First Timers TTC. Safe space for brain dumps, questions, whinges and celebrations. Part 2!

[TinyDancer91]

Hi All.

This is a continuation from my past thread, but no need to go read that one if you're new here!

Quick TD;LR from the old post (but with up to date info) - I'm 31, OH is 35. We are TTC baby #1. Been TTC since Jan 2022, now on cycle 14. Haven't told anyone to avoid pressure.

Feel free to post any questions, thoughts, whinges, celebrations, basically anything here!

Going to try to be a bit more positive than I was toward the end of the last thread 😂

Love & baby dust to all. Wishing for BFPs for everyone this year 💖

@Yolo23
I see, how do you feel about starting this journey? You said earlier that you did all the tests but they couldn't find anything wrong? I hope everything goes well for you. Sending you baby dust!💓

Hi all,

taking my time to catch up with the thread.

first time ttc here as well, I’m turning 29 next month and DH is 27 turning 28 at the end of the year. Onto cycle 3, just had my surge yesterday so today is ovulation day and officially starting TWW again tomorrow.

sorry to hear the struggles some are having, hopefully investigations/medications/procedures will help to get your bfps.

sending baby dust to all ✨

@ceruleansky really excited! To be honest, I’ve always known we’d have trouble. I say there’s nothing wrong in terms of tests etc but I have got endometriosis diagnosed - I’ve had two operations for that and my ovary was fixed to my womb so it’s probably had an impact of some sort! I appreciate your well wishes xx

It's amazing to see your excitement and positivity! 😊 oh really! I've never heard of this.. hmm I'm glad you're better. Take care of yourself!!

Hey Everyone,

I got a very faint positive today. Not convinced it isn’t an evap line but trying to stay positive and will test in a few days if still no sign of AF.

I think of you all often and hope you are all doing well 💜

Ooh fingers crossed @Ditzydaisychain. Do update us in due course.

14dpo and I took a test today. My cycles are usually 45 days but I'm at cd30 because I'm on medication. Last month it was 30 day cycle.
Anyway I can't tell if this is an evap line or real. Or if I just have line eyes.
I couldn't capture it properly on my phone, it's a lot more visible to the naked eye.

I'm thinking evap line because it's not even slightly pink. Anyway, let's see if AF arrives. 😅

@Ditzydaisychain Do you have an update? 😄

@ceruleansky i can see something. It’s a squinter but there’s something there!

Unfortunately I don’t have a happy update. I took another test yesterday morning and my line was darker, so I started to get hopeful, but then I got a sharp stabbing pain in my lower right back last night and I knew AF was likely on her way. Arrived this morning. So after 7 days late I am out.

@Ditzydaisychain
Oh nooo.. what does it mean when it gets darker like that.. :( that must have been tough. Do you usually get it late? It's okay we just keep moving forward. 💓

AF is here! I'm out for this month 🫠

Gosh. I had to idea that conceiving was so hard (I myself am on cycle 12 with zero pregnancies so far). I hope you’re both kind to yourselves today @Ditzydaisychain and @ceruleansky; it must be very disappointing for you to have had that hope and then have it be a false alarm. Unmumsnetty hugs.

@Feliciacat
It is hard!! Hope you get some good news soon!

I keep thinking that my body can still do a lot of things that other bodies can't so I'm grateful. And, you know, I'll take care of it and try my best to conceive but if it's not happening for us, it's just something we have to live with.. 😅

Movies have definitely warped our idea of getting pregnant. They do it once and boom!! Pregnant. Real life is so different.

I wish I had gotten married earlier though and tried for a kid in my 20s but eh, such is life. 🤣

@ceruleansky I am sorry it wasn’t your month.
I’m assuming I had a chemical pregnancy. I felt okay yesterday but have felt a bit teary today.
This is the latest I have been reaching day 7 before AF arrived. I’ve made myself a promise that I will not test now until over a week has passed. The latest I have been previously was 4/5 days.

@Feliciacat thank you that unmumsnetty hug means a lot 💕 how are things with your DH?

@Ditzydaisychain
That's quite possible.. it's so unpredictable and it's a roller coaster of emotions. You don't know when it's okay to be happy. That's a good point, even I've decided to wait to test.
Do you plan to do anything differently next month?
I really don't know how to increase chances of a positive result. I've been going for walks every day and restricting my diet.
My husband has diabetes which has caused motility issues for him, so even that could even be the reason. He's started medication now, finally.

@ceruleansky well, I dare say that it’s better to have children with fertility treatment with the right partner than have children easily with the wrong partner. I’m sure having children later is the better decision for you. I hope you are successful soon.

@Ditzydaisychain sadly, I suppose it must have been a chemical pregnancy. At least it shows you can conceive though? Maybe that’s some small comfort.

Thank you for asking about DH! He hasn’t had a semen analysis yet but will have one at the end of October. He has had a lot of prostate pain and we wondered if he’d also got a varicocele or a major prostate problem so he paid to see a private urologist. The urologist discovered there was a varicocele but says it won’t be affecting his sperm as it’s only 2mm. He also found no infection in the prostate so told DH that it was basically all in his head but that he’d do a pelvic MRI just to reassure him.

Well…the MRI shows a bowel fistula! No wonder he’s been exhausted and in pain! He’s seeing a colo-rectal specialist about it. I wonder if the fistula could be affecting fertility if it perhaps runs from the bowel to the prostate. The semen analysis will be interesting. My bloods came back fine so I don’t think it’s female factor infertility. Fingers crossed for some results and treatment for DH!

I’m going into all this detail in case it helps anyone else. There are all kinds of health issues that can affect things!

@Feliciacat very true!! I've been with the same person since I was 18. We got married at 31. :)

Bowel fistula sounds painful!! Hope your DH feels better with the treatment! It's fantastic news to hear that your blood work is clean. Hoping for good things to come soon! 💗

Hello everyone! I hope you’re keeping ok ❤️✨

I’m currently no signs of AF but I’ve avoided testing just yet. As works been a bit chaos and stressful this month, amongst other things, I’ve no clue when I ovulated - we only DTD once but I’m fairly certain it wasn’t within the right window - although timing is uncertain now with the lateness of AF.

I’ve got endo so normally my periods (just before) are extremely painful. I’ve not had nothing yet, or no spotting. As I’m only something like cd27, I’m going to hold out for a few more days - I always have VERY sore boobs and I have nothing so I’ve no clue what’s going on! X

Sorry I’m CD28 today.

My previous cycles were…
Aug - 25 days
July - 25 days
June - 27 days
May - 30 days

so I’m a bit all over the shop - I’ve always had a few days of spotting. Strange it’s not arrived yet! Bizarre but no doubt will make an appearance…

@Feliciacat yes as weird as it sounds I have taken it as a slight positive. I’m trying to think okay so I have possibly done it. Can I do it again?!

Gosh your poor DH. I’m glad the doctor was thorough enough to do further checks. Will he be waiting long to find out about his bowel?
It’s really interesting (not sure if that’s the right word so apologies!) to read about your DH. My DH is convinced he is the problem as he has a varicocele. I’ve told him this doesn’t mean anything and to go get further checks.

Great to hear your bloods came back fine. It’s one less thing to worry about, 2 of my friends have had great success with ICSI and pregnant on first round. Both needed to go down the IVF route for their second babies due to male infertility.

@ceruleansky I’ve been with my DH almost 11 years and I have had thoughts of why didn’t you have babies years ago you silly woman. But the reality is we were not ready and we have had such a wonderful life together. I don’t know if we would be where we are without those years so I am trying to not think like that. I’m sure we will have our time soon 💕. I’ve started going to the gym to try and live a healthier lifestyle. I have the added complication of suffering from an eating disorder when I was a teen. So I beat myself up a lot that this could be the issue, although my periods never stopped so I’m hopeful I didn’t ruin my body.

@Yolo23 my cycles are a bit like yours so it’s hard to get excited, or really know what’s going on, until you are really late. I have everything crossed for you that it doesn’t make an appearance.

@Ditzydaisychain it’s horrible isn’t it! I’m also super stressed atm so it may be that my cycles are off simply because of this … ugh! I took a test earlier (more to just prepare myself) and it was BFN as expected. I’m at the stage now where I just want it to arrive and be done with it 🤣

I’m sorry to hear about your experience. I had a chemical back in November last year which was a little bitter sweet as I was happy that I’d got to that stage.. but here we are almost a year later 😅 life can be so cruel!

xx

@Ditzydaisychain
Aww that's so sweet!! 🥺 I hope you guys are blessed soon! Honestly that's a great decision because my gynecologist asked me to start exercising (I'm not overweight) but she asked me to at least take a brisk walk for 30 minutes every day.

Thank you for sharing about your ED. That must have been a really tough time. I'm glad you're doing better now and anything you do to keep your body healthy is going to help conceive.
I recommend also doing some yoga poses that are simple, if you don't (butterfly, bridge, yoni mudra).

Honestly I haven't moved the last 3 days because I was on my period but I usually walk to work so that's a4km walk every day. That's about the only exercise I do. 🤣

Hey everyone

I hope everyone is doing well.
I have some news to share although still early days.
I took a test at 9DPO and got a faint positive. I then took a digital one yesterday and it said pregnant 1-2 weeks.

I know I’d said I wouldn’t test early but my boobs really hurt, and my left one was noticeably bigger than my other one, so I went for it.

I’ve had an awful time at work the past few weeks so I’m so grateful for some joy 💕

Oh @Ditzydaisychain that is great news! Tentative congratulations! I hope work gets better. At least maybe you can go on maternity leave though!

@Ditzydaisychain
Congratulations!!! 🎊🎊🎊