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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

My ex called my lady garden a 'guy'...gay?

87 replies

Nais83 · 12/10/2014 00:00

Been wondering a while but my last ex called my lady bits a guy......we were playing in the bedroom and he touched me and said 'hey little guy' ......this was a guy who went to bed with a teddy bear and hot water bottle and told me he peed sitting down....I stayed with him for a year despite him being a workaholic but all this stuff confused hell outta me...any thoughts??

OP posts:
Dirtybadger · 12/10/2014 00:23

The only real indicators of homosexuality are same-sex sexual desire and same-sex sexual behaviour, really. In the absence of those I would stick with assuming he isn't homosexual. There are no other "gay" behaviours. I can confirm he sounds a little odd, though.

Peeing sitting down and sleeping with a hot water bottle sound alright to me. I'd sit down to pee regardless of what extras I had. Nice little rest.

Coughle · 12/10/2014 00:25

You call it "lady bits," he calls it "little guy." Each to their own.

Bogeyface · 12/10/2014 00:26

I wouldnt assume gay but I would think boarding school or mummy issues or both.

Shall we say that this is someone who has not have a healthy emotional childhood and leave it at that? Wink

Wrapdress · 12/10/2014 00:52

"Guy" in my neck of the woods can mean either man or woman - as in someone can say, "Come on you guys" and it can be a roomful of women. It's gender neutral.

MrBuscuits · 12/10/2014 01:25

OP, Guy is a gender neutral term, but the sitting to pee as a guy and teddies (I assume the bears, not the lingerie) shows 'tenancies'... I guess he's not one of the 'straight acting' ones... snoop on him (common MN advice Grin) and check his phone in case there's men he's seeing behind your back...

MrBuscuits · 12/10/2014 01:27

*Tendancies, stupid auto correct Grin

nooka · 12/10/2014 01:36

What tendencies does sitting to pee demonstrate? A liking for comfort? Poor balance?

Teddies in bed might be childish, but there was a thread a few days ago about childhood teddies and plenty of people said that they still liked having their favourite ted in bed. IS that only OK because they were mostly women?

I'd assume that liking a hot water bottle meant that they were cold in bed, perhaps because of poor circulation.

If you think that these three factors makes someone obviously gay then you have some pretty weird and probably homophobic ideas.

OldLadyKnowsSomething · 12/10/2014 01:38

In My Day the clitoris was sometimes known as the "man in a boat"... Going to bed with a teddy/teddies is unusual, as is sitting down to pee (but how much more hygenic!), but there's nowt wrong with a hot water bottle.

Meh, he's an ex, why do you even care?

minkah · 12/10/2014 01:45

You must be kidding. Sitting down to pee is just polite, loads of blokes do it unless in a public urinal.

Teddy stuff.. Who knows, I guess he's in touch with his inner child.

As for 'little guy'... That's a new one on me. Sounds a bit gauche.

Dirtybadger · 12/10/2014 02:01

How can someone "act straight", bar fucking someone of the opposite sex in front of their friends and family (and whoever else happens to be around)?

YonicScrewdriver · 12/10/2014 02:33

More borderline homophobia, Mr B?

MrBuscuits · 12/10/2014 05:17

This reply has been deleted

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Roonerspism · 12/10/2014 05:32

My DH always sits to pee at home. Says it is comfy.

I have never thought anything of it other than delight the seat isn't covered in piss.

off now to look for teddies

magpiegin · 12/10/2014 05:47

Having a teddy bear 'is gay behaviour'? Really? I'm guessing Mrsb that as you don't do political correctness that you're experience of homosexuality is what you read in tabloids? What a bizarre thing to say.

magpiegin · 12/10/2014 05:48

Sporty- typo. Mrb.

claraschu · 12/10/2014 06:00

I make my boys pee sitting down: no sprinkling around the toilet. Peeing standing up is why men's toilets smell the way they do.

DistanceCall · 12/10/2014 06:06

Someone has been watching Brideshead Revisited too many times, methinks (i.e. Aloysius, Sebastian Flyte's teddy bear).

LickleMiss · 12/10/2014 06:18

Why do you care - hes an ex!!!!!

Anniegetyourgun · 12/10/2014 08:40

read the thread title, and switch out of bitch mode for just a second. I don't do the whole political correctness thing

Well that's a surprise Hmm

saintlyjimjams · 12/10/2014 08:48

Is mrb for real? What a pile of homophobic crap. As for 'and switch out of bitch mode' - may I suggest you fuck off out of mumsnet if it's a little bit too modern for you mrb (pesky women not knowing their place any more).

Sitting down, teddies & hot water bottles are signs of being gay??? WTAF? I suppose you think all the gays are making it rain as well. I've honestly heard it all now.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 12/10/2014 08:52

Not a grown-up, but not gay. Did he live with parents until a late age?

VikingLady · 12/10/2014 08:57

DH sits down to pee at night or when he's tired. It saves cleaning when he misses!

He is very definitely straight.

rjay123 · 12/10/2014 08:58

I'm a bloke in my twenties and I sit down to pee when I'm at home.

I'm not gay. I don't have homosexual tendencies. I like to be able to play a quick game of candy crush in peace!

VikingLady · 12/10/2014 08:58

And he has a hot water bottle in winter. He's tight and it's cheaper than putting the heating on!

Notso · 12/10/2014 09:11

What the fuck!?!

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