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Original poster

repremanded for not believing in god

92 replies

Unagray · 15/12/2017 06:40

Today my son was sternly repremanded for telling his teacher he did not believe in god. He told me he thought it was important she knew and was deeply upset from her reaction! I am utterly furious! What are my rights here? Surely this is unacceptable? I am trying to handle this rationally but I am seething. Added note... school is not C of E... but does have whole school worship.. (national curriculum?)

OP posts:
GoldenWondering · 15/12/2017 06:44

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AuntLydia · 15/12/2017 06:49

Well the first thing I'd do is calm down and speak to the teacher to find out her side of the story. I mean, when you say 'sternly reprimanded' what did she actually say? I'm atheist and my kids don't believe in God either...it bugs me that religion is sometimes taught as fact in even non faith schools BUT it's very important to me that my kids are respectful of others beliefs. Being sternly reprimanded for saying they don't believe in God seems very odd to me and I would be wondering whether they had been (perhaps inadvertently) disrespectful.

user789653241 · 15/12/2017 06:50

How old is he, and what and how did he say, in what sort of situation?
I think it really depend on how he worded and context of his thought, and how the teacher responded to it.

Strictly1 · 15/12/2017 06:51

I would get all of the information first; I’d be very surprised it was exactly as you describe. All have the right to their own beliefs.

BertrandRussell · 15/12/2017 06:56

What was the context? What does he say he said?

BertrandRussell · 15/12/2017 06:58

And it's no use being seething and furious till you know what happened.

Original poster
Unagray · 15/12/2017 07:39

Thanks for the responses! So... he told me this last night.. he was very upset. It apparently happened after my son’s Nativity performance. I think he just told her. He felt it was important she knew that about him. ( back story... we have recently moved. This is a new school. My boys have attended for nearly 3 weeks now) I have always been very open with my kids about my beliefs or lack of them. They understand they have to learn about religion, the diversity and politics surrounding it. I really want to handle this with a level head and not go in all guns blazing... it has very much upset me though. My son is a typical 7 yr old... crazy and disruptive at times but also thoughtful and respectful. I cannot imagine him saying this for any other reason than the one he gave me.

OP posts:
BertrandRussell · 15/12/2017 07:41

OK-you need to ask the teacher about it-can you do that this morning?

user789653241 · 15/12/2017 07:58

Thing is, 7 year old's version of event maybe different from the teacher's.
It really depend on how he said, and in what kind of situation, was he surrounded by other children, etc, etc.
You need to speak to the teacher before getting upset.

Eolian · 15/12/2017 08:01

If your son's version of events is accurate, I'd be absolutely livid and tell the teacher so.

Helena17 · 15/12/2017 08:04

I don't think it helps to reprimand a child for an opinion more so belief. It the teacher acted with some sense of professionalism he/she should have explained more so inspire his pupils or at the least just inform his/her stand on things like that.

WooWooSister · 15/12/2017 08:06

Speak to the teacher. There are many ways, times and places that it would inappropriate to announce your beliefs, especially in the context of a nativity and when a 7-yr-old is deciding it's important a teacher 'knows' something.

LaurieFairyCake · 15/12/2017 08:07

What does 'sternly reprimanded' mean?

Do you know what she said?

prh47bridge · 15/12/2017 08:11

You don't have any rights as such in this situation. You can, of course, make a complaint about the teacher. But the first thing is to establish what really happened. Your son's version of events may not be accurate or may be missing important information. I'm not saying he is deliberately twisting things, just that there may be details that were not important to him but which put the incident in a different light.

Twofishfingers · 15/12/2017 08:12

I would be very curious to hear the teacher's version.

Crumbs1 · 15/12/2017 08:14

Crazy and disruptive......does that also mean gauche and rude? How did he tell the teacher? I’d hear the other version before getting upset.

IfyouseeRitaMoreno · 15/12/2017 08:16

I can believe this. In my son’s school they are not allowed to question the validity of the religions they are taught. I would speak to the teacher about it and find out exactly what she said though.

ItStartedWithAKiss241 · 15/12/2017 08:16

We do believe in God and whilst my children know not everyone does I view this as if your son did not believe in Santa and announced it across the classroom. I suspect most people disagree but just so you can understand teachers point of view before the discussion on how she could have handled it better x

Original poster
Unagray · 15/12/2017 08:20

WooWooSister.. yes absolutely.. totally agree. I accept it’s a stressful time for teachers.. cannot imagine trying to conduct ‘navtity’ with 30+ kids in front of their parents! (Shuddering) I’ve questioned him a bit more... so, the teacher apparently was talking to the kids after their performance about the importance of belief... my son says he then piped up about his lack of belief ( he actually said ‘mummy, I might of said “I hate god”’)So I think I understand her reaction a little better. Obviously he was being disrespectful by saying this. I need to talk to his teacher. Thanks everyone x

OP posts:
BarbarianMum · 15/12/2017 08:30

Yes check the wording he used. Ds2 is an ardent atheist and had to be sternly discouraged from spelling out how stupid and illogical he found the whole Christianity business at that age (he'd not had enough exposure to other religions to form an opinion then).

BertrandRussell · 15/12/2017 08:36

He shouldn't have said "I hate God".

She shouldn't have been talking about the importance of belief.

But get the other side of the story before you take things further with him or her.

C8H10N4O2 · 15/12/2017 09:41

talking to the kids after their performance about the importance of belief

The importance of personal belief or the importance of peoples' beliefs (as in to them)?

Two entirely different constructs.

"I hate God" isn't just rude, its actually irrational if you don't believe.

sirfredfredgeorge · 15/12/2017 10:00

Nothing irrational about saying "I hate god", not believing in something doesn't mean you cannot hate it, indeed it's better to hate something you don't believe is real.

I hate unicorns, they infect all sorts of other wise normal reasonable things with their sparkly crap. I do know that they aren't actually real though.

But yes, it is very rude, although in the context of a discussion of the importance of belief to some people, it is not something to be severely reprimanded over but to be used as the illustration of why saying that is more often thought of as bad than the "I hate unicorns", which in a 7 year old class may actually be more unpopular.

C8H10N4O2 · 15/12/2017 10:02

I hate unicorns, they infect all sorts of other wise normal reasonable things with their sparkly crap

But then you hate all the sparkly crap and nonsense around it. Not non existent unicorns.

sirfredfredgeorge · 15/12/2017 10:13

But then you hate all the sparkly crap and nonsense around it. Not non existent unicorns.

But like god, it's a lot easier to say I hate unicorns, than to say I hate the system that has created designers to add unicorns to any item of clothing/material designed for 5 year old girls, forcing out the options without unicorns due to shops only able to stock minimal levels etc.

Just like it's easier to say I hate god, than it is to say, I hate the way god as a belief construct allows people to perform actions that are immoral or hurtful just because they have a personal belief in a god that allows disassociation of thought, their god saying X is bad, removes them from the process. And it's certainly easier to say in a 5 year olds vocabulary, especially as it's likely they are just using god as their term for organised religion, not having developed the distinctions.