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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

anyone catch their dh or dp masturbating?!!!

119 replies

wishing1 · 15/02/2007 21:18

He doesn't know I know he is really shy about things and this sometimes affects our sex life because when we are on vacation he doesn't have time alone and we have LOTS of sex its great, but back home again 2-3 times per week and he does hisself in between?

OP posts:
ELF1981 · 21/02/2007 21:11

I thought it was better not to use anything to increase the amount of friction?!

bananaloaf · 21/02/2007 21:20

my husband says it a regular occurance for the guys in the office he used to work with to disapear into the toilet including himself!and not just for a pee and a poo

Nikki76 · 21/02/2007 21:22

Oh my! When (if??!) I go back to work will be very suspicious of any sticky keys on the keyboard I end up using.....

[grins]

Original poster
wishing1 · 21/02/2007 21:26

I am laughing, at the office??!! I can't even see my dh between surgeries scrubbing up his hands and his winky!!!!!!!!!OMG, how funny. He'd probably fall asleep while doing a procedure, :0 hopefully he doesn't do it while at work, he's so serious at work, I can't even imagine him wanking at the hospital.

OP posts:
ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 21/02/2007 21:31

Well I should hope not Wishing.. I'm definitely one of the pro-wanking brigade (am yet to actually find any of LazyAnna's anti wanking brigade actually.. "they" must realise it's a lost cause! )..

..but I think perhaps the "Work Wankers" to whom BananaLoaf refers would be those with tedious officey pen-and-key-pushing jobs.. not GPs! I gather you may be in the US, Wishing.. well over here, the good ole NHS means we have long enough queues in the waiting room as it is, without having to wait an extra hour or two because our GPs are having a tug between patients!!

Nikki76 · 21/02/2007 21:38

I've often seen men come back into the office with their trousers pulled way high Simon Cowell style and just thought oh, they've had a dump (its so obvious when the trousers are all adjusted) but now when I go back I'll just be thinking they've been sat on the bog and having a tug......well, won't be going to the vending machine after they have been there!!!

Do women do it in the office loos I wonder????

ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 21/02/2007 21:41

When I had a boring office job the only think I used to do in the Ladies (besides peeing) was power napping!

NotQuiteCockney · 21/02/2007 21:43

From what I know, lube is more necessary for circumcised men. Uncircumcised men are more self-lubricating, so to speak. And yeah, water-based is nicer than anything else.

HappyDaddy · 21/02/2007 21:43

We're doing power something, shiny!

ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 21/02/2007 21:47

Power wanking.. I've heard it all now.. ... I suppose you can get to lift-off in 60 seconds??

I thinks that's known as premature ejaculation actually.....

Nikki76 · 21/02/2007 21:49

PMSL

HappyDaddy · 21/02/2007 21:53

It's only premature if there's someone else there to complain. Otherwise it's a personal best!

Original poster
wishing1 · 22/02/2007 01:23

ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands:
I'm laughing! Yes there is a long enough wait without waiting for the gp to tug between patients, that's why I say I'm sure mine doesn't at work, I doubt he gets much time to go to the bathroom! Girls I don't think would wank in a bathroom at work. Yes we are in the US.

OP posts:
hockeypuck · 22/02/2007 06:51

Happy Daddy said "It's only premature if there's someone else there to complain. Otherwise it's a personal best!"

Surely that has to be quote of the week?!!

Catbabydaddy · 22/02/2007 08:42

Wanking is fantastic stress relief - done for that reason it has nothing to be with being an alternative / preference to sex.

And yes, I do it in the office sometimes! A quick one makes a bad day so much easier to get thouugh...

ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 22/02/2007 09:30

Yes that was was fab quote HD.. .. I replied to it and then didn't post it because I deemed it too rude!

sazjaz · 22/02/2007 09:44

i asked my dp if he did last night ( after id finished laughing ) and he was addament that he doesnt ( yeah rite ) he thinks this site is just a bitchfest against men .so im gonna join him up to a gay site to make him feel better hahahaha

HappyDaddy · 22/02/2007 13:26

Shiny, if you deemed it too rude, it must have been bad!

ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 22/02/2007 15:34

But I am a laydeeeeeeeeeeee!

HappyDaddy · 22/02/2007 16:01

So you keep saying....

Original poster
wishing1 · 22/02/2007 17:06

I do like that quote also! Wanking at the office still cracks me up. I went out with a guy many years ago who was always wanking and it interfered with our sex life but at least he was honest about it. I used to get upset that on a rare occasion he would turn me down, I was offended, but then when I found out why (on my own of course) I understood that he couldn't go a second round but couldn't tell me, so I felt much better, but communication guys is the key to any relationship. If he would have said, "uh, I took care of myself while you were at work," I wouldn't have felt like a reject

OP posts:
HappyDaddy · 22/02/2007 17:08

When I was a teen, i decided to have a quick wank before going to see girlfriend at hers. I knew her parents would be there so thought ahhh why not.

Get there to be told, they've only just got back theyve been out all day and i was gonna shag your brains out. Why are you late?

Let that be a lesson to you all...

ELF1981 · 22/02/2007 19:56

but then surely it lasts longer - and you gets women talking about the fantastic long sessions you shared?!

Spidermama · 22/02/2007 19:58

Funnily enough I've never caught him which is odd cos I know he's at it all the time.

PurpleLostPrincess · 24/02/2007 13:46

Not sure how this will be received but I usually kiss his neck if he wants to do it and I've got nothing to offer (doesn't happen very often). Other than that, we generally do it together if we're not going to actually embark on a full blown session. On the odd occasion when he's horny and I'm not, I've told him to go have a wank but he says it isn't right without me there. Also, he doesn't like it if I tell him I've pleasured myself without him!

I'd love to know your thoughts on this!?