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to share the things my BIL has moaned about whilst staying at our house for the past 3 days?

629 replies

BanKittenHeels · 15/09/2019 15:50

Amazon Prime Video doesn’t have the new Quentin Tarantino film that has just come out at the cinema. Ergo Amazon Prime is a waste of money.

The shower screen in the guest bathroom has a stationary rather than hinged shower screen.

That someone used the loo in the middle of the night and he could hear them flush - his bedroom door was 3/4 open.

We have stair gates, so our children don’t break their necks. “Really inconvenient”

The Thai restaurant sent us too many prawn crackers. They sent an appropriate amount for the number of people, actually.

My deodorant is blue. And what?

We don’t have an endless supply of spare clothes in his size and to his taste.

His hair was still in the shower in his en suite when he went back to use it the next day.

The towels I put out for him are white.

Our front gate is too squeaky.

The planes overhead are too low.

We have too many rugs.

He can hear traffic when in the garden.

Our dogs won’t cuddle him.

Our children wear shorts.

The settings of the seats in the car we lent him weren’t to his liking.

He doesn’t like the preset radio stations on our car radio.

My DH (his brother) “doesn’t wear a hat”??????

We don’t have his very specific music taste available to him on vinyl, although we did think to search out appropriate Spotify playlists for him but “that’s not quite the same authenticity”.

The local swimming pool (in a large city) keeps “provincial, British hours”.

Microwave steamers are “excessive gadgets”. Then 30 minutes later, “I suppose you could steam veg in your steamer, have you thought of that?” No shit!

None of the 3 duvets we offered him were suitable.

I use my inhaler too frequently.

Why do I have rosehip oil in the bathroom, it’s of no use to anyone.

Confused HmmAngry

OP posts:
iklboo · 16/09/2019 18:48

You HAVE to get him a ' Live, Love, Laugh' bit of tattery as a goodbye present!

Tinkerbelle57 · 16/09/2019 18:50

How often does he come?
Does his wife send him over to you because he annoys her?
I’d just say to him “if you don’t like it, piss off home”

TatianaLarina · 16/09/2019 18:51

Roses are red
My deodorant is blue
Quit whining you cockwomble
Or you’ll sleep at the zoo.

timeforawine · 16/09/2019 18:53

I'm having a new patio soon.....

Choufleur · 16/09/2019 18:56

I threw step fil’s dinner away years ago when he complained that everything was cooked wrong. He hasn’t complained about my cooking - to my face at least - since. Maybe you need a tougher approach op

ShmooBooMoo · 16/09/2019 19:05

I can't believe he expects some one else to remove his hair from the shower - disgusting!
I would politely suggest he stay in a hotel next time...if there is one!

Buttybach · 16/09/2019 19:10

You should blast "negative nancy" by Adore Delano over and over again until he cracks and vows to never be negative again!

Hangingwithmygnomies · 16/09/2019 19:12

If it helps OP I have a freshly dug VERY large hole in my garden right now courtesy of the water supplier and a burst pipe but we'll need to move quick as due to be filled in sometime in the next couple of days Grin

Bleen · 16/09/2019 19:14

My god I would just tell him to leave in fact I would pack his case and put it outside the front door. Please please tell your husband to have a very stern word with him. Don’t let him invite himself again

shinynewapple · 16/09/2019 19:26

If you are anywhere in the Midlands and need an hour or so's break I think he would get on really well with my FIL!

MadeleineMaxwell · 16/09/2019 19:29

You could always print this out for him. But you'd probably only have used the wrong type of paper. A lovely set of placemats, maybe?

to share the things my BIL has moaned about whilst staying at our house for the past 3 days?
sussexman · 16/09/2019 19:33

OP I believe he owes you a return visit. This is something you should do. Enthusiastically and creatively.

Damsel · 16/09/2019 19:35

OP I am full of admiration for your attitude towards him!

It’s fascinating to think that he clearly sees nothing wrong with these endless complaints & ridiculous criticisms & he has decided to live his life through the lens of negativity.

I am trying to work out why anyone ever agreed to be his wife? Or is he not like this at home?

I’m imagining different life scenarios. Do he & his wife have friends? How does he get on in work? Is he in a role where people have to report to him & all they get is negative feedback? If he has children, I’m trying to imagine when one of them brings a boyfriend or girlfriend home to meet him. Would they start running for the hills rather than contemplate a life ahead with him as a FIL.

MrsBadcrumble123 · 16/09/2019 19:35

And you’re letting him stay because...?

sophe · 16/09/2019 19:37

Sounds like a typical guest. Why on earth do people suffer these home invasions?

Fowles94 · 16/09/2019 19:38

I'd see if the ambulance and his hospital room were to his liking after I hit him with the steamer 🙈

Mummyoflittledragon · 16/09/2019 19:47

This Guy has a wife? Seriously? I bet if you cut her open she is full of wires and circuit boards.

Grin

Is this your sil??

Billben · 16/09/2019 19:48

His hair was still in the shower in his en suite when he went back to use it the next day.

This is the bit that would have made me reach for the pillow to smother him with.

PhilSwagielka · 16/09/2019 19:50

The dogs know what's up.

SugaredSocks · 16/09/2019 19:58

Sorry your going through a family crisis but roll on Friday I can't wait to hear more.

ThistleTits · 16/09/2019 20:15

Is he on home leave from a "hospital"?

AcrossthePond55 · 16/09/2019 20:19

Oooh, play Pollyanna's 'Glad Game'. Every time he moans, reply with "But be glad "

My deodorant is blue.
"Be glad blue deodorant doesn't leave marks"

The planes overhead are too low.
"Be glad they stay up!"

Our dogs won’t cuddle him.
"Be glad they don't shed on you"

My DH (his brother) “doesn’t wear a hat
"Be glad he has hair and doesn't need a hat" (assuming DH does have hair!)

It'll drive him bonkers with your constant optimism!

HerRoyalFattyness · 16/09/2019 20:25

This thread is amazing Grin

FWIW, I'm curious to know how it would feel to murder someone (and get away with it of course) so if you lot all promise me that I won't go to prison, I will do the deed for you bankittenheels

Teacher22 · 16/09/2019 20:34

But come on, too many prawn crackers, that’s harsh.

HerRoyalFattyness · 16/09/2019 20:36

And it has just occurred to me how psychotic my last post sounds!
I promise I'm fairly normal IRL