Read the Damn Post! AIBU

[HairsprayBabe]

This really gets my goat and I probably need to chill the fuck out but I find it so annoying!

Someone will post an AIBU e.g.
DD (9) has done X,Y & Z, I think she is old enough to know better DH disagrees and she is just a kid still WIBU?

Followed by a flood of posters - How old is DD? What age is your daughter? etc....

Sometimes the answer to the question is in the thread title FGS [facepalm]

Some threads are long, I get that but at least read the blinking OP before responding! AIBU and this is something I shouldn't care about?

I don't understand: why can't you make a simple lemon posset, and some shortbread to go with? Nobody can be that busy, surely

Sorry, wrong thread ^

And that's why you should never click a link whilst on the Daily Fail

• you might end up embarrassing yourself on mumsnet

I think this is all a passive aggressive stealth boast because the OP has a Nanny.

I'm sorry OP. I gave up reading your first post because there were no paragraphs. How do you expect anyone to offer advice if they have to read this gobbledygook?

Haven't RTFT but have you thought of hiring a cleaner and booking a spa day?

Perhaps take in some ironing?

Ridiculous drip-feeding regarding the cake. Can't believe the troll OP didn't mention it to begin with. I know troll hunting is banned but trip trap...

This happened to my goat.

Have you taught the goat to drive? It's a life skill don't you know.

It's possible a pp did suggest it but I didn't RTFT so I'm not sure and tbh my post would be waaaaaay more important than theirs anyway.

I have reported the troll hunting, personal attacks and accusations of sock puppeting, also shoplifting, arson, and philandering, which have been rife on this thread!

OP, in the gentlest possible way, I think you need to ask the goat to read this thread.

So sorry jsut thought you would all appreciate an update,

DH is not having EA with DGoat as he is a porn addict.

DD is nine and can't read but can tell you how old she is in months, an excellent outcome of our unschooling process, OFSTED are very happy with us. She still only eats hummus.

Vegan DGoat just parked helicopter on MIL's neighbours drive as at family bbq someone accidentally tried to feed Xer a vegan gluten free hotdog, but had crumbled feta on the top! So embarrassing!

We think DGoat may be obese as we cannot see her ribs, and that is a sure sign of obesity in goats, so we are going low carb with her now - sugar is the devil and we think it may have caused all the issues in the first place.

If that fails we can try counselling, but getting a referal to GoatASheepMS is a nightmare.

Jaysus, is it so difficult to RTFT?!

Nowhere in OP's post does it say she has a goat. I repeat OP DOES NOT OWN A GOAT!!!! DG clearly stands for Deadly Geranium!

While all you vulva's cunt is beneath me fill the thread with your fuckwittery poor OP has obviously been poisoned by DG hence why she hasn't returned!

Clearly there's not enough !'s !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*GoatSheepMHS even

Your DD is clearly entitled, your know there is a hummus shortage and people are suffering.

Haven't RTFT but your poor goat time to put your big girl pants on and put DG first OP. You're meant to be an adult here. Tell MIL to sod off and LTB too!

If you insist on using a toilet brush then you only have yourself to blame. That's how ebola started - from using a toilet brush. HTH

Your Dear Goat has phoned me and made it very clear that you have failed to cancel the cheque and are ignoring the goats macrobiotic cave-goat no grass diet.

You don't deserve to have a goat. Tut tut. Shakes head. Sighs.

I sincerely hope it was a rescue goat?

Buying goats from irresponsible goat owners is the cause of all evil. All goats should be sterilised.

I can tell you defiantly that what your DGoat needs is a blood test for The Levels.Insist your Dr does this in the next 15 mins.
Sometimes Drs try to fob you off with something they refer to as their 'medical training', but don't stand for this. It was true for me, so no other diagnosis is possible.
If no joy in 20 mins, order an ambulance from 111, and get DGoat to A and E. This is essential, because
Dr Google has told me about something awful that D Goat has no symptoms of, so you literally can't be too careful.

(Disclaimer: goats only:if the sensible wing of MN is ever fairly unanimous you need A and E then really, listen )

If they are no good in A&E within the first 30 seconds should I call PALS?

Have you considered that giving giving them 30seconds may be leaving it too late? Because this happened to DSil's DM's cleaner.

Tbh the triage nurse in A&E is often not the brightest, and will be grateful for you stepping in to help sort the patients out. That medical priority stuff, so inappropriate for our organic goats.
Good luck