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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Ever stayed in a relationship after infidelity?

103 replies

Sage90 · 10/09/2024 19:13

Hi. Looking for perspective whilst in an emotional rutt.

Has anyone ever stayed with a partner after they have been unfaithful (in any way) and if so, what was the outcome? Can it ever work?

OP posts:
Sage90 · 19/09/2024 19:53

Chillimuma · 19/09/2024 16:21

Following as in a similar boat

Hope you're doing okay x

OP posts:
Sage90 · 19/09/2024 19:54

Thanks everyone for the replies. I feel different about it every minute

OP posts:
Freeflight · 21/09/2024 07:51

I think it depends on what the person does after they have been unfaithful and been found out.
Is there clear remorse, do they answer all questions honestly, do they seek therapy for themselves to understand why they made that choice, do they suggest couples therapy to process what has happened together.
I'm not a "once a cheater, always a cheater" person. We are all capable of it. Some do it for their own thrills, others make genuine errors with mitigating factors. Its the aftermath that tells the story too.

My husband did all the wrong things and I did the "pick me" part thinking that I had somehow been a bad wife so I needed to do better.
It took 7 years for him to finally admit that he had been unfaithful. I eventually seeked my own therapy and came to the realisation that I had been suffering and unhappy ever since. We went to couples therapy but it was too late.
We are now divorced. It's was the best choice I made as I've given myself back my self worth.

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