Archers thread #146: They did fall apart. Can they put themselves together again? Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you'd like to donate your time as a guide at Lower Loxley to save the Pargetters paying someone else a living wage, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to @Impostersyndrome for the thread title suggestion Buses and trains are sorely lacking, canals might be nearby, but all roads lead to Ambridge, picking up on transport discussions in the last thread. In the end I didn't use it, having in mind the character limit. @TottersBlankly contributed an early draft title Wreathes, wrath, writhing (Jennifer, Lilian, Ruairi). Both good starting points for the new thread, which I hope will last till Jennifer's funeral, surely not too far off now. So, over to you - whither the Aldridges? Also, does anyone care if Lee goes to the US? Is anyone even slightly interested in the Brookfield B&B venture?

Probably still wearing band t shirts from the 90s.

OI! i resemble that remark!

Jolene as the Geena Davis lady pirate, all long wild curls and clevage

Jim owns his own house.

but he lives with Alastair

I'm also thinking Paul for the room. But i am cross about the trying to force Lily to agree to her brother. She SAID she wants to get away from him spefically. Josh is an arse

This gave me an instant flashback to the 80s. I imagine Jenny Darling (and those of us of a certain age, cough) probably used to refer to it as 'Keep Fit', the precursor to aerobics.

All that time Josh has been on his own at the stables and suddenly needs the room filled by Friday 🙄

I loved aerobics in the 80s.

He's afraid his honour will be compromised unless there's a chaperone, cousin or not.

When did Neil and Susan go on a holiday.
I've known plenty of fat farmers. They might have had strong muscles but they were fat.

Harrison dresses in those shirts that are slightly too tight on nights out. He always smells nice and has one of those very clean jawlines this is exactly how I picture Harrison. I've just realised I'd completely forgotten about Johnny - has he gone away or is he trapped in a cupboard somewhere? I feel a bit sorry for Josh who wanted Freddie, but has got Lily who is already trying to rule the roost.

I'd hate sharing with Lily.
Not sure how Johnny and Rex could be confused, their accents and voices are quite different.

Jim owns his own house.
but he lives with Alastair

So Alastair should be the one to move out.

if he's desperate enough... (it's tongue in cheek)

I really dislike Lily. Poor Josh.

I think Susan was a Great Beauty when she was younger and is pretty vain. I think Emma inherited her good looks. If they were American, in her youth Susan would have been a local beauty Queen, head cheerleader, homecoming queen, all the Hollywood cliches. And she would have pushed Emma to be the same. Susan will HATE the window and the fact that everyone will see her in her hairnet and white hat!

Emma was the Strawberry Princess! (or maybe Queen).

After the E Coli incident some years ago, I would have residual concerns about hygiene in the dairy and would find my eyes constantly lingering on the handwashing.

I always pictured Jennifer as slim and taller than average. Impeccable hair, make up, clothes, shoes, bag - all very expensive and brands the MN S&B regulars would recognise. (I wouldn't. I find S&B terrifying.) Lilian would be similar but flashier and almost certainly blonde with highlights. Probably curvier too.

Emma is slim and dark. Very pretty in her teens and 20s, but now has a habitual discontented expression and frown lines. Can't afford to spend much on clothes etc and minds that very much indeed. Very slim, as she has so much to do and is conscious and proud of her figure.

Susan is small and has a terrific figure.

Lily is blond and waif like. Freddie similar. Pip, Helen and Kate are all brunette.

I agree - why on Earth has Josh allowed himself to be railroaded like that! I mean did Lily really think he'd like to live with a shopping influencer?

I’m often a disappointment 😊

I think Lizzy has curly brown hair, in ringlets. Lily has long wavy brown hair in a "posh girl mane". Freddie has brown hair in curtains which always look uncool and untidy.

Everyone is mousy. And Freddie is going bald. 😈

Kate is blonde
Alice is dark haired
Adam was mousy brown/dirty blonde but is now grey
Ruari is dark haired and slightly elfin like
Lillian chain smokes to keep thin
Jenny was about 5 foot 4- size 12 and non descript.
Susan is dark haired- slightly stout but not fat. A bit square from a distance. Slight wave so a bit like a 1970s perm- think Patricia Hodge hair but dark
Emma is dark haired
Ed is blonde
Freddie is ginger aka prince harry
Lily is dark but dyed blonde- long hair that goes up.
Brian is like David Horton in the vicar of dibley but fatter

I haven't thought about this at all!

Fallon is the tallest woman and dark haired
Harrison is Mr Bean

🤔There was so much reluctance expressed tonight regarding Noluthando’s return to SA. And it sounds as if she’s found something exciting at LL.

Might she possibly stay? (And move into The Stables?)

Yes I'm think Noli is settling in. No fixed abode and the Job Fairy will probably create an opening for her in the UK. (Visas???)

Brine and Kate was lovely.

You can hold dual citizenship I believe

JennyDarling and Mary Berry were separated at birth in my opinion. Impeccable make-up and beautiful, expensive clothes that fit perfectly.

From Gov.UK

Born in the UK between 2 October 2000 and 29 April 2006
^^
Whether you’re a British citizen depends on where your parents were from and their circumstances. There are different rules if when you were born:
^^
at least one of your parents was a British or Irish citizen
at least one of your parents was a citizen of an EU or EEA country
neither of your parents was a British, Irish, EU or EEA citizen
You’re automatically a British citizen if you were adopted by a British citizen in a UK court.
If at least one of your parents was a British or Irish citizen when you were born
^^
You’ll be a British citizen if when you were born at least one of your parents was either:
^^
a British citizen
an Irish citizen living in the UK
If the parent that meets these conditions is your father, he must have been married to your mother when you were born.

————
Noluthando was born in January 2001.

www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/profiles/3xTPRGQ5zCQHDxbXNCgMMnq/noluthando-madikane

I’m assuming Kate did not relinquish her British citizenship when she married Lucas?

I’m not sure anyone could honestly describe her as of ‘no fixed abode’. In both SA and the UK she has a home with the relevant parent.