SPOOFS II - IT'S STILL RELEVANT

[Hullygully]

Madame - he deffo wants a Love Tap, and steroids.

don't you fucking DARE try to be lightheartedandfunny around here Ms Tufty

I have no friends left

It's really weird

One by one

That's a bit shit Hully.

Ok this is REALLY SERIOUS

So one of my dear friends accused me tonight of abusing her by not being nice enough about her cat (rescue, psychologically damaged 20 year old cat that wants to kill everyojne that she is slowly feeding to death in an attempt to make it love her)

I said, but I only deal in reality. I know you love your cat but it is (see above)

And she said why would you be so negative when you know I love the cat?

HELP ME

Why is it all going so wrorg?

IS IT ME?

wrong

fucking wrong

Then her and the other two friends let themselves into my house (they have a key) and I had to throw them out

I am fifty soon

This can't be right

I am deadly serious

ANd I need you lot to be honest and tell me

Is it me?

I think it might be the cat.

If you ate being serious hully, your friends sound bonkers. And it's not you. You need a better quality of friend.

When I am considering a new friend one of my filters is "is this a mad cat woman?"

Never let me down yet.

Hully, Zombie only knows you from here on MN. She admires your honesty and straight talking. Zombie has spent too much of her life being a people pleaser and (at nearly 61 years of age) is only just learning that that is often a road to nowhere.

So, no, she doesn't think it's you.

It's not you. Whybdid they let themselves into your house though? and having a go at you over a fat cat is, quite frankly, mad. It rwally is.

I am being serious

I am in tears

I literally don't understand anyone or anything

If you are good friends and love each other, why would you assume bad things?

That's the bit I don't get

Did you say, "You are feeding that psychotic cat to death, and if it were actually the baby you are substituting it for, you should be prosecuted for abuse. You freak."? Then yes, it is you.

If you were a little more diplomatic,even a little bit, then it is her.

One has a key because I have her key too and we do plants and stuff, you know

Zombie I have to say I think you are fab [bugrin] In every situation

Oh hully. Don't cry.

And get your key back from mad cat lady.

I only know you online Hully, I like you, I agree with you lots and disagree sometimes too.
Why did you have to throw them out?
And pah at 50, I'm 56, it doesn't make a blind bit of difference what age you are, I'm way cooler than many younger people on here.

I just say things like, as she lies on the floor next to it and it twitches its tail and is obese, and she says, Look at the lovely kitty, That kitty is really unhappy and you are feeding it way too much and kindness can kill type stuff

Surely, as we head into the twilight, we are allowed to be honest with each other?

And try and save the cat?