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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Facebook status updates you wish you could write. XXXX...

504 replies

Tigresswoods · 11/04/2009 18:01

is fed up with seeing babies everywhere

OP posts:
Loujalou · 08/07/2010 21:25

Lissie are you more sicky than normal (clutches at straws).

Lou is feeling chirpier after her workout but still isn't suitably not relaxed enough.

TheLadyOfTheGreenKirtle · 08/07/2010 21:27

definately. i was really quite ill earlier. had a wave of nausea as we walked through asda. just got really, really hungry but cant stand the smell of the chicken pieces.

FancyALittle · 08/07/2010 21:36

Wishes certain people would shut up about how they're still smoking and drinking and not bothering to take folic acid...

NettyNooNa · 08/07/2010 21:54

Well where do I start??

Ok I'll start with this.

status update 1- For those who are LOLing because you've just had a shower or eaten the last of the chocalate cake or broke a nail or having a glass a wine, can I just ask? Are you really "lauging out loud?" I mean REALLY???

Status update 2- I've not taken my kids to the park, I've not baked cakes with them, no arts or craft session to keep them entertained or a woodland stroll.....reality is I've let them play on the X box for the last two hours whilst I sat reading the Heat magazine.........Sorry all you perfect mothers but please stop lying!!!!!!!!

FancyALittle · 08/07/2010 21:59

NattyNooNa
Do mums really get all snarky and competitive?! I don't want that :-((!

chenge · 08/07/2010 22:29

after reading a lot of the posts here,i went to my facebook page and DELETED all pics of my beautiful DD,not bcoz i write all those crazy updates,but bcoz she is lovely and when she was born i had to post the pics or had to SEND them by post to relatives and i had no time for that,,a no no,,how ever everyone has seen her,so maybe some of my friends are TTC and its taking longer,seeing all the comments about how gorgeous DD is ,is not gonna help,just being nice really,,

emptyshell · 09/07/2010 10:44

Facebook's the problem in how it's set out - not your pictures. I tried to suggest that they had some kind of option to toggle photo albums popping up in your news feed - for everyone, not just for those who struggle with baby photos (a friend posts about 30 pictures of her horse a week, and, try as I might, I just can't appreciate the beauty of her horse's bottom)... no joy.

I'll confess I tend to adblock baby/scan photos when they pop up - the comments I can deal easily with (apart from nasty mummyjacking of status updates with the whole "you can't know how hard life is until you've had kids" - well yeah, but you can't know how crap infertility is, and I didn't relay you with status updates about me bleeding my miscarriage out down the loo), it's the unexpected bouncing of someone's scan photos back onto your news feed page when you're not expecting it - because Great Aunt Doris has finally found them and commented "awww he looks like he's picking his nose" or something... which bounces the whole set of pictures, that you've seen and struggled with before... back up.

I just wish there was a toggle to allow/disallow photoalbum pictures in feeed - even just to speed up the speed the site loads when I'm on mobile internet... I did try to suggest it but just got helpfully told by some nice lady, the general comment of "I have two beautiful children, if you're infertile delete yourself from facebook because we're more fabulous than you and you're just a bitter, jealous old cow."

Yep. I'm bitter, jealous, hurting - I'm human, I'm a woman and bits of my body, that have annoyed me on a monthly basis, jiggled when I ran for the bus, cost me a fortune in blooming contraception... they don't freaking work. I feel subhuman enough - thanks for reminding me I'm not part of the cool planet group.

StormTTCbabyNo1 · 09/07/2010 17:05

FB Status: CD28 and AF arrived at 10am this morning just as predicted, my body is like clockwork, I hope this is a good sign for the next cycle. Where's the vino?

Loujalou · 09/07/2010 19:51

[Passes Storm the left over Pimms]

Lou has her ultrasound on 20th July. Should be about 10 dpo so not sure if that is a good thing to see my barren empty womb.

TheLadyOfTheGreenKirtle · 10/07/2010 15:44

lissie is no longer pregnant.

Loujalou · 10/07/2010 15:54

Lissie hey here's a big hug and hair stroke. Sorry to hear your news. Passes big bottle of vodka x

Loujalou · 10/07/2010 15:55

Lissie hey here's a big hug and hair stroke. Sorry to hear your news. Passes big bottle of vodka x

PussinJimmyChoos · 10/07/2010 17:45

Oh Lissie - am so so sorry

LilRedWG · 10/07/2010 19:44

So sorry my love. xx

liahgen66 · 10/07/2010 22:39

oh lissie, bollox, i am so sorry to read this again. Hope you are well supported in rl. x

StormTTCbabyNo1 · 11/07/2010 08:22

LISSIE I'm so sorry to hear your news hunny, my heart goes out to you and your DP.
xxxx

TheLadyOfTheGreenKirtle · 11/07/2010 16:54

thank you all. no real surprise, exactly the same thing happened again.

Loujalou · 12/07/2010 13:25

Hey Lissie hope you are keeping well.

FB Status - Lou remembered that sex can be fun and pre-seed was worth every penny.

StormTTCbabyNo1 · 12/07/2010 13:30

FB Status - What the feck is Pre-seed??

I do apologise for my ignorance, I'm still learning can someone please enlighten me???

Loujalou · 12/07/2010 13:31

Its a lube that doesn't stop the sperms swimming. We need lube otherwise sex life is crap as DH has tight foreskin.

See you would never get this on FB!

StormTTCbabyNo1 · 12/07/2010 13:36

Thanks Loujalou

FB Status: Storm is a Plank and thinks that this is much better than FB....

PussinJimmyChoos · 12/07/2010 20:09

FB Status: Puss is rather down and confused...two BFPs yest but today, BFNs. Not sure whether it was urine concentration to blame(drank a lot last night due to hot weather) so FMU wasn't that concentrated or chemical pg

Loujalou · 13/07/2010 09:21

Fingers crossed Puss.

FB Status - managed to scar her DHs penis with over vigorous sex. Now no more sex til its healed.

PussinJimmyChoos · 13/07/2010 18:27

FB Update: Puss is still having BFN

I fear flo is around the corner...fucking bitch

Loujalou · 13/07/2010 18:39

Fucking bitch indeed.

Still about 10 days of my 2ww to go.

Do you think if I am preggers they will be able to see anything on the scan next week. I hope not cos that would be too depressing if there is nothing there.