Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Housekeeping

Find cleaning advice from other Mumsnetters on our Housekeeping forum.

Original poster

Need help with cleaning and decluttering...

320 replies

withaspongeandarustyspanner · 17/02/2016 09:53

DH is unhappy in our relationship and wants to leaveand has cited my housekeeping/lack of ability to get rid of stuff as a factor. I'm overwhelmed. Don't know where to start.

Any tips?

OP posts:
Original poster
withaspongeandarustyspanner · 03/03/2016 09:14

She seems pretty good and I quite like the fact that she knows him. I find a kind of comfort in that.

OP posts:
Sitoff · 03/03/2016 10:28

Sponge I am pleased that you are still managing to work towards having the home you want. The washing continues to be a battle here - I suppose I have to accept all I can hope to do is tame the pile! Like all of you are am starting to feel that home is somewhere I can relax.

CiderwithBuda · 03/03/2016 13:00

Sorry it's still hard but well done for keeping on Sponge. I'm sure it DOES help you feel in control. Feeling in control in one area of your life is very important when other things are so out of your control.

I've not done as much as I should have this week. No charity shop or tip run. I'm concentrating on getting up to date with the washing today. I did the ironing yesterday and need to change bed today. I have decluttered a large packet of chocolate digestives and some jam donuts though. Blush

Thanks for your wishes. Just want it over with now.

Grumpyoldblonde · 04/03/2016 07:57

All the best for today cider

Anyone have plans today? I am running out of things to clear out. I am half desperate to make a start on the garden but it is far to cold. I have a bit of work to do today but not much, that could change with a singe email though.
How are you today sponge ?

Sitoff · 04/03/2016 08:52

Cider glad you will not have to come home after the appointment to any unwanted biscuits or donuts Smile

Sounds like everyone is still making progress and managing to keep on top of their gains. I really am finding that it is starting to feel like I could keep the house in reasonable shape if I manage the whole process. Grumpy what about photos - that for me is the ultimate challenge!

Original poster
withaspongeandarustyspanner · 04/03/2016 11:47

Thinking of you cider

Well, my boss has been brilliant and she's letting me have Fridays off for the foreseeable. This will be my day to get things sorted so that life at the weekend is less fraught just 'treading water'. I'm attacking our bedroom today.

OP posts:
Original poster
withaspongeandarustyspanner · 04/03/2016 11:49

You know, ladies, for the first time in years, the two laundry baskets in our bedroom are not overflowing. They are still full, and there are still two of them, but... (baby steps)

OP posts:
Grumpyoldblonde · 04/03/2016 13:16

That's really great sponge the extra time and the laundry basket, there are a lot of you, there is bound to be a lot of laundry but you sound so much more positive about your home, especially with all your other worries. You have come a long way since you started this thread. I think/hope I have finished my work for the day, so I am going to run the hoover round, stick the dishwasher on and have a cup of tea. The house is so much easier to take care of now I have slung out all the crap, it really has bought me so much extra time (and money as a I don't want to spend money on more rubbish and b More time to work without being distracted by any mess)

CountessOfStrathearn · 04/03/2016 13:38

Baby steps really is the way. As Flylady says, it took more than a day for the house to get like that. It is going to take more than a day to fix it!

You are doing very, very well!

Grumpyoldblonde · 05/03/2016 10:01

Good morning, hope everyone is well today?
I have a work free weekend for once - yay! Oh is working but said when he comes home he will 'edit' his clothes - the declutter bug is contagious.
I have to do a food shop, funny thing is since I have cleared all our junk I am much more mindful of what food I buy.
All uniforms are washed and put away, just need to hoover and steam mop the kitchen floor then relax.
Anyone have plans for today?

Sitoff · 05/03/2016 14:34

It is freezing here so decided to make a start on paperwork but family getting in the way. Could take a while! Sponge what a great workplace to give you some time - sounds like that will be a help. Well done everyone for making it through another week. Hope Cider all went well yesterday.

yetanotherdeskmove · 05/03/2016 14:43

I've had a busy week and my house is back to the state it was before I started :(

PigeonPie · 05/03/2016 15:09

Well, today is St Pirran's day so DH (who's Cornish) and the DSs decided we needed pasties for lunch so I spent the morning making a mess in the kitchen producing them and saffron buns for tea! (Mess all cleared up now!)

Have now taken and dropped off DS1 to a Cubs event for the afternoon and there's no point going home before collecting him so I'm shopping in town (only for things I need!) and having a coffee and biscuits on my own!

PigeonPie · 05/03/2016 15:12

yetanother I'm sure it won't be as bad as before - I bet you'll be able to have a quick whip round (or better still get the family to!) and it won't take long to put things in their rightful places.

Sitoff · 05/03/2016 15:41

Happy St Pirran's Pigeon! Coffee by myself here too - everyone else busy so decided to come out and catch the tiny bit of sun. Yetanother sorry you are feeling fed up - hope you are proved wrong and it is quicker than before to catch up.

CiderwithBuda · 05/03/2016 15:45

All went well yesterday thanks everyone. Not too sore. And am wearing a most attractive pair of dark green compression stockings. The colour of my old school uniform. Thank god it's winter!

Not achieving much though obviously. Lots of lying on sofa reading and MNing. Showed DS how to wash his sports kit. He is 14 - able up time he learned! Need to get him to hang it up now!

yetanotherdeskmove · 05/03/2016 16:52

I've made dh and ds1 clear the dining table so that's better and I've hoovered so the floor looks better at least and you are right it's not as bad as it was.

I've also looked up how to kondo fold clothes so I'm going to have a go at that to see if it will sort my drawers out.

Oh and I've finally been to the charity shop to drop off the 4 bags I cleared last weekend, I've been driving round with them in my boot all week Blush

I often feel in fighting a loosing battle though as a 5yo and 2yo just seem to make mess like it's going out of fashion - the 2yo has emptied a Lego container all over the 5yo 's floor this afternoon AngryAngry

Grumpyoldblonde · 05/03/2016 18:23

Hey yetanotherdeskmove dropping those bags off is a great move, hard with young children and all their lego, but well worth getting rid of as much as possible.

Less weekend cleaning and tidying means I managed to fit in a haircut today, I feel so much better, work and looking after the house meant I never got much relax time (having a glass of wine now, getting my life back!)
Cider you rest up and relax, glad it went ok and you are not too sore, plenty of rest for you Flowers

Pasties, yum, sounds good pigeon I could declutter one right now!

I bought a couple of plastic storage baskets today for 99p for 2, very pleased as one now holds my flour and the other contains my bags of pasta, no more rooting around the back of the cupboard. I think I am a bit obsessed with organising my life and home at the moment Smile

Sitoff · 06/03/2016 12:21

Happy Mothers Day to any mothers on the thread. Day relaxing here after a long session sorting paperwork again yesterday evening. It was ok sitting in front of the tv and it made me realise I could get there eventually. All I have to do today is cook a roast - strangely one of the few household tasks I enjoy!

yetanotherdeskmove · 06/03/2016 16:48

Well done on all the paperwork, I've not tackled that yet.

Another charity shop bag done though and a load more stuff in the bin too.

Slowly making progress.

Mother's Day a bit mixed for me as I lost my mum as a child but I got lovely hand made cards from my boys today and lots of cuddles.

Hope everyone else is having a good day.

Sitoff · 07/03/2016 08:45

yetanother sorry to hear that. The paperwork is far from done but I feel good to have started and I will have time again today to do some more.

Original poster
withaspongeandarustyspanner · 07/03/2016 13:59

Things are pretty dark and dismal here. But I am going to get the house sorted if it kills me. My Mum and Aunt are talking about coming over to help sort and throw.

OP posts:
yetanotherdeskmove · 07/03/2016 15:08

I'm really sorry to hear things are so bad. Would talking about it help? Good on you for keeping going with the sorting and clearing though you are doing great :)

Grumpyoldblonde · 07/03/2016 15:54

You are doing great sponge it can't be easy for you with everything so bad at home, I admire your determination.
Had a terrible nights sleep, nothing done today, I just want my bed...

Original poster
withaspongeandarustyspanner · 07/03/2016 18:43

It's pretty horrendous. He told me at the weekend that he didn't want to try to make our marriage work; that for him our marriage is over.

I was just speaking to SIL. He has confided in her. He had said he had felt disconnected from me, our house and our children. Turns out it's just me he has a problem with - the children he loves (I am glad to hear this because for a while there, I thought there was something wrong with him) and I guess the house can be sorted.

OP posts: