OMG I have only just found this. I have been crying with laughter for the last ten minutes. It began with the telephone conversation picturing the cominc stepping towards the phone of the gaggle of teachers as ds utters 'but you know we shouldn't lie mummy', was worse imagining the pants being thrown round the dinner hall. Then I calmed a little until the 'at home' chat then was inconsolable with the chat with the teacher!!!
Doodle's pubes in the wedding poppers just finished me off. And then when Suzanne Mole was mentioned (who, incidently, I have beaten in many a dance competition as a child), I got a little bit of sick in my mouth from laughing so much.
Thanks - really needed a good laugh!