Don't want my GF sharing a room with colleague....

[iminsecurez]

Both female
Live together ,4 year relationship.
She's started a new job and in 2 weeks going away with her work mates for a company works party.
They have been told they will be sharing a room with a colleague.
My partner sharing with her boss
I know it makes no sense but I don't like the idea.
I can't say anything because I know I'm being silly.

Would you feel this way ?

No it wouldn’t bother me.

If your GF is okay with it then there’s no reason you shouldn’t be.

I know it makes no sense but I don't like the idea

I suppose you don't have to like it because you aren't the one doing it.

It would be an awkward coincidence if her boss happened to be gay also. But in usual circumstances it's something that work colleagues do without issue.

I can actually see the issue tbh.

You could argue she wouldn't be asked to share with a man.

In my opinion, if they can't afford to put everyone in separate rooms then they can't afford a works party.

But perhaps she is perfectly fine with it? If so then it's not really your place to say otherwise.

Do you have reason not to trust your partner? What exactly are you worried might happen? Is the colleague she's sharing with male or female?

Hard to say because I’m not gay and I think it is different to sharing a room with a person of the opposite sex. Are you typically jealous in relationships?

edit to add, sorry I quoted, I know that’s a bit of a MN etiquette disaster 😬

If she is happy then it's fine.

When I was junior at work, conferences often involved room sharing because the budget was tight. People with medical needs or only-female-at-the-conference (me) got their own room. But otherwise insisting on a single room meant someone couldn't go.

I guess the fact she's gay and with another woman is the issue here, same as if your straight wife was staying in a room with a straight guy.

Would you be ok if she was sharing with a male colleague?

Hell would freeze over before I would share a bedroom with a colleague. I need my personal space and don't want to lie in bed listening to someone I work with snoring and farting. I think it's utterly inappropriate for any firm to expect work colleagues to share bedrooms.

However, having said that it is up to your GF whether she is happy with the idea. DH has shared rooms with folks he worked with for most of his days - he worked away on building sites and it was common to share digs with people. He doesn't mind (although, to be fair he IS the snorer and farter in the situation and is probably asleep within 2 mins of getting into bed. I'm not sure how his coworkers felt about the arrangements.

I think if your GF is ok with it, then it's not really up to you to have an opinion.

FWIW I'm gay and I don't follow your logic here at all. What is it that is bothering you?

I don't like the idea of her sharing a Room with a random woman she's known for a month.
Not a friend ,she's just a woman she works with.
I don't like it
And yes I'm a bit jealous

If I had a boyfriend and it was him sharing with a female colleague...people would understand but because it's a woman people think it should be okay.

I get it - I wouldn't like it if I were you but especially wouldn't like it if I were your girlfriend. I'd definitely have covid or similar on the day of the party.

You sound very insecure. Why should it even matter? It wouldn't bother me at all.

I'm not insecure
I just don't want my girlfriend sharing with another woman
If your husband was sharing with another woman you don't mind ?

This is what I asked above.

Can you not get her to share a twin room with a guy then instead?

@Clamfoo no HR only allow same sex room shares

Ah yeah that figures.

Well as long as her boss is as straight as they come then I'd not worry.

Why, though? You surely get that this isn't a 'random woman' - it's her boss. She's sharing because it's a work do and she's drawn the short straw of sharing with the boss.

What on earth is there to be jealous about?

Oh, totally, because if she were a dyke then obviously they'd be at it like rabbits, right?

I mean, come on.

I can understand where the OP is coming from, can't you?

Would you let your husband sleep in a twin room with a woman from work? It's the same deal.

Would you prefer it if she shared with a man? One you knew was hetero and may not know she's gay? You are saying you are jealous of, a probably straight woman, who is not going to be interested at all on a sexual level. Even if you don't trust your GF with a straight woman - which it sounds like you don't- it's her boss, so if your GF made a move, she'd likely be in deep shit with work.