Anyone facing infertility 40+ part 3

[Woodcottage1]

Just continuing from the previous thread

Best of luck @Pinklady81. @LouScot has said it, try to rest and try not to beat yourself up about this. If possible stop the negative thoughts, which of course are our coping mechanism. Every time you think something negative say out loud ‘stop stop stop delete’. Then say out loud what you want. I realise this sounds crazy, but it works.
We don’t know which cycle will work but it will work.

Hello @Pinklady81 sending you virtual hugs. I found out the best way is to accept that you have negative thoughts, they are just thoughts.stop putting extra pressure on yourself that you need to fight these thoughts.just observe them and label them as thoughts and not facts. 🙂

@Pinklady81 hi, I've just been reading about your journey. I hope your egg collection went ok? Thinking positive thoughts that you had some success.

@Thinkinhappythoughts thank you so much retrieved 1 egg and the good news is it fertilised so today that's a positive ! Xx

That's good news! Will you have to wait now until day 5/6 before transfer?

Why didn't they do the ICSI if that's what you requested?

I can't have a transfer I'm on a freeze all package I did have icsi but that doesn't guarantee fertilisation does it ...

Thoughts on PGT testing I was all for it and have paid as part of my package but with so few embryos and one that can't be tested already I may only have 1-2 to test

The other drawback is all my embryos are to be frozen then thaw them then test then freeze again then thaw for transfer it sounds like an awful lot to put those poor em babies through! I would appreciate any help as need to decide by tomorrow as they said they will freeze them on day 3 ready for testing eventually ! My head is in a spin thanks for reading and really hope everyone is okay

How many have made it to day 3?
Our first plan was to do 3 cycles back to back, freeze on day 3 per cycle, defrost all after cycle 3, see if any make it to day 5/6, then freeze what we have and send samples for PGT-A but I have 6 that made it to day 5/6 on the first cycle and I have to skip a month due to responding well to cycle 1 so we took a gamble and opted to send for testing whilst we wait out this month.
Our decision was based on gut feeling mainly. We can start cycle 2 next month if we need to so not really losing out apart from financially obviously but at this point in the process we are just trying to make the best informed decision possible.
You have to do what's right for you and make judgements based on how you feel about it. I didn't want to freeze these and wait to test, I wanted to know now and see if a second cycle was necessary. My consultant advised based on statistics but my response to the drugs and egg collection wasn't in keeping with the statistics!
Hope that helps?

That's great @Pinklady81 that your egg fertilised. What did you decide to do about testing? x

Day 3 is tomorrow so waiting to hear but they need to know by then so confused what to do ... x

Hey
What did you decide to do?

It's game over for me embryo arrested and not grown so I'm out now

I’m sorry :( xx

I don't think I have it in me for anymore treatment . Bought a 3 cycle freeze all package, cycle 1 3 eggs only 1 fertilised 4cc grading
Next two cycles cancelled due to cyst which then cleared then poor responder so cancelled again

Switched to naturally modified for better chances retrieved one egg fertilised this week and then day 3 no cell division said will leave until tomorrow but I know there's no point !

I'm truly just done emotionally physically mentally and financially life can be so so cruel and unfair .

I'm so sorry @Pinklady81 it's so unfair, you're right. Thinking of you xx

I’m so sorry @Pinklady81 :( does that leave you with one round? This is really unfair :( xx

You mean one round left? Yes it does but don't think at the moment I can do it after such negative news after each cycle I'm broken.

@Pinklady81 you don't need to make any decisions immediately. Take time to yourself to grieve this lost chance. We're all thinking of you x

Hello everyone

After my previous posts I have heard nothing from the clinic at all despite them saying they would be in touch ... not sure what I want to anymore and the clinic has shown me little compassion or aftercare but when they want money they are quick to contact .

Am I being unreasonable I have asked for advice and for someone to contact me it has been over a week and not a single email returned?

That’s disgraceful, I am sorry :( xx

@Pinklady81 I am so sorry 😔, is there a phone number for you to call? Or if it is not far can you pop in and ask for a follow up appointment? Also focus on you and do one thing you enjoy give yourself some love and attention you need it after all this. Take care

I work in a very busy environment but have emailed more than four times my patient coordinator and the general support line . I am absolutely disgusted with them to be honest two weeks after egg collection and not a single call to see how I am

That's terrible, @Pinklady81 . What clinic/centre is it?

Hi Pinklady81

It wasnt the Evewell was it? I went in for a transfer in February to find that out of the 3 we had frozen none had made it. Haven't heard a dot from the clinic despite spending thousands with them, further more i paid just over 2k for the transfer that didnt happen and they are onyl refunding me 130 despite only using 900 from that pot in scans and thaw etc.