The Cybergarden - Late Summer Edition

[madmouse]

Sorry been unfaithful, lots going on. But making myself useful - here's your new thread x

Upward just to say i hope your assessment goes ok!
Ive got to dash for a train and wont be around for a couple of days.

Take Care everyone

Safe travels, kizzie, if I'm not too late.
Another idea if not too late: would anyone like a of something hot?
Raining hard here, and hope upward's managing to stay dry.

Oh shodatin, is so utterly what I need right now.

Hope the various difficult meetings have gone well.

Thank you shodatin for delicious hot , & so glad your home is snug . < shivers at memory of no ch & dble glazing > - actually our upstairs has no ch atm , but at least preevious tenant warned us it was icy before we let the house ...owner had an eco survey or whatever done , but hasn't replaced boiler or lagged loft - so wasteful .

< comforting herbal for upward after hideous assessment . We've all been thinking of you all day ... hope you get some nice distraction or treat this weekend , to keep raise your spirits through tough times . Wish we could help more .

Thank you so much upward ,shodatin &Tianc. I repeated your words to myself in the waiting room and it really helped , as did Her Felinity's hypnosis & cuddly kindness < Puss curls up with upward for the night >

Well , appt was even more arduous than I'd expected , but in a very different way - my MH history snce childhood apparently having a crucial bearing on how my condition & impairments are interpreted by specialist(s).... HCP keen to stress lack of prejudice , so we'll see - may see if a MH organisation can offer some support in coming months .
On the bright side , doc was as colourful as my MH history incredibly thorough in warning about difficult consultations & choices - most impressed . < me me me > .

How fabulous of you to think of getting db a subscription to ancestry , shodatin- dh subscribes when has enough free time to justify the cost , & would be very happy to try to answer any questions about using it , as Tianc is so bustly - as Tianc says , it can be very sobering to see what a trail we all leave , but incredibly exciting to find whole worlds "opened up" .

Hope we're all enjoying our well - earned rest this evening

Thanks for the news hob - been wondering how the day went, and it sounds absolutely exhausting although worthwhile for the future.
Thankyou also for the offer of your dh's help if/when I get db a subscription//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////sorry about odd printing here, too tired to try putting it right - good night all.

So glad you survived your appt, hob. Sounds, dare I say it, actually constructive. Hope Upward's also went OK.

madmouse! 13 whole years! Wow! Many congratulations!

shodatin, I have a current Ancestry subscription and will happily help if I can - but I don't use it for tree building, which is the technical bit hob's DH may know more about. Btw, if your DB fancies starting for free, I'd suggest looking on www.freebmd.org.uk/ . It doesn't hold your hand like Ancestry, and is only for Births Marriages Deaths 1837 to however-far-they've-got-in-the-C20th. But it's a glimpse into what's possible.

Ancestry does do a free 14-day trial. But it's one of those where you give your credit card number and then have to cancel within the 14 days or you're lumbered. Not handy for the disorganised among us.

Sorry to burble about this rather than real, interesting stuff you've all been up to. Unsurprisingly, I've crashed, and spent today weeping over a mere blue badge renewal [wuss]. And more to the point snapped at people horribly, and I'm revolted and ashamed but I'll doubtless do it again.

Could I selfishly grab another of those s? I need that or a swift kick into touch.

Anyway, tomorrow is another day. Sleep well all, let's hope the sun shines on us all tomorrow.

Oh Tianc, you have been doing too much and got over-tired, bet. Thank you so much for details to get DB going on ancestors, I hadn't a clue on all this and will definitely get back to you, having made notes for time being.
Just to say, I get upset over the blue badge nonsense too - all the hassle of providing a photograph which is not on display and I've never been asked for, plus the high cost of sending them a £2 cheque for paperwork! You really do need someone fit and determined to help cope with being a disabled person, and I'm not surprised it was the last straw. Please join me in a short, strong - mine's an expresso but will make you whatever you like, and please forgive yourself for snapping at people while unwell.
Hope you feel calm and rested today, and apologies to all for abrupt departure last night, just exhaustion taking over as I'm not Superwoman either.

I hope the general exhaustion/feeling rough or overdone resolves soon for those affected; I don't think the current weather helps.

I'm trying to find a better way to deal with reading psych letters to my GP...just get a major ostrich feeling on reading the psych's discussion of my present symptoms, her diagnosis and her future plans. Equally I do need to read/take the info in, as I never remember much of consultations. The letter also explains why the day service people were saying that the review next week isn't for discharge, because the psych has put x more weeks.

Oh shodatin, thank you for that.

You've just said pretty much what I've thought for ages - that one needs to be fit and well to cope with being disabled. My working friends curl up in horror when faced with even unintrusive forms, and I think, "How on earth would you cope with the sort of stuff I have to fill in? And you're not even impaired while you do it."

What finished me off, on top of the grrrr photo hassle, was discovering that apparently only people who pay utility bills are now permitted to have blue badges round here. Which obviously won't disenfranchise disabled people with no personal income (thank you IB/ESA changes) who don't pay their own bills, will it? I'm still jointly named, but I am INCANDESCENT on behalf of the many people who aren't.

Sorry you're so exhausted yourself. Rest day for both of us...

Hope Upward's OK after her yesterday's meeting. A lot harder than blue badges...

x-post. Upward so good to see you.

Sorry, it must be very difficult reading those letters. Sympathy sympathy.

Time for a nice hot all round, I think. British Rail tea, espresso and warming soup all available...

It is difficult reading technical letters, upward, but better than the alternative of being shut out from decision-making, and hopefully you'll be free of all the HCPs one of these days, apart from the ones you choose of course.
Hope you're still feeling that the day service is worthwhile, as you seem to be getting a few weeks extra. You don't mention any contact with other patients these days, so I hope you've found people you like while attending.

< slurps delicious soup gratefully > at over - caffeinated Tianc

So true shodatin & Tianc that feeling unwell & impaired makes the forms / interviews / attempting any interaction with officialdom hellish & often totally impossible ..ahem

Many sympathies from me too upward . Massive , massive admiration for facing this stuff ... agree with shodatin that there have been staggering advances in involvement of service users in recent years . Please plan something nice for yourself this weekend , if you feel up to it .

Total sympathy for yesterday's upset , Tianc . I struggle madly to control my emotions when dealing with such issues . Didn't realise the utility bills were required but have come up against this issue recently as am not named on them , though must see if companies will change it for us .Thank you & shodatin for alerting me to extra requirements .

I suggested shodatin ask dh any q s on the use of ancestry.com as Tianc is so busy & adapting to many new things - hope you realised that , Tianc , and excellent suggestion of trying freeBMD first first . As Tianc says , the ancestry site does a free 14 days' trial and a one month subscription which costs more per month than the cost per month of the annual sub - they don't do a 6 month sub , & the annual one isn't cheap , though worth it if you can get stuck in < thinks of kizzie here>
.
Perhaps shodatin could test the water with her db a little with a sample potential ancestor.

Hope you're not more tired than usual today shodatin , that Tianc is relieved to have achieved so much this week, & that kizzie's couple of days away (at work I think ? ) go well
Time for afternoon

Thanks for the !

Tianc , society's demands on disabled people are definitely too high...I'm sorry you're having blue badge issues :s

I definitely wouldn't want to be out of the loop, shodatin There are just parts that are hard reading.

hob , I'm planning on the farmers' market tomorrow (unless the weather worsens).

kizzie hope your journey goes well.

A belated thanks for the hob, have already had more than usual today (and only drink the black stuff in the mornings).
Not sure what I should do about a sample potential ancestor though, because beyond the grandparents I don't know of any ancestors, and db probably knows less and definitely cares less at present). Thanks for the information; am beginning to think this would be a rather generous present to him, which is not really what I had in mind. (Still trying to save up for my garden shed/astronomers' den)

Hope the weather is good enough to enjoy the farmers' market upward.
There is one in the village here, every third Thursday I believe, but can never remember in time.
Before I forget, the Pak Choi seeds have now germinated and packet promises salad-size in 30 days - can't wait, and thanks to hob for suggestion.

Happy hunting at the farmer's market, Upward.

And happy growing for the table-top farmer, too. Hope anti-slug measures continue to defeat the Slugs of Doom, shodatin.

Oh hob, I didn't think you were saying anything weird. Thank you for being so very considerate about how much I'm doing. Mind you, sometimes the genealogy helps keep me sat down, not leaping up to stuff all the time.

Talking of which, work on house paid off today: DP walked in and said, "Wow." And then another, "Wow." And then, "Mine!" about the finished study (the room I've been glacially doing all this time). So worth every ounce of effort (tho not the snappiness).

Hope your day has been good too, kizzie.

And here's wishing us all a good night's sleep, safe from the gales that are scheduled to howl, apparently. Take care all.

Congratulations to Tianc on improved home with compliments from DP - it is worthwhile spending time on one's living space, but so easy to do too much. Glad your efforts are appreciated, and that you were able to DIYourself.

Have a lovely time spending money on lovely stuff at Farmers' Market, onward, and I do hope weather is kind.

Sorry I forgot about signing off yesterday - memory not improving with age.

Aha upward , farmer's market would be just the thing so I hope the rain & howling gales holds off . Don't be shy to share your culinary adventures with us < tummy growls > Ooof at forgetting the one in your village , shodatin , what a pain .

What fabulously amazing news that you were able to surprise DP with study , Tianc !!!! Awwww at your DP''s incredulous "Mine!" . This magnificent achievement calls for a jig < puts on music for exuberant whirling >

Also very pleased that you're still planning to aquire a shed-cum-observatory , shodatin , and I wish it wasn't such a costly business .
Sorry if db is feeling paricularly low at the moment & hope his stress eases up soon , and with it your worries for him .

It's very common to not have details of ancestors before grandparents , but that's still a very fruitful start , so I hope you can revisit the idea of family history research at some point, and Tianc & dh & I would love to help you join the ranks of genealogy addicts

Thank you Tianc - I was embarrassed as didn't want to butt in on your help with family history , but know you're very busy
So pleased you've sown pak choi , 8shodatin* Have forgotten here so will give it a try , thank you

Speaking of busy ,hope madmouse & family are well & thatkizzie enjoying some relaxation after busy traveland toil .
Have a wildly zestful , sociable day planned < falls asleep & misses all of it >

Wake up hob, Wake up there! Won't let you sleep today and miss all the busy socialising you planned - it's too easy (and I always regret it later).
Join me in the last espresso of the day and stay awake today!
Am very grateful to you and tianc for your kind offers of help to get started with genealogy for db,, but can't do it at present. Kizzie kindly offered help to start Twittering, and I did want to do it, but there's a shortage of time here just now.

The first of the weekend's Skype messages just arrived; DB telling me he has no interest in ancestors, will probably visit next week and has lost connection for one TV in changeover - so thanks once again for your kind offers - too early (or late?) to get him involved in the subject.

Hope hob managed to stay awake and enjoyed the socialising today. and that upward got to Farmers' Market and bought some lovely food for a cooking session.

Hope you got your zestful day, hob (what a brilliant word, don't hear "zest" enough ).

shodatin glad you're expecting a visit from your brother - but sorry he's having TV problems. It's so lovely of you to keep thinking of stuff to tempt him - I guess he only picks up on a few.

If you're a bit disappointed because you wanted to know family history yourself, I could try to do a quick tree for you with a couple of generations back, if you'd like? If you PM me the names, approx birth dates and places of the grandparents you'd like to pursue, I'll very happily do what I can. After all, I now have a study to work in.

But NB that will almost certainly tell me who you are (tho I won't pry), so only do so this if you're happy with it.

Upward how did your day go? Have you baskets of market goodies to cook up tomorrow? You always seem to have such good food ideas.

Hope kizzie also had a good day, and the mouse family got a bit of rest before their busiest day tomorrow.

Sleep well, all.

I'm so grateful to you tianc, for offering help to find out about grandparents for me, but don't think I can take up the offer. As you say, you'd know who I am, or rather, who we all are, including the men in my family, who would be most upset, so it's something I'll save for the future. My brother still needs help, despite drugs and CBT, because the depression has such a negative
influence and he is still suffering daily without much hope for future improvement. I thought I knew about depression until now.

End of unhappy post, and I wish everryone a good night.

Another beautiful, sunny day here, and don't know why people are complaining about the weather!
Hope everyone had a good sleep and is able to enjoy the day.
Been thinking about upward who planned a shop at Farmers' Market, and sure I'm not the only one awaiting news of subsequent cookery session. I do hope you got there this time upward, and have time to tell us about your food plans (licking lips emoticon)

How distressing for you shodatin to see your db feeling so low , and I'm sure the situation would be far worse without your attentiveness . Your friends here We're worrying now that it will take a huge toll on you , but I know you try to conserve your precious energy , and not expend it on too much worry ... pretty impossible , I'm sure . I so hope your understandable fears there will be little improvement will be disproved .

Amazing sunshine here too , after incredible rain late last night . So sorry for absence yesterday but your waking me up worked and had an unforgettable day ! Thank you so much ! Was v foolishly out till late , doing political stuff , eating cream teas then celebrating our dear friend's 5oth birthday < collapses even thinking aboutit >.
Had a feverish virus before going so am needing to doze all week , I think < tried not to breathe over anyone but really wanted to share occasion >

Hope you're able to have a weekend with a pleasant things / distractions , upward- I think it would really help you to be able to have a couple of hours out , without necessarily needing to socialise ... can you think about a trip to the cinema or theatre soon ? If there's something on at an affordable venue I find these really help my state of mind . Agree with shodatin that sharing culinary tips is great fun < in need of such >

Tianc is a lovely person to offer research help ( from her new study ) and I'm sure looks forward to doing so when it's better time , as would dh & I- thought you'd feel safer with safety - conscious Tianc .

Oops , have to try to buy some food so must finish over - long chattering later ... peaceful afternoon to all

Dozing sounds good. I have been reading to see how everyone's doing, just going through a few 'bad' days this weekend it seems.

I hopeo everyone's well.