Would you rather have a relationship for the rest of your life with lots of highs and lots of lows, or be single for the rest of your life?

[Dr1ppin]

Just that really. Highs are amazing, lows are pretty unbearable. Or be single forever?

[Bingobongo1]

Without a doubt single.

[TimelyManor]

Single. I have never been happier than since my very long relationship ended. There were good times but the lows were very low and very nearly killed me. I was told yesterday I'm a completely different person to what I was when I was with him. That shames me but I was in such a fog I didn't realise.

My life now is calm, happy, relaxed and the only stresses I have are so much easier to handle without him adding to them. Or causing them.

If you're needing to make a leap, OP, it takes courage but is SO worth it

[IndieTara]

Single. I do miss some of the nice parts of being in a relationship though , the company , the sex , the diy...
BUT I don't miss sharing my space, clearing up after another supposed adult or the general irritation of somebody under my feet that I have to consider.

[steppemum]

Really depends on the lows.
But there are loads of things I wouldn't tolerate, and would rather leave.

It is hard to say without more information, but probably single.

[SeaEagleFeather]

Single.

[Doyoumind]

Single. I've already pretty much made that choice IRL. If I found someone where I felt there would be many highs and some dips rather than lows I would consider it but I don't see the benefit at all if you spend a significant amount of time feeling desperately unhappy.

[lazylinguist]

Single, unquestionably. But I've never been in a remotely turbulent relationship. I don't do drama, am not a very emotional person and am not attracted to 'big highs, big lows' kind of men at all and never have been tbh. I have a lovely chilled out marriage with no rows. If I found myself single again (for whatever reason) I would stay that way.

[Adviceneeded20]

I would say neither of your options OP.. I’d rather be in a happy, secure and drama free relationship.

After a relationship with a personality disordered individual, I would say that my base line criteria is emotional regulation.

Find someone who can regulate their emotions, who has empathy and compassion and you’ve found the perfect balance.

[ALbigbump]

‘The highs of a h/l relationships are amazing & very addictive, but the lows eat you up & make you feel insecure. Never again!‘

Totally agree. Rollercoaster relationships are exhausting from my experience. Single all the way, if that’s the only alternative

[FannyFernackerpan]

Single without a doubt. I'm single by choice and staying that way.

[Hie2021]

Single, I’ve had That relationship - it’s exhausting!