the extra hour next week! It does feel weird having a quiet house now...

Hope everyone's week has started well.

I have been keeping a diary for continence team. Although I was aware of the problem it was shocking seeing it in black and white how little DS drinks. But how do I get him to drink more? The instructions were not to prompt your child to go to the toilet to see what they can manage independently. DS had 4 accidents on Saturday including a poo on the stairs. Fortunately the diary is now complete.

What was v interesting on Sunday was that mid screaming fit DS turned to my Mum who was deliberately ignoring him and said why aren't you looking at me?

dimples my ds doesn’t drink enough either, I’m always pushing water on him. Hopefully the continence team can help with his toileting.

How interesting re. your ds’ tantrum, did he stop after that?

Our week is going ok so far. He was a bit reluctant yesterday but went in fine today. We had a run of a few later mornings but the last two have been very early again, hoping for better tonight.

Hope that you have a better night Open.

DS paused screaming and then continued. Made me question how much of his screaming is dysregulation and how much is how he chooses to behave.

Yes, I guess the question is what purpose is the behaviour serving and what other strategies can be used to meet whatever the need is. Not easy though is it, if it was we probably wouldn’t need this thread! Did the screaming start before dd arrived or afterwards?

We did indeed get a better night. Ds woke just before 5 and called me when his clock turned 5 (we’ve been trying to encourage him to stay in bed until then). If dh and I are both still in bed at 5am then it feels like a win these days

Sorry, I somehow stopped getting notifications for this thread.

Sorry to hear the school are still utterly shit @danni0509

I have my DD's early review on the 31st as school want her in specialist. We've had no violence since November and the whole thing reads what progress she has made yet in their comments "she can't make progress in this setting" . LA aren't going to buy that!

Also on the incontinence diaries here for DS!

Good luck with the review MumofSend. I have forgotten what setting do you want for your child?

Open so sorry that after 5 is a good day. DS used to scream but nowhere near as much. Sometimes I think it is v sensory e.g. DD crys,/screams and he is trying to control the noise, other times like at Granny's I think that it is more jealousy/attention seeking.

We have our review soon too @Mumofsend and I also want DS' difficulties evidenced. We want special provision, Ms agree with us, la not so much so...slt told me that she thinks he's too 'high functioning ' for our preferred placement but he's only

Posted too soon! Only like that when having high levels of support. Argh!!

Ds got his reading awards today, he got 1 at Xmas then nothing since, he’s received 2 today and a head teachers award (sticker book) I didn’t say anything.... honestly sometimes wonder if someone is reading 🙋‍♀️ 😂

Dimples sounds like ds is looking for an audience with your mum, ds is like that when he’s smashing my ornaments. (Can’t ignore that to be fair) but he looks at me, waits for me to watch him then picks whatever up and smashes it. Sorry about the soiling etc ds HAD been clean / dry in the day for 3 months that’s all gone to pot and since last Monday he’s had 4 accidents at school, 2 being really messy Pooh that I had to go in and clean up. He keeps going under the picnic bench at school to do it. Stresses me when he’s done so well! Really makes me feel shit when it’s 1 step forward 10 steps back. Thankfully though he’s still doing ok at home, was going to take bedtime nappies away but not rushing it they can stay for now x

Hello to everyone else!