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Original poster

Did it hurt when you lost your virginity?

79 replies

QuimReaper · 18/11/2016 22:26

I found my first 2-3 sexual experiences absolute agony, and from the very few conversations I've ever had with friends on the topic in the subsequent 11-odd years, thought this was completely normal.

However, in a recent discussion with another friend she was bemused by this and said she experienced little or no pain. I was intrigued so took to the internet, and it seems (from such reputable sources as redit Hmm ) that this isn't uncommon. However, a lot of the other hits were clearly aimed at teenage girls and didn't want to scare the bejeezus out of them, so were much more coy.

I'd be interested in a straw poll of actual women. Did it hurt like hell at first, or was it just me?

OP posts:
BonsGirl · 25/11/2016 23:56

No pain or blood whatsoever! Even had an orgasm...!

LuluJakey1 · 27/11/2016 23:15

No, not at all.

LadyFanjo · 27/11/2016 23:18

No real pain other than a stretchy stinging pain. I do remember thinking, is that it? During it though. I also really needed a wee throughout but was too embarrassed to say anything... Blush

WetsTheFinger · 27/11/2016 23:21

No, but I'd already experimented with masturbation and toys before that and my first boyfriend had a tiny penis Grin

OrianaBanana · 27/11/2016 23:26

Yes and blood too. However the pain continued and it turned out I had a condition called vulval vestibulitis. If pain continues it's worth going to the GP as it could be that, or can also be (I think) a symptom of an STD.

passmethewineplease · 27/11/2016 23:33

Hurt quite a lot and bled loads. Guy was a complete idiot who didn't listen to me when I was saying ow and to slow down. AngryAngryAngry

Such a horrible first time if I'm honest.

2nd time was better but uncomfortable at first but fine after that.

Yoarchie · 27/11/2016 23:36

No pain or blood. But I was 18 and sporty so had prob been long rid of hymen etc.

oldlaundbooth · 27/11/2016 23:38

No, in fact I remember thinking 'is that it?' GrinConfused

Maybe we didn't do it right.....

Shemozzle · 27/11/2016 23:41

Didn't hurt, didn't bleed, and it wasn't gentle either. But I was very drunk.

HeyRoly · 27/11/2016 23:43

It hurt SO MUCH. Stretchy stinging pain to the max.

It hurt for a long time too, to the extent that I didn't want to have sex frequently. Ended up buying a Rampant Rabbit in an attempt to stretch myself grandually, with lube, on my own terms (should probably point out that I was a late starter at sex and was past 20 at this point!).

See eventually became pain free but tore badly during childbirth and a long period of no sex took me back to square one. And 18 months after DC2 (again, long period of no sex, and a c section because I was convinced I'd tear again!) it still hurts.

I just think some women have tight, not very stretchy vaginas, and I'm one of them. My most recent smear was bloody agony.

OhhBetty · 28/11/2016 16:00

Hurt a bit. It was more the stinging after and I was bleeding a lot. I was only 14 though.

HairsprayBabe · 28/11/2016 16:08

It didn't hurt me at all, and I didn't bleed either I was 15 not a horse rider or a tampon user, but I was very umm ready Wink

Blueskyrain · 30/11/2016 19:11

Didn't hurt at all and didn't bleed. I'm not sporty, and only started using tampons later.

ALittleOblivion · 09/12/2016 23:32

Another one who experienced no pain and wondered whether this was it :-D Was during my period though so perhaps added lube...?! BF at the time asked afterwards whether it had hurt and seemed almost miffed that I said no, as if it was some kind of criticism perhaps!

Obsidian77 · 09/12/2016 23:39

No pain, no blood. I think penis size and the amount of foreplay probably make a difference. As well as how ready you were emotionally.

Wayfarersonbaby · 09/12/2016 23:41

Yes and no. No because I broke my own hymen beforehand at about 17 as I'd read about it helping with first sexual experiences - hot bath, slight pressure downwards, didn't hurt at all (kind of went pop....)

But yes still hurt a bit in another way because my vagina is kind of at a funny angle I guess, and I always have to make sure things are angled just right or it will still hurt initially for a second or two even now.

itsbetterthanabox · 10/12/2016 13:19

Yes it hurt a lot and I bled. We stopped after only a couple of seconds it hurt so much. We had done loads of foreplay, used lube and went really gently and slow. I was relaxed and trusted him, nearly 18 years old and really wanted to do it. Still horrible.
We had also been doing other sexual stuff for months before.
I'd been using tampons for many years and rode horses weekly as a child.
It didn't just hurt the first time too, it hurt for about 5 times after.
I don't get how it doesn't hurt others.

Snowflake65 · 10/12/2016 13:36

Didn't bleed, not pain as such just a being stretched feeling but we had done lots of foreplay and I loved the guy.

Branleuse · 10/12/2016 13:41

didnt hurt at all, in fact i remember wondering if it was in. I probably shouldnt have said it out loud though

mrssmith79 · 10/12/2016 13:46

Honestly can't remember, so on that basis I'll say no.

FlowerDilemma · 10/12/2016 13:52

No. I orgasmed the first time I had sex. But masturbated alot and was used to penetration.

ApollO88 · 10/12/2016 13:53

Yes it did. But now that I'm 27 and have 3 sexual partners since the first I now understand that he was actually very well endowed and it explained the pain from the first few times

eachtigertires · 24/12/2016 03:19

Yes it stung and bled for about the first 5 times. I was a horse rider all my life but not really a regular tampon user although I had used them before (just didn't get on with them).

ohtheholidays · 24/12/2016 03:30

Yes the first time it was really painful but after the first time it never hurt again.

addstudentdinners2 · 24/12/2016 04:25

Yes because it was rape.

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