How much are people giving their children for graduation?

[BerryTwister]

DS1 is graduating this week. I’m very proud of him, he’s worked hard and done well. It seems to be the done thing to give graduating kids some money, which I’m happy to do. But I’m wondering what the going rate is. Most of my friends in the same position are much richer than me, so I don’t want to ask them, because the money they can afford is crazy! Can people on here tell me how much, if anything, they’re giving their graduating kids?

I would have thought all the money you spent supporting him through uni was enough, no?

We gave our son a slap up meal and many many hugs along with telling him how proud I am of him.

He was not expecting a cash bonus ffs, we supported him through uni and he is grateful and respectful of that.

As with many young adults trying to get into work and real life, we have also supported him to help with rent and bills whilst job hunting, though happy to report he starts a job in his chosen career in a few weeks time and "don't worry mum I'm fine, I can pay for myself" were words I was proud to hear.

Nothing. Their reward is their degree. That doesn’t mean I haven’t helped my children, I financially supported them throughout their degree, but money for grades? No way.

My sister and I were taken out for a nice meal when we graduated a few years ago, but certainly weren't given money. As graduates, we were finally at a point where we could be out making our own money!

If your DS really needs something (help with a deposit on a flat for example, or help buying a new car) then that's a bit different, but a degree is surely a reward in itself.

I think the idea of giving grown adults a cash reward for doing well at something that was entirely in their own interest is very odd tbh.

Talking them out for a wonderful meal or buying them a special gift is a much more appropriate way to demonstrate that you are proud of them.

Helping them financially e.g. rent/house deposit, paying off some student debt, supplementing income should be treated completely separately imo.

2 of my friends have given their kids £500 and £1000 respectively!

it wouldn’t have crossed my mind not to buy a gift.

i spent just under £500 on a gift for my dd, jeweller and a designer bag, we all went out for dinner, I paid for her outfit and gown and photos.

it was a special day, she’s worked her arse off for 5 years to gain her masters.

Never occurred to me to do this. My mum didn't give me anything either. I didn't know anyone who got money?

No cash bonus from us. It isn't the done thing at all.

I told my daughter if she got a first I would buy her a watch. Then she went and got a first.
So she chose a watch and wears it every day for work. When she passed her chartered accountancy exams I gave her the ring I got on the day she was born, which was very special.
She now earns a heck of a lot more than me, but these things are sentimental to her.

We just had a celebratory lunch. It wouldn't have occured to me to make this a transactional thing. How about if they have a sibling that drops out or doesn't get expected grades?

I think giving a gift she can treasure is really different to handing over cash though!

The cash thing just reminds me of pay-per-grade at GCSEs. Which is perhaps understandable when trying to motivate idiotically lazy 15 year olds with no sense of long term consequences. But definitely not by the time they have done their bloody degree!

We're going for a meal and I got a cake from her favourite cake shop. I also got her a bracelet but didn't spend anything like 'mumsnet' money if you see what I mean.

Rich parents giving their already well provided for kids £. It’s the way of the world I guess.
It is not the done thing.
I took my son out to lunch after the ceremony.

Nothing

Il not be giving my daughter money. I've spent tens of thousands on her being at uni. Il get her flowers, the outfit she wants to wear to graduation - just a black dress and heels for under the gown, a bracelet and wer going for a meal with all the family wel obviously pay for.

A nice brooch and a round of beers.

I didn’t know this was a thing. DD is about to start a degree. We’ll take her out for a nice dinner when she graduates- I think that’s what my parents did for me.

What a mean, grudging, small-minded attitude. I’m glad I’m not like you.

OP, I guess it’s down to what you want to do and what you can afford. I bought my son a new suit, his dad bought him a good watch, we took him out to lunch. Since graduations, he’s been living at home and working hard on job applications and doing lots of gig work to supplément the allowance I pay him. He’s recently secured a good graduate job and starts in September. He’d been saving to afford a week on a beach somewhere with his girlfriend, and I topped him up so they could book and go before they both start their new jobs.

I count myself enormously lucky to have à son making his way in life whom we can help and whose successes we can celebrate. Life is more expensive for young people today, and opportunities harder to secure. You indulge your son as best you can, OP! Congratulations to him!

We all went for lunch. Ds and his gf were then going on holiday so we gave him €100 to pay for a nice meal when they were away.

I bought dd a pair of shoes for her grad that she had been eyeing up for ages. They were about £200 (last year) and she was so surprised she got a bit emotional!
she wore them on the day and was so happy with them.
We took her and a couple of her friends out for a very swish dinner and stayed over in a nice hotel for the night.
No monetary reward. We had paid through the nose like most parents do to support her at uni - accommodation costs are no joke. She fully appreciated this.
She hasn’t mentioned that any of her friends who graduated were financially rewarded for doing so either!
So doesn’t seem to be the norm here but if you want to then just give what you want and can afford.

I’ve never heard of anyone being given money for passing their degree, it’s more usual to have a celebratory family meal.

We are not giving any cash - are people really doing that?

We are incredibly proud of our child and are taking her for a meal and will give her a small gift (necklace £30).

We didn't give either of ours any money.

Nothing for any of ours. A dinner somewhere nice was all we did. Why does academic achievement need to be monetised?