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Housekeeping

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This New Year, The Fledglings are Flying a new approach

824 replies

HillsBesideTheSea · 31/12/2021 16:54

Hello and welcome to new and old.

If you are new around here. Hi, introduce yourself around the fire pit in the naughty corner where we are all sitting comfortably. The naughty corner is decked out with comfy, and snacks, and a place just to have a chat when things haven't gone to plan. We are a very long running thread but do love new blood stopping by to join us.

Welcome to those who are returning.

We had a chat on the previous thread about possibly trying a new twist on the fly lady system. We all know that the fly lady system is good for establishing routines when we follow it. But we also know that sometimes we need a quick hit of a big declutter. And that life has a habit of throwing curve balls making it very difficult to stay on track.

So this is the plan. Each evening I will post the babystep, a thought point and the flylady daily focuses. We are not giving up on the fly lady system but just bringing it into line with the individuality of our lives, and trying to resolve some of the issues that comes from being the family brain, trying to do all the things and generally having modern busy lives. The thought point is to try to get you to think differently. And may require a click on a link (video), a discussion on the thread, or just you considering things. I do not promise it will make you feel better, or magically change your house straight away. But hopefully it will help with the overall flow and approach. And may just tweak the twee out of the fly lady system to the point where it is now your system.

But before you entirely regret your choices in letting my try this craziness we are going to start with some key basics that I really do think has been incorporated well into the Flylady system.

  1. the mess, disorder and chaos did not happen over night. Give yourself the grace and time to fix it. (also known as roman weren't built in a day so don't kill yourself trying to get your house immaculate in a day)
  1. Goals vs system.
We will go into this a little more shortly but to start, the fly lady system has an end goal - a house which is tidy and clean that comes second nature. It achieves it by building habits and routines that make the steps needed to achieve that goal second nature. There is a lot of research that says goals don't work, systems do. And systems are built on the formation of habits.
  1. You are never behind.
You might not be making the progress you would like, you may have taken a break. But you are not behind. So again, give yourself a break and drop the guilt. There is probably a reason why you have taken a break - illness, other demands on time, mental health etc etc. And yes some days it is an effort to make sure that everyone is fed and ok. But that is ok, so give yourself grace that on that day that was exactly what was needed and thus you succeeded in the essential goal of the day. guilt is just going to make things harder than it needs to be. It is ok not to feel guilty if you did not do all the things.

I will be back later with links for tomo. I am posting them in the evening the night before because some of us are morning people, and some of us are night people. And this way everyone will be able to see prior to when they need to consider it.

Come park your broom in the new thread for a little while and have a natter whilst we wait to bring in the New year.

OP posts:
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IWasWillingToGoWassailing · 14/01/2022 08:24

Hills hope all is well, we will keep the thread running til you get back. I recognise a lot of what you are saying about pattern spotting - although I don't have ADHD, I live with people who do and who think I am broken because I can't hold a conversation at my desk while watching TV, writing an email, listening in to another convo on the far side of the room and hold a discussion over Slack simultaneously. DH used to medicate with coffee, although it puts DS2 instantly to sleep! It helps if I can step back from the thick of what is going on and get an overview.

Yesterday was weird, DH spent two hours on the phone to FIL explaining again that he still mustn't drive. I honestly don't know if he "resets" overnight and forgets, or is using it as an excuse. FIL's principal concern appears to be that if he can't drive he can't buy a new fluorescent tube for the kitchen light, although he has 3 already 🤷🏼‍♀️.

To do:
🐧 Tea and toast and marmite
🐧 Morning routine
🐧 Back to this family - Merryhouse you are absolutely right, they are just at the top corner of Northants where it joins Rutland and Leicestershire. It's a ruddy nightmare!
🐧 Chilli for dinner - must defrost it
🐧 Birthday coffee with friends this afternoon
🐧 Buy a large bottle of red. It has been A Week.

swallowedAfly · 14/01/2022 08:26

Thank you Hills - you're so kind.

Ta das:
-Walked dog
-Made coffee
-Did grocery order for next week
-Lft'd ds (negative)
-Held firm against ds begging, bargaining, huffing and puffing to be allowed to not go to school
-Made ds's lunch
Oh and last night managed to make some solid progress with ds's room and he's now back in there with his ps4 instead of cluttering the living room so one less excuse not to sort that room out.

To do before work:
-lol on
-fold laundry on drier
-lol hung up to dry
(I'm aware many people might just call this is one job but it's def 3 for me and I can easily do the first and forget the rest and end up rewashing)
-mark a set of year 7 essays and remember to leave the bag by the door so I don't forget to take them into school
-check I'm all planned for the day
-read work emails
-check covid register and set work for students isolating
-make a flask of coffee and fill a bottle of water to take and pack bag

Then at work I obviously have to teach (only 3 lessons) and remember to bring home a set of books to mark assessments that I need done by Monday and write next weeks marking plan and check next weeks lessons and do any photocopying I need so Monday morning isn't stressy. Planning I can do over the weekend.

After work if I have any energy left I'd like to cook a proper meal before I end up having to throw out meat and veg because I haven't used it in time.

To me that sounds like a lot but I have the weekend then to take things easier.

SingToTheSky · 14/01/2022 08:27

Morning everyone :)
Not caught up with the thread yet. So sleepy. Luckily I don’t have to go anywhere today. DD1 ended up going into school in time for lesson 3 yesterday but I think she’s off again today (I haven’t been downstairs yet) and I’m not booking parkour for DS as he was very achy last night.

Listened to more Atomic Habits this morning - all about making the good habits as easy as possible and the bad ones difficult. And about the difference between planning and action when it comes to making progress. All very interesting.

The next chapter is about procrastination… I’ll get to it later 🤣

ExtremelyDetermined · 14/01/2022 08:58

Morning all

SmileSmileSmileSmile

Here are some links for today.

Flightplan

Today is Friday which means clear out your car and purse. I made a token attempt at mu bag yesterday by chucking out receipts but as I've only had this one a couple of weeks (Jan sale) is hadn't got too bad. Car OTOH - needs a tip run and then a charity shop run then hoovering. It's going for a service on Mon and I don't want to be ashamed of it.

Today's mission is to clean the bathroom basin and bath, then to wipe down the washing machine and tumble dryer. Both the latter are on here ATM, will do them when they are finished.

In the meantime, I need to go and sort out the stuff for the tip/chazza.

ExtremelyDetermined · 14/01/2022 08:59

Sing - I downloaded Atomic Habits this week, looking forward to starting it but I need to finish off a couple of other books first.

foxessocks · 14/01/2022 09:31

Sorry fell off the thread!

Trying to keep up with some of the routines/ habits from new year, some working better than others. Exercise routines are going well. Decluttering not too bad. Doing the dishwasher before bed not good at all Grin

Like the sound of that book sing I almost got it the other day!

StillUp · 14/01/2022 10:30

I hit Atomic Habits the other day Foxes. It was down to £1.99 on kindle. I’m enjoying it.

Hope everything is ok Hills and thanks for the links ED.

Lady I’m a fellow north-easter. Love Alnwick castle and beamish.

Sing you’ve had some impressive lists the last few days, hope you aren’t still feeling too worn out.

Swallow that is definitely 3 separate jobs. Carrying the clean stuff upstairs and putting it away are jobs 4 and 5. You had a good list there.

Hope the pain turns out to be nothing and disappears Red. Glad you’ve managed to see the GP.

I’ve had my first morning of the school run with a baby. We made it on time and with no dramas or stress, and also a tada list!

⭐️ both DC and me dressed and fed ( plus a shower for me)
⭐️ beds made
⭐️ s&s 1 of 2 done
⭐️ An LOL in
⭐️ dry stuff folded
⭐️ DW emptied and restacked with breakfast things
⭐️ some dishes hand washed
⭐️ 2 of 3 kitchen benches wiped
⭐️ vitamin d for me and baby
⭐️ baby changed again, fed again and now snoozing on me while I catch up on the thread.

Feel like I’m winning at life currently although I expect things to go down hill when the afternoon cluster feed starts and I have to collect DD1.

To Do:
🖊 send an e-Mail
🖊 10 mins sorting DDs’ bedrooms
🖊 second s&s
🖊 wipe third bench
🖊 possibly a few minutes zone cleaning

Should probably put down the snoozing baby but I don’t wanna!

Stilllivinginazoo · 14/01/2022 10:49

up pace yourself
Red hope things are ok with tummy
SingGrin
Ed don't have purse or car,one less job to add to list🤣🤣🤣🤣
Fly that sounds like an awful lot to remember (and washing as more than a one step task,so deffo list appropriately as helps make it feel more like the amount of work it actually is!)

Too much going on here other than flying and my resources physical and mental are at breaking point.trying to do in roads before the weekend

Tada
Cats fed
Towel wash on
Delete emails
Wake dd for meds(keeps sleep thru alarms)
Realise D's has drunk all his milk and said nothing
Make porridge (he prefers made with water thankfully and likes cereal over toast first thing)
Wake D's,lil zoo and re wake dd who took meds went back to bed to "stretch" and was asleep again when I went up...
Everyone fed and watered
DS needed a pack up so did that
Dd2 had epic kick of lil zoo not in school
DS taxi was early (and despite freezing fog was driving like a possessed man.thankful D's texts me once at school as I was having horror during 45 min wait as it's all country lanes etc)
Pop Asda for milk.managed not fall on icy paths.treated myself scotch pancakes
Brekkie(scotch pancakes and frozen cherries😋)
Wash to dryer
More in
Check on lil zoo(in bed hot water bottle as having gut issues again)
Get cat out bathroom sinkConfused
Begin reclaiming front room(with wizard of Oz in background)
*Pull out sofa 1
*Rescue cat toys
*Sweep
*Clean windows of cat snot
*Sort my wool collection back into tubs(cat attack as lids weren't on tight.huge mess)
*Tidy away stray dvds
*Clean TV unit
*Sort drawers (with mostly dd2 calming activities in)
*Clean around fireplace/mantlepiece

It looks so mucho more achieved when I write it down as that's about 1/3 the room,which seems like not much at all to look at the steps required to achieve thst

SingToTheSky · 14/01/2022 12:12

Afternoon!

I have had a productive morning in terms of work but nothing else. Monthly catch up with the boss was great, she’s impressed with my work on my projects so that’s made me very happy 😀 brain starting to get fuzzy now so I’m stopping and need to consider what else I should do today… too much. Argh.

Stilllivinginazoo · 14/01/2022 12:34

Big chunk morning on phone
Ring council as door won't lock from inside(can latch it) no one answering yesterday...
Ring and start PIP process for D's
Ring and chase up flu jab for D's

frankiefirstyear · 14/01/2022 14:12

Car cleaned out here today...meaning living room where lots was dumped is next mission. Hello procrastination 😃.
Done purse yesterday when hoping to come across some hidden money 😅.
Fixed wonky leg at DC desk.
Cleared the table from several days' worth of discarded 'art projects'.
LOL done, now on airer.
Extra credit...£7.70 from Cash4clothes for the boot full dump I done. Very skint week this week but determined not to touch dog fund.

Stilllivinginazoo · 14/01/2022 14:27

Spent over an hour on phone to doctors.i was only caller number 6..
Anyhoo Attila the receptionist was in sparkling firm til I made it very clear no the school wouldn't be vaccinating D's for flu,esp given they didn't do his covid one,and whilst I appreciate its a pandemic situation and that vaccine is vital so are flu ones given out yearly before this all started as priority to people who are asthmatic etc and he should've been called up for it sept/Oct time..eventually she got off her high horse.hes booked in 4pm wednesday.a rare win over her is like magic gold dust for the soul🤣

Not to continue taming front room

Stilllivinginazoo · 14/01/2022 14:28

*now

swallowedAfly · 14/01/2022 18:24

Well done Zoo

Unsurprisingly I didn't get everything on my list done. I did do the washing and get it hung out before work but I have two sets of assessments to mark over the weekend not one as this morning was just nope, not happening.

I tried to course correct by staying at school to mark a set but my brain was zapped and I had other stuff to do, then a junior colleague needed an ear and some support which was more important and my favourite cleaner was clearly in need of company and chat too so that took some time. I did do some admin and photocopying is done for next week and most of my planning and managed to be out of there by 5. Just need to force myself to mark and record 60 essays over the weekend, mark another 30 on Monday after school, another 30 on Wednesday in my lunch and free and bring home another 30 to do on Thursday and I will be on track and have a week where I don't have to mark assessments after that! I work Mon, Wed and Fri technically but it always spills over. Goodness knows how full timers cope.

So main missions for the weekend are marking, laundry and making a decent dent in the living room situation.

I'm strictly off duty now though and having a gin and tonic. Ds just wants to make himself noodles tonight so I'm going to aim to cook us a decent lunch of steak and veg tomorrow and cook a spag bol to use the mince which I can then batch freeze. So tomorrow the aim is cooking and living room progress and Sunday laundry and marking. My aim with ds is to get him to at least hoover stairs and landing - it will take enormous amounts of nagging energy but he needs to contribute.

Happy Friday everyone.

Ladyrattles · 14/01/2022 21:26

Today: hoovered whole downstairs, reorganised a kitchen cupboard, planned meals, wrote food shopping list and had an engineer in. Then I spent the afternoon in bed feeling ill as I'd overdone it.

Last night I got Argos to deliver a new vacuum and I'm embarrassingly excited about it. We've already got a shark with a hepa filter (due to my dust allergy) but it's always blocked as DH hoovers large stuff up & with our pets it needs emptying constantly, which I have to nag DH about. So I got myself a Henry Allergy so I can change the bags myself and not have to tip out a dusty cylinder. It was wonderful this morning, I'd forgotten what a vacuum with suction is like.

ExtremelyDetermined · 14/01/2022 22:53

Evening all,

Some productive days being posted today, well done all.

Day off work for me today, so got quite a bit done.

3xLOL washed and dried
Put a few Christmas decs in the loft (got left by mistake when the rest went up).
Brought a box of rubber stamps down to declutter - local churches are organising a craft stuff swap. Bloody freezing up there.
Tip run - several broken plastic crates, old dartboard, various kitchen bits and electronic items
Charity shop - 3 bin bags full of stuff that have been cluttering up my car
Car - moved re-usable shopping bags from back seat to newly vacated boot, picked up random socks, gloves etc from footwells
Cats - declumped and depooped litter trays, cleaned feeding mat and bowls
Photo sorting - spent probably 2-3 hours over several sessions backing up and sorting photos, I think I'm up to date but I am terrible for letting them pile up for months and I take several hundred most months so there are a lot to delete and sort. Need to make some photobooks next.
School meeting
Pick up DS
Out for a bit to eat - DCs were in top form chatting away
Back home, played with cats and came up to bed.

Redsquirrel5 · 15/01/2022 00:29

Hi Zoo unfortunately not. I was reduced to tears this evening. Test done and delivered though. Seems to have eased for the time being, just had poached eggs on toast.
That is awful that DS was missed for flu jab my DS1 gets his before me because he is a chronic asthmatic. He had his about September.

Fly That is a lot of marking to get done. Are you better chunking it or doing all thirty? Once it is all completed a treat for yourself some time spent doing something you like. Remember to focus what you have got done. It is the chipping away that helps towards that goal.

Ladyrattles it is strange how excited we get over a new piece of equipment. We know what you mean.

Frankie great list. Skint can make you quite inventive with food.
Decluttering and earning money was a brilliant idea.

Sing fantastic to get that feed back so many bosses don’t bother to praise people yet we could all do with some. It comes across how much you are enjoying it.

Up enjoy the baby snuggles.

🍒👋🍒👋🍒👋🍒 to everyone.

I fell asleep writing this and listening the 80’s top 100. Now the 70’s is on. Such good music from those eras. Some big stars too.

Redsquirrel5 · 15/01/2022 00:40

My list is short.

Made bed
S&S
DH received phone call from friend who was dropping in. Came about 11 and DH suggested we went to pub for lunch. Had lovely roasted pepper soup but oh how I regretted it later. Did some knitting.
Took test into GP surgery.
Dropped off cake to DS3 and then DS2.
DH made me a cup of tea and some of our cake. Had rest and knitted. Stomach really sore and I was cold always a bad sign for me. Almost dozed off but didn’t quite manage it whereas DH had no bother.
Went to Mass
Came home and made poached eggs.
Bed at 10 but awake again now. Might read some of my book.

HazelNuttyElf · 15/01/2022 03:26

Oh Red sorry to hear you're not doing well, I really hope you get answers with the tests. Do you know how long you have to wait for the results?
I'm hoping you were able to go back to sleep by now too.

This week has been busy, just a normal week at work really. I did get quite a bit done on Tuesday (my day off), including washing the sheets, 3 other LOLs, deep cleaning the bathrooms & some running around with FIL.

Not much else done the rest of the week, just the basics really.

So DD graduated on Wednesday! She got done with high school before everyone else in her grade. I'm super proud of her, she also was able to graduate with some dual credit classes under her belt, so she has some college credits.

DS wasn't feeling good today when he got home from school, had a high fever when I got home from work. He's had medicine now and is starting to feel better/ fever going down now too.

I now have 5 days off my main job, will work a few hours on Sunday at my 2nd job, but I'm looking forward to that, haven't worked there since before Christmas. Hopefully I'll be on here more often with more updates etc.

HazelNuttyElf · 15/01/2022 04:17

hills the 2 list thing sounded just like what I need to do in my house. We have lots of little jobs that need doing, areas that need sorting and it would help figure out chores for the DC as well.

ED that's quite a list you have there, being able to get rid of things as well is a bonus. I have decluttering I need to do too. I also need to do my jeep too, it needs to go through the car wash and get a good vacuum as well, hopefully I can do that this weekend.
lady overdoing it is never good, especially if it puts you in bed the rest of the day. Is there a time your can use to stop yourself and make you take a break?
fly getting DS to help is a good thing, it's life lessons he'll need to learn eventually 🤷‍♀️
foxes I'm in the same boat, some things I'm making progress in as far as making new habits/ routines, then others I've already failed at. It will all take time. I'm trying to do one or 2 things to change at a time, but I'm so convincing that even that is hard to do.
zoo I don't know how you cope with some people, the receptionist sounds like she needs to be knocked off her high horse. If you need an appointment, she should make you one (or DS), is she the doctor? No! She shouldn't be deciding who needs an appointment and who doesn't!! Ugh, that makes me so mad 🤬 I get that things are way different over there vs here, but that to me is just ridiculous 😒

I know that was more I was going to respond to, but I've had some Bailey's to drink tonight and I'm falling asleep now! I'm sorry! 🍒👋 to everyone else

Stilllivinginazoo · 15/01/2022 05:12

Redhope your tummy is feeling better today and you got more sleep
Hazel congratulations to your daughter🌟

swallowedAfly · 15/01/2022 07:00

ED that was a very productive day!

Red I hope you managed to get back to sleep. Yes I tend to chunk marking. Get out a pile of 30 books and have to mark a minimum of 6 essays before I can go get a drink or play a Facebook game or watch ten minutes of a show etc. then back on again. Pleased with myself if I manage ten straight. I might aim for one set today and the other tomorrow.

Hazel well done to your dd! Hope ds feels better over weekend.

I’m awake and building up to first po3
-take dog out
-make coffee
-fold dry clothes and shuffle damp ones around o the drier.

swallowedAfly · 15/01/2022 07:03

One thing that is going well is weight loss. Have managed to stick with that for ages and have lost a lot. About 21lbs left to go before I go away in April. So weight and work ok, home to be worked on.

Stilllivinginazoo · 15/01/2022 07:36

flywell done on the marking,and weight loss

I'm up and on two hours sleep am reluctant to head into town now(45 minute walk) as very cold and suns not up yet,but heyho needs must and I can't get the things needed elsewhere or cheap enough.i need grab some food at some point today also as out bread,milk.proper food shop probs be tom

SingToTheSky · 15/01/2022 10:06

Morning.

YesTaDa
🧩shower
🧩1to1 with the boss
🧩bit of emailing/planning

That was about it tbh.

Finally watching Sort Your Life Out while I have the telly to myself (with a McDonald’s breakfast :o) - episode one with the single mum of 3 girls - can’t help thinking their house really isn’t that bad 🤣 other than the attic (we don’t use ours)