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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

6 months in...are these normalish and I am being too picky?

145 replies

scrapingbottom · 12/11/2012 18:50

Hello All,

I read here alot, have name changed for this as slightly scared of answers

I have been seeing someone for just over 6 months, and for me we hit crunch time this week and I'm thinking of leaving, just wanted others opinion if possible.

All been ok, been on 2 long holidays etc and see every weekend however a week ago my mum who lives a long way away said she would be over at end of Dec and wanted to meet him, so I asked him, he lives half an hour away and said o might be too tired as its a monday, i got the message and said ok fine will tell her you are too busy. However was annoyed and all the things I am unsure about have reared their ugly head...

  1. He is incredibly tight, so much so that his friends take the mick, and hates going out

  2. he eats at his parents every night so as to save cooking and prefers me round latish so he can eat first, his mum also does all his washing and ironing..he is 50

  3. He farts now continually, didn't used to and thinks its hilarious

  4. Like some kind of tourette syndrome he keeps saying fcuking c@@t under his breath apropos of nothing when we are out??

  5. calls his boss female a slag and a c@@t and says she slept her way to top and wants him and i should be lucky he has morals??

  6. A bit shorter than me and I'm average height and wears huge built up shoes so he can hardly walk, I hate this, I don't care about the height

  7. obsessed with anal sex??? WTF

  8. Slightly controlling and bossy and hates me drinking or looking at other guys, I don't realise I have looked till he makes a comment, I'm normally just looking into space I think

  9. Ok just read these and they sound awful, he can be lovely, good company, and fun, but I'm getting irritated now hugely, yes been asked to meet his parents and I would never say o no too tired as its in week

Any ideas

OP posts:
MaMaPo · 12/11/2012 19:10

If nothing else, number 5 tells me this is horrible man who doesn't deserve to be in a relationship.

Get rid of him and find someone who doesn't hate, or at least devalue, women.

abitcoldupnorth · 12/11/2012 19:11

Any of those. Sorry.

SweetSeraphim · 12/11/2012 19:13

Any of those things would be enough to dump. I'm sorry OP, but without even knowing you, I KNOW you can do much better than this, and so do you.

lubeybooby · 12/11/2012 19:14

Everything but the farting is an URGENT dumpable offence.

Get rid NOW!!

insprognito · 12/11/2012 19:14

Its kind of hard to see why on earth you would want to be with this freak. Imo nothing could redeem all of that. Sorry but get rid pronto, you deserve better surely?

BelaLugosisShed · 12/11/2012 19:16

Did you seriously think that anyone on here would say yes, you are being picky?
Are you so desperate for a man in your life that even an appalling specimen like him is better than nothing?

OneMoreGo · 12/11/2012 19:16

PLEASE tell me this is a wind up?
I would bin him immediately.

doctordwt · 12/11/2012 19:17

Wow!

It's so bad it's hard to believe tbh.

Yes, I would have dumped him for most of the issues on your list just on their own. Two or more and I'd have literally run out of the door.

He sounds like a disgusting, offensive, lazy, selfish, unpleasant, cretinous, using pig.

Dump Grin

ThereGoesTheYear · 12/11/2012 19:17

He's got a full house of bad qualities, hasn't he? 5 and 8 are particularly disturbing. Run like the wind and don't feel like you have to justify your reasons to him or anyone else.

izzyizin · 12/11/2012 19:18

Holy Moly... you're asking if you're being too picky when you should be asking why you're not picky enough.

FFS ditch this twat pronto - pointing him in the direction of the door and setting light to one his farts should serve to speed the process, but don't hesitate to apply your boot to his arse and kick him into orbit around plant offufuck if the resulting flame doesn't do the job for you.

Seriously, honey... you'd want to introduce this moron to your dm? Have you no pride?

stuffitunderthebed · 12/11/2012 19:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

izzyizin · 12/11/2012 19:20

planet offufuck although an orbiting plant will provide a natural environment for a vegetable like him.

tschiffely · 12/11/2012 19:22

Even lurkers on mn know better than to stick around with sheisters like this. Run, block, delete!

scrapingbottom · 12/11/2012 19:24

izzy thank you i laughed! had a very very tough time recently so radar is not working

thanks all xx

OP posts:
hugoagogo · 12/11/2012 19:24

Oh my! You really need to get rid.

AvonCallingBarksdale · 12/11/2012 19:36

Oh my good lord! Run, OP, run for the hills. Do not look back, do not pass go, just get the rock out of there! Do you mind me asking if you are a similar age to him?

scrapingbottom · 12/11/2012 19:39

10 years younger!

OP posts:
WakeyCakey · 12/11/2012 19:42

3 words...

Leave the bastard!!
He sounds horrible and he doesn't deserve you. you can do better and better won't want to do you in the bum!
a total deal breaker for me Grin

ICanTuckMyBoobsInMyPockets · 12/11/2012 19:42

Mother of god.

I have never commented on anything in relationships before, but I am compelled.

You are dating the doppelgänger of my ex (except the age).

Dump him now. Do it. Go on. Report back when you're done.

I wonder how he got to this age and is still single when he's such a catch Grin

kissyfur · 12/11/2012 19:43

Jeez! I don't think you even need to ask with a list like that do you?! Run! And don't look back

ErikNorseman · 12/11/2012 19:43

I'm sorry but I'm questioning how you can even consider not dumping him. Where are your standards?

Guiltypleasures001 · 12/11/2012 19:46

I'm sorry but I have to ask, and ladies cover your ear now..

What he like in bed????

I have to know, he sounds like a characture off a 70's sitcom.

Guiltypleasures001 · 12/11/2012 19:47

ears ffs

scrapingbottom · 12/11/2012 19:50

Um hes ok in bed, takes forever I think he might look at porn I don't know, insists on using sex toys all the time

WTF am I doing with him

OP posts:
HotDAMNlifeisgood · 12/11/2012 19:50

Oh love. Dump him, and then re-set your radar. NO woman should be touching this man with a bargepole, and certainly not someone as lovely-sounding as you.