The Cheese Queen needs to tread Caerphilly. Camembert the tension? Join The Archers thread and hope it gets Feta from here on.

[PseudoBadger]

Sorry but I couldn't resist an opportunity for puns galore

Stop being so highbrow you lot, and get back on topic !

As this thread looks like it's going to be full by the end of tomorrow, it would be a shame to waste the cheesy potential of the thread title. So, in best I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue fashion, can you name musicals that would be popular with dairy-lovers?

I've mined some from the 1950s:

Okhalloumi!

Gruyeres and Dolls

A Funny Thing Happened on the Whey to the Forum

The King and Ayibe [thanks to Wikipedia for the obscure Ethiopian cheese!]

Lynda is going to do the Story of The Great Ambridge Flood isn't she? Or a series of monologues about how people have been affected

Chevresel (Carousel)

No daddad i've got to clear out my utility room and I'm wasting time!!!!

Wasn't Jim supposed to be putting together some sort of oral history of the flood? Don't recall the purpose - but I think Kenton suggested him because he didn't want "Dave" doing it.

Anyway, whatever show they select, on the opening night at the exact moment when a dog is supposed to run on to stage - Scruff will appear.

I assumed as Lynda was having her lightbulb moment that she was thinking of Our Town, but could that be done without the American setting/accents? Although that might be better than attempting them...

Also, did last year set the precedent for the play-within-a-play thing, so that they can broadcast it in the R4 drama slot over Christmas?

Wizard of Oz! With Scruff returning as Toto. And Rob as the tiny little man who thinks he's all-powerful until the curtain is pulled back.

Cheesus Christ Superstar?

Um… We Will Roque(fort) You?

"Rob as the tiny little man who thinks he's all-powerful until the curtain is pulled back" - Yes!

Would Carol be the good witch or the wicked witch?

Carol could play both, just to keep us guessing, and just so they can get a little more mileage out of the ambiguity surrounding her

Brie Will Rock You

Les Mozzarella-balls

I always envisaged Scruff as a Toto type dog.

Missed last night's and will miss the afternoon one but I'm delighted Charlie's surfaced again. I've been wondering how Berrow Farm has been getting along without Rob. has Charlie unearthed anything?

We did a definitive list of people with cause to suspect Rob of evil-doing on the last thread. IIRC it was roughly half the village!

There will be an incident at the hunt but I don't think it will be the obvious accident type of incident. Perhaps the hunt sabs will be out in force and Rob will lose his temper very publicly.

42nd Strings

Rob has to die. It's the only way Helen can be acceptably extricated from this mess.

Loving the puns.

ppeat - surely a physical activity like tidying a room is the perfect opportunity for your brain to be thinking about puns...

Gruyères and Dolls

Man of La Manchego.
Bugsy Mahon (featuring Al Mascarpone)

oops. Just noticed that D^3 set this off with Gruyères and Dolls.

Red Leicester Side Story?
Although enough of the musicals, is Helen brieding Rob's spawn or not? Is she pulling his cheese strings or is the other way round?

And does anyone else find the annual SL of Lynda putting on a show/not putting on a show incredibly tedious? And why does she never give it the slightest thought before September - surely she'd be planning it year round (and preferably keeping quiet about it)

I don't think she is pregnant.
Perhaps when she gets her period she will just pretend it's an early miscarriage ?

Alternative story line, she is pg but there is something wrong with the baby, and Robs reaction to that.....

Crazy for Ewe ('s milk cheese)

Rob has to die. It's the only way Helen can be acceptably extricated from this mess.

Nooooooooooo. I want him to be comprehensively humiliated, with all, and I mean all, his crimes coming to light and PC Plot triumphantly carting him off to prison for flooding the village, killing Freda and Scruff, assaulting the hunt monitor, and plenty more. Hellin can vindicate herself and regain control by giving evidence against him.

He can die after that, of course.

Bloodthirsty and over-infested? Who, me?

Mama Brie-a

I was in Noye's Fludde at school - I was Mrs Ham. I remember nothing else about it except rather a lot of Kyrie Eleisons.

Anyway, I digress. Just LA - wtf is Pip going on about with her sniffy missing granny heather at her graduation? Did she go and see HP when she was ill? No. Did she go and visit her when she wasn't ill? No. The only time HP's grandchildren seem to have given a shiny shit about her is when one of their parents mention her. Otherwise, she's forgotten unless they're running low on marmalade.

Really irritating.

DH gave a big sigh last night and said 'oh no, it's the Christmas show storyline again'.

He detests the Archers, but knows all the main characters and stories because I've ground him down.