Would you rather have a relationship for the rest of your life with lots of highs and lots of lows, or be single for the rest of your life?

[Dr1ppin]

Just that really. Highs are amazing, lows are pretty unbearable. Or be single forever?

[quote Clementinewine]@SoulofanAggron yes and I believe you may have been on my other thread giving great advice? (Gut feelings one).

So so bad. Put up with it for 2 years because I did love him, I am sad now but the highs and lows were ridiculous. Not had that kind of rollercoaster ever before, even though all the issues were usually blamed on me (if that's the case why did I manage to have a much steadier and much longer relationship before that, hmm).

Before I met him I was thinking I was done with relationships now and this has cemented it. I will always choose single first now and will definitely choose that over a rollercoaster relationship. Most ridiculous thing I have ever experienced in my life.[/quote]
Clementine, your relationship sounds exactly like my recent 2 year one. I ended it earlier this year. It was always my fault, he reckoned he could feel my mood brewing, er, and of course I over reacted about everything. The mood brewing was when he was starting with his shit and I wasn't having any of it. Why wasn't I answering him fast enough, why was I online and not messaging him, where had I been for x hours etc etc. Nah. I walked away with my held held high. Can't be doing with all that crap. He too is nearly 50. Unless some form of a miracle presents itself before me, I will remain single. And far happier.

I chose singledom and haven't regretted it. Even if it turns out to be for the rest of my life. I love my life.

Never say never though - who knows what the future might bring.

Relationships do nothing for women. Women only tolerate them to have babies.

Wow. Not true at all. Believe it or not some relationships are pretty close and happy. Massive generalisation.
Not every person is abusive!

Single - I like being in control of my life

As you’ve posed the question - single - but you do know it’s possible to have a relationship that is calm and straightforward right?

I'd rather be single than have that sort of relationship. I need stability and so do my children. It's better to be single and know that it's all on you, the housework, childcare, etc than not know what you're coming home to.

Having read this full thread, does this mean there are equal numbers of men thinking 'never again' about relationships with women?

Or men who are INCEL and pissed off about it?

Mint, wouldn't it be nice if it meant men thinking "If I treat a woman badly, she will leave. I need to respect her and treat her well".

Well, if the choice is only between these two things, then presumably I'm stranded on a desert island with only one other person. In which case, hope it's a big island or the separation might be awkward.

In real life I'd take option 3.

I've had 3 turbulent relationships in my life and said never again (I'm 49), I was a very happy single person. Then I met someone last year and I'm in a calm/emotionally mature and stable relationship, so it is possible for them to exist!

But to answer the direct question, I'd rather be single than in a rollercoaster relationship.

@clementinewine
Same here! Just dumped a miserable 50yr old, I'm 40! Single 100% for me.
The constant comments about my friends, hobbies, dress sense, family - all passed of as "jokes or banter" then super sulking if I mentioned his attitude & blaming me for the old chestnut that "I'm too sensitive"
Never felt calmer post dumping him & the energy I now have without the mental drama is flippin amazing!
I've since noticed how all my happiest strongest female friends are all totally single too! 😁

Single, without a doubt.

Definitely single.

Definitely single, I’ve been single for 5 years and perfectly happy on my own

I've had this and the highs aren't worth it and nothing good came of the relationship anyway. A complete waste of time and energy. I am far too old for this nonsense now. I would be single

Haha @isthismylifenow and @Summer2003 were we all dating the same man child 😂

I am currently remaining strong as possible as we are neighbours and broken up before. Avoiding at all costs! Break up happened weekend just gone when I recognised the same bullshit behaviour happening, called him out on it, and couldn't even drag an apology out of it. Yeah I'm not perfect but at least I see my flaws. He never acknowledges that any of his behaviour is less than perfect.

So I thought fuck this, I'm out. For the final time!!!

Single!

Oh yeah and I got the "I'm too sensitive" and overreacting bullshit too. And the "why don't you text first" childishness, after withdrawing when I had apparently angered him. I'll tell you why, because I know what stupid game you are playing, I know you are withdrawing/silent treatment/punishing and I refuse to be a part of it as you have played it before and rubbed it in my face before. (Never mind the fact I am rubbish at messaging anyone and he knew that about me...)

Funny thing is the final argument was about something insane he overreacted to. And I thought someone older would be mature.

Single, and I’d move in with a friend.

If a man makes me cry or is disrespectful they’re out

Single

Single.

Single. Although I have a live in DP I'm not cut out to be in a relationship. People annoy me, I like my own space and the way I do and have things. I also don't do drama.

I'd rather be single anyway

The statistics show single women and men live longer than married women. I must say I'm not surprised.

I've never been married, had two longish live in relationships which were mostly on an even keel and obviously shorter ones, some of which weren't and wouldn't change anything. I'm very happy being single and living alone

The statistics show single women and men live longer than married women.
How can they distinguish between people living longer because they are single, and people being single because they live longer?