For the first time ever DH & DS went off to do the xmas food shop......I am still laughing...

[Megglevache]

...his parting words
"don't look worried Mrs MLV...I got this"

he spent almost £300

he bought amoungst other things
12 pack of kitchen roll
24 luxury toilet rolls- the type that are about 12 tog and will block up our feeble pipes
A partridge
8 different olives
Masses and masses of lemon jelly???
Premier Champagne (he's teetotal) I drink Cava
Popcorn (with sour cream and chives Heresy
the whole biscuit aisle
a farking Heston Blumenthrill cake (£25!!!???)
a crate of festive cheeses
8lb gammon
salmon
bike helmet
fancy bubble bath
posh candles (that smell)

Please share with me tales of bizarre shopping to take off the edge..

PS.. I am still laughing every time I open up the fridge...(which has hardly anything in it)

[ZillionChocolate]

I have a special Christmas shopping list on my phone. Just need to copy and paste this lot ready for next year.

[ChristabelChristmas]

So funny! If I ever send DH out to the shops he usually forgets or loses the list. When he comes back he puts the bags down and says "I panicked". We then usually get similar results to you! I once sent him out to get milk and eggs and he came back with a Playstation and AutoCar magazine.

[ouryve]

Are all those olives gone, yet, Megg? Some of them will be getting close to their use by dates :o

[Megglevache]

I know it's not a funny xmas list but I had to share.
Dh just came from the shop ..strict instructions to grit ham. nice but not tumbled in lavender or anything.

he came back with a bright yellow kettle, three pacakets of tea cakes, fancy apples and 8 tubes of youth paste because Collgate were on offer. No ham.

[dashoflime]

Not Christmas related but DH once went to TESCO with our last tenner and came back with:

Dried worms
A Carafe (nothing in it-just a carafe)

[dashoflime]

where can I get Youthpaste?

[Megglevache]

dash....they sell worms in tesco ?

[dashoflime]

Yep: dried worms in packets, for garden birds

[MsWino]

loving this thread.
Have just joined mn and spent ages reading this. I have been giggling away to myself for ages. My DS is in bed ill & keeps shouting down to me "whatya laffing at now !!" lol

Still trying to find my way around here. Can anyone tell me how I can see the pics please?

[Flossiechops]

mswino if you fancy a laugh you must head over to mumsnet classics, it's where all the best threads go. It's under 'site stuff', I was literally roaring with laughter at some of the posts!! You can only see pics by clicking on a users name and that's only if they have a profile!

[Flossiechops]

Bollox this thread is in classics!! Sorry I didn't realize !

[MsWino]

Thanks Flossiechops. I only found classics as I was reading another thread that linked to it.

I seem to get the horrible feeling that I will be spending too much time on here and never get any housework done from now on ..... though I never got much done before..

I presume megglevache has changed her profile then as I cant click on the username. Never mind, I will have to imagine what it all looked like.

[MsWino]

Wow, I have even managed a smiley

[Flossiechops]

I know I've been on here a few years now and my house is a pig stye

[widowerbutok]

Thank you OP... I have not laughed out loud like this for ages. Far too near the truth when it comes to being sent out for 'shopping.' "thought it was bubble bath" almost on the floor laughing!!!
ps I have a list printed off of a Word file these days, but still come back with something I don't need as I was sure the list was wrong...duh

Again..ty..x

[etinox]

I had the saved in my calendar to bump, as it was so funny first time round.