Are you (a) tired of ttc (b) have sore ladybits from SWIing ! If this sounds like you then hop aboard.

[Icedlemonmuffin]

Hi have made a new batch of cock tail muffins for those of us who have been trying for along time and

(a) are struggling to get excited by the sight of a cockadoodle running towards every other day of our fertile days !!

(b)have sore ladybits from all the SWIing we have been doing the past few months

and

(c) who just want to moan,groan and bitch how boring it can all get!

All funny sperm killing stories welcome I need a laugh and to know I'm not the only one going insane ttc

So hop aboard and you to can be a bus whore like me !!!!!!!!

I have a swollen tongue and my kidney yang is deficient - my pulse was practically non-existent for the first couple of appts, but is getting stronger now hoorah! The kidney yang is related to the blood and your LP/progesterone etc, but that is about as much as I remember.

I think the needles work by tapping into your various energy streams, lymph system etc, and because they are metal they give a slight electrical charge. It helps move the energy round and clear blockages. Sounds v hippy trippy but its been used for thousands of years to treat so many different things. Keep the faith Lou! Whether it works by changing your energy, or works because you think it will work, I don't really care, but faith is all. Its definitely helped bring down my hormone levels and that is all that is important to me. Plus I feel better mentally and more positive since I started it so that is a big bonus. Anyway, I will get off me soapbox!

Polly I was on clomid for 6 months. It gave me regular AF but also regular PMT, some panic attacks, headaches & other symptoms. I've been off it a month now & at the time i hated taking but did it cos I thought it'd give us a baby but now it doesn't seem as bad as it felt at the time. It made me ovulate which was a bonus but don't know why we missed it or didn't stick!

No we don't have any children so am waiting on IVF but giving it a go to see if natural effects work!

I also did accupuncture before starting clomid. i enjoyed it but it got a bit expensive!

You could always join my other thread Clomid part IV as we've all been on clomid recently or still on it. Tons of advice there!
For some strange reasons my stomach muscles ache today!!!

xxx

Thanks Fairy! Did you get the symptoms when you took the drug, or was it all the time? I did look at some of the Clomid threads but felt a bit of a fraud as we can't start it for a month or two yet (waiting for hormone levels to drop sufficiently). Perhaps I will lurk in stealth mode until we have the drugs in my grubby little mitts.

Know what you mean - I can't keep doing the acupuncture indefinitely, it would bloody bankrupt us!

I am going to give the acupuncture for this cycle. We will see. PMA PMA!!

Hi all, still here! Still only at one shag for this month, but dh has gone to bed early and we are going out 2moro night for dinner (so won't be too late to bed!!) so hopefully an early night 2moro which I get to join in!! Hooray. Too late for swi this month but sff would be a nice change!

Good luck with getting your dh to do his sample lou , it took me months to get mine to do his, and he has not yet gone for the results and it will be 3 weeks on monday since he took the sample in. (not that I am counting) Will have to nag again next week.

Good morning bus whores!

Hope everyone is ok?

Lou you could do an exchange with dh, he does the sample you will then pay some attention to his bingo dabber !!!

We swi last night and pre seed is very good for avoiding getting sore bits.

I have already offered sexual favours.

Bloody men !!!
The only other thing I can think of is wait until he is asleep!

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!

Am really annoyed with my stupid fucking body now.

Yesterday cervix clamped shut in morning, then later in the evening had ewcm did a quick check and it was frickin open again. Didn't manage to swi.

Then this morning cervix was slammed shut again. So presumed yesterday night was just a one off. Lo and effin behold I get ewcm in the work loos, am not sticking my fingers up my foof at work so am not checking again. But I bet it's wide open again. What am I to take from this?

I'll tell you what it means: my body hasn't got a fucking clue how to hatch an egg. Mixed messages all over the shop can only mean an anovulatory cycle.

So yet more swi needed. I just want to know if I have ovulated or not. And if not, am I going to or not. God, CD32 or whatever I should not still be having this conversation with myself.

FWIW loujalou I had acupuncture when ttc#1. The cycle I had it ended up being shorter than usual (35days) but annovulatory. I didn't have it the next cycle as it fell over the Xmas holidays, however that was the cycle I got a bfp! So perhaps it did something.

Sorry Digi about your cervix playing games with you .

Attempted charting and peeing on ov sticks but I'm drawing the line at checking cervix! Not sure what I'm looking for, for a start and knowing my luck either my hand would get stuck or my back would go and i would be stuck with my hands up my ladybits

Wow - this is such a good thread. Hello [waves] everyone.

WE've been TTC for 9 months now & trying to give the old sex life a kick start. TO make things worse I found out have PCOS so can't even predict the best days to get to it - we're trying every other day from now on.

I've stupidly given up chocs and booze for lent too [v silly move] but will be eating the biggest choclate brownie in history come easter

Happy weekend xxx

Hi Confuz, virtual chocs and booze definately don't count!

pmsl at image of Iced stuck in a cubicle...

Can you imagine the call to nhs direct

Lemon- hi need some assistance, got my hand stuck up my lady bum!

Nhs direct- are you alert? Can you breath? Have your lips gone blue?

Lemon- which lips? Can't see them but my hands have gone numb

ooooo oooo tooo much laughing.... my tummy hurts...

NHS: Can you summon outside assistance

Lemon: I can't get out of myself let alone the cubicle

NHS: Well how are you talking to us then?

????Stuck now... answers on a postcard please...

Polly the symptoms were dealt with better when I took clomid at night so thats my biggest advice. The symptoms were worst those few days & about a week afterwards! It did work to make me ovulate so I can;t fault it. Just the little bugger didn't stick or never met up with DH's boys!

Digi know what you mean. Not sure if I have had EWCM cos nothing when I go to the loo but it the bath it def felt a bit slippery down there (soz 4 tmi)! I just don't know whats going on!

Confuzz I have PCOS too! Bloody pain aint it!

PMPL Iced!!!!!

Hope everyone is having a good friday night!!!
xx

Message withdrawn

Message withdrawn

I have an image in my head now that I am not sure I can shake. Iced with her hands stuck up her lady bits. I think I might need counselling. You could call 999 and get a dishy fireman to saw off your hand so you can live a normal life again.

BTW the thought of checking my cervix - nope its not going to happen. Bad enough temping and OPKs also known as pissing on those darn sticks.

I do not recommend cervix chasing! It's my last resort, but has quickly become the bain of my life. I'm unable to examine any sort of change in cm now without having a quick rummage, I wish I could stop but i can't I need answers. Short of buying a flippin ultrasound machine and doing daily scans on my ovaries, it's my only way of at least knowing when I am officially late. I suppose I could just poas once a week, but how depressing to get bfn after bfn?

Anyway cervix update. No more ewcm and cervix was closed low and very firm this evening. So the yoyo-ing has stopped for now. And hopefully so has the bouncing of the creaky spare bed. I am going by 3dpo and sticking to it.

Wondered if my new found rummaging skills will prove useful if I ever manage to get pregnant again...'yes, yes I am now 5cm dilated so fill up the birthing pool...'

I phoned nhs direct using my hands free kit lol

Can you imagine all those firemen turning up while I've got my knickers round my ankles!!

I would also be worried about my cervix shutting while my fingers were up there, do you think your cervix is strong enough to chop off your finger?!!!

My message is leave your cervix to the pros, it can be dangerous in the wrong hands!

Hellooooo!

Wow it's very very quite here, hope you haven't all been having a rummage and got your hands stuck

Message withdrawn

Hi Lucy been at work only do a few hours a week so can't complain, but got home to find out washer has broke!! Which is all I need but have sent all my washing to mil, so my mission now is find a new one.
(washer not mil)
I was kept awake last night as dh has gotacold terrible disease!!

Hope you get a better nights sleep tonight . I usually medicate mine with medised works a treat.

Been too busy getting that image of you on the toilet knickers around your ankles with the foxy fireman trying to rescue you out of my head Iced to be able to type.

My DH is dying of man-fluenza but is well enough to go and get Dominoes - go figure.

Message withdrawn