Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mumsnet classics

Relive the funniest, most unforgettable threads. For a daily dose of Mumsnet’s best bits, sign up for Mumsnet's daily newsletter.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

AIBU to ask you to talk me out of cancelling this date tonight?

291 replies

Posypointshoes · 17/04/2023 18:28

I’ve name changed for this because the background is incredibly outing.

I have a date tonight with someone I’ve liked for YEARS but I am absolutely bricking it.

We knew each other as children, we used to dance together. We did ballroom and competed so spent a LOT of time together and were very close, stayed close during our teens, then we went to separate universities and stayed in touch.

we had a falling out when I stopped dancing and he wanted to continue and didn’t speak for several years, then got talking again - by which point we were both married to other people. We stayed very loosely in touch but not close like we used to be.

neither marriage worked out - nothing to do with each other.

We’ve been talking again, and he asked me out on a date/for a drink tonight and I’ve been really looking forward to it as I really like him.

the thing is I haven’t seen him for ages. I was always in amazing shape from dancing when I was younger, but while not in bad nick I’m not like I used to be. I feel old! And like I have nothing interesting to say. I’ve lost all my confidence and I’m worried I’ve built him up in my head over the years to be something he’s not.

i don’t know what’s wrong with me, I really like him. But I also just want to stay at home!!

OP posts:
Anawi · 17/04/2023 23:35

Posypointshoes · 17/04/2023 23:24

Oh gawd didn’t expect this many replies! It’s going well 😳

I stumbled across this post at a good time to see your update! 🤣🙂 glad it's going well, how lovely. X

herlightmaterials · 17/04/2023 23:37

I do hope it's going very very well!

deltablue · 17/04/2023 23:47

Keep us posted!

Dancingqueenwannabe · 17/04/2023 23:48

Hope it's going well and he is everything you remember him to be xx

Original poster
Posypointshoes · 17/04/2023 23:51

I’m usually rubbish at updating threads but I just wanted to say thank you for all the reassurance and good advice earlier! I took it and told myself it was just a catch up and it made it much easier to walk into the pub at the start (it was definitely a date though so I needn’t have worried about misinterpreting!).

Had an amazing night, it just clicked back to how it used to be, was so easy and neither one of us could believe how quickly the time flew by. He’s just as gorgeous and funny and lovely as he always was - and while neither one of us are the same as we were obviously, it felt like we were if you see what I mean. I’m waffling.

i can relate so much to the poster who said about being scarlet and giggly (I can’t remember the name and haven’t had a chance to read all the replies) because that’s how I feel now, back at home.

We are seeing each other again on Thursday night 😃and I am so glad I didn’t bottle it! I felt like such an idiot posting earlier and sort of still feel like an idiot posting this, but it was actually a huge nerve-calming help.

OP posts:
SarahDippity · 17/04/2023 23:52

How lovely! Update on Friday please!

Dibbydoos · 17/04/2023 23:55

So how did it go???

TreadLightly3 · 18/04/2023 00:20

Popcorn ready for your next date! Keep us updated!

Trudij123 · 18/04/2023 00:33

Awww!! Does he know he’s actually dating all of us? 😁

Morestrangerthings · 18/04/2023 00:53

I came to this thread too late to encourage you OP, but felt happy for you when I read your update about the date.

JudgeRudy · 18/04/2023 01:03

lala2023 · 17/04/2023 18:30

Please go

I need to live vicariously through you !

Oh yes. We want updates.
Tango into the night !

Mamanyt · 18/04/2023 01:13

And you have learned something so very valuable. Our fears are almost always worse than the reality. Almost. Sounds like you had a lovely time, but do tell more!

AllIeveknewonlyou · 18/04/2023 01:25

And to think the most exciting moment of my life tonight was suddenly waking up from a catnap at 9.40pm and feeling hungry so abruptly located keys and purse and ran off to get a wrap before the supermarket closed 😁

Date sounds good.

SpidersAreShitheads · 18/04/2023 01:27

Genuinely delighted for you OP.

I bet if you could view yourself through his eyes you'd see yourself in a completely different light. We're often so critical of ourselves. You sound lovely.

But yes, please do come back and update!! I love a thread where there's a chance of a happy outcome 😊

JMSA · 18/04/2023 01:30

Read your update with a soppy grin on my face. Well done OP - really pleased for you!

BlackFlyChardonnay · 18/04/2023 01:42

Loving this thread ❤️ shall I buy a hat?

ScottBakula · 18/04/2023 01:43

I am so glad your date went well .
What are the plans for Thursday?

Mummyoflittledragon · 18/04/2023 02:39

I’ve just found your thread. How lovely!

strawberryicecreamice · 18/04/2023 04:46

Great news OP happy for you

user1492757084 · 18/04/2023 04:57

Well done you!!! Best of luck for happy days.

Stripeybluetop · 18/04/2023 05:43

Awww this is lovely 😍

Jellifulfruit · 18/04/2023 05:48

Aw yay 🥰😍

Wavinggoodbyetoo · 18/04/2023 06:42

That’s great OP

Inthebathagain · 18/04/2023 06:49

Loved your update. Properly made me smile.

You will update again on Thursday, won't you?

LiliLil · 18/04/2023 06:50

Ahh well done for going OP, and I’m so happy to read your update! How exciting!

Have the best time on Thursday, and be kinder to yourself please - you sound lovely and he obviously thinks so too x

Swipe left for the next trending thread