Trying to conceive over 40 part 2

[October1979]

Here is a new thread for us girls

@Marvellouslymadmum And how are we supposed to fill the 2ww when we know there’s no chance? Just sit around and wait without pissing on internet cheapies and squinting, like a normal person? Madness!

@stuntbubbles that is total madness! And I don't suppose they even realise that even though you know there is not chance on a certain month that doesn't stop your head from saying 'well there still could be a tiny chance, what if you ovulated earlier or later than you thought?' 😂

Hahahhaa @stuntbubbles "I'm 105"!!! I honestly think they believe we have an endless supply of little eggies just sitting around up there waiting for the perfect time to make to baby.......

I lost it this month we're lucky if we have sex once in fertile week usually but I've been trying to hint that this isn't enough. Men being men my hints just weren't working so I was as blunt as I could be and he agreed he would try more this week. I swear if we don't get BFP this month I quit (not really)

@DOB78 we were the same up until about 8 months ago, he's always not be in the mood by the time we got to the fw and maybe did it once but I ended up having words with him and he's been a lot better the last few months thankfully!

Hi everyone am new here :) Am turning 41 next month and have been TTC baby No.2 for a few years but doesn't seem to be happening. Have booked an appointment with a fertility specialist in 2 weeks time

@KJD81 hi and welcome, have you had any tests done with your gp yet?

[quote Marvellouslymadmum]@KJD81 hi and welcome, have you had any tests done with your gp yet? [/quote]
Hi there, 👋, my GP did a full blood count and said that my LH and FSH were "normal" but she didn't actually say what they were but said I can get a print out, so I'll get that before my appointment. She said all the other hormones and results were normal. They also did an ultrasound check and said that was normal too

@KJD81 ahh that's good so at least you've had a start on it all

@Marvellouslymadmum Yes, she seemed reluctant to do anything further. Am tracking ovulation and taking Proceive supplements so not sure what else I can do really

@KJD81 it's difficult some gp's are far more helpful than others!

@KJD81 Hi and welcome to the group. Hope you get some answers at your appointment.

Well after my hopefully TTC month it failed, only managed DTD CD9 think O was CD12 don't think we've got much chance thus month. OH was feeling the pressure and couldn't finish we had a massive argument about it and decided we weren't trying anymore. I've calmed down now but I need to be relaxed about trying/planning without trying and planning I just don't know how to..........sorry for being a negative nelly

Hope everyone else is doing alright on their journeys xxx

Hi @KJD81 welcome! Hope the appointment went well (if you've had it already)

Hey @DOB78. I know exactly what you're feeling. I've heard of so many stories of ladies who decided to just relax and that's the month they got pregnant. In fact, when I was talking to my best friend about my TTC journey (she's 42 in a couple of weeks and she gave birth to her second son 8 months ago), she said the best thing she did was not try. It's so hard though!

It's been a crazy month for me. Ovulated late I believe, dtd numerous times, then did the usual stressing in the TWW and taking pregnancy tests whilst feeling all the symptoms. I'm now 15-16dpo and took a FRER test this morning and BFN. Cried and regretted not starting my TTC sooner (it's my first one). Then got over it and thought I'd used the last hpt that I had, just for the sake of it(but still secretly hoping lol) and of course BFN. I wiped and saw blood so it looks like AF is here.
So tiring emotionally and physically. It's beginning to put a strain on DP and I's relationship as now, he's mentioning finances for IVF and that we don't have enough saved if we were to start it. It's so much.

Sorry to ramble. Looking forward to hearing some good news on this thread soon ❤️☺️

Hi everyone and welcome to the group. It's good to see new people joining. I've not been on in a while. Since turning 42 in October that clock has been ticking louder and took some time away to try and stop obsessing. I'm 9dpo today. Took a test and bfn. I keep looking thinking I see a shadow. But pretty sure I'm just trying to see it. It's a really tough road. I'm still trying to have baby no1 too. And continually beat myself up for not trying in my 30s. I started this thread a week before my 41st birthday after a MMC and since I've had 4 chemicals and another MMC in August with twins. I'm starting to feel it will never happen and my eggs are no good. Anyway rant over. Let's hope I am wrong and we all get good news on here soon xxx

Hi @October1979
I'm so sorry to hear what you've been through. It must have been so tough. xx
You're only 9dpo so you're certainly not out of the game. So maybe give it another few days and see.
I totally wish I could turn back time and begin trying in my 30s. I'm hoping that I have good eggs too! If this is any hope though, my best friend who I mentioned in my previous post, has fibroids, PCOS and is overweight and she gave birth not too long ago. The odds were against her but one of her eggs was good. She was 41 when she did. So there's still hope xx

It's tough isn't it @TTCat40 fingers crossed for us both xx

Don’t beat yourself up, @October1979 – what’s done is done and the past is the past, and if you weren’t trying then, presumably that was for a reason.

@DOB78 and @TTCat40 - I hear you on trying to have a relaxed month but I don’t think I have the “relaxed about TTC gene”. I stress more if I’m not weeing on an OPK!

And I’m stressed enough in this TWW to start testing at 6dpo even though I know better! I had the squintiest of squinters last night (7dpo) on a cheap Freedom dip stick from Sainsbury’s, so today I went ABSOLUTELY MENTAL and ran off to the loo in secret approx 10,000 times and pissed on everything (test-wise, not the bath mat) including a digital (lunacy) and of course all negative as they would be at 8dpo on, er, a half hour hold and merrily hydrating. Have fully gone over to the bad place and keep going to check on my little collection of dried sticks like they’re substitute babies, FFS. Someone sit on me until 48 hours have passed/I can get a FRER.

Thanks @October1979. We're going to get it this year!

@stuntbubbles thank you for making me laugh! 🤣🤣. I'm so like that as well. Keep taking out my dried test sticks to check loool! To be honest, having a relaxed attitude towards TTC is going to be almost impossible, especially with a DP like mine, bless him. We both want this so much. December, I went absolutely nuts with OPKs and pregnancy testing. I was testing in the morning, at work and then when I got home. It was so heartbreaking seeing the bfns that I really calmed down this month. But I was counting down the days that I could test. Can't wait to actually get a BFP and have a little bean that sticks!

@stuntbubbles you talk much sense and you are making me laugh too! I thought I was bad using 2 frers at 9dpo. But you have definitely taken it to another level. I too want to pee on everything. It makes you feel as if your taking control of something you have absolutely no control over. The 2ww is a killer. Will keep my fingers crossed for you this month xx

They’re sold in two-packs because we’re meant to do both! You wouldn’t eat just half a Kit-Kat, same logic applies to FRERs x

Ah ladies thankyou for being here with laughs, honesty and understanding. I'm sure we will all get what we're hoping for.
In the meantime we'll piddle on every stick we can find then refuse to throw it away just in case it changes to positive while we aren't looking!!
Talking of POAS 8dpo decided to take a cheapie BFN of course 🤡 but here's hoping.

It is funny how obsessive it can be. Last month I had covid on my fertile week and my husband was negative and staying well clear of me. I ordered a home insemination kit and had him leaving me jars at the door. Needless to say it didn't work but couldn't not try - kept hearing a voice in my head telling me that month could be the golden egg 😂. It was a laugh if nothing else x

@DOB78 sorry to hear your having a tough time, it's hard to not put the pressure on them sometimes but then others there isn't enough pressure and they're not fussed 🤷🏼‍♀️

@TTCat40 sorry it looks like af arrived for you, we can't afford ivf either, our only chance maybe doing it abroad so we may look into that as it's so much cheaper and there are some great places with brilliant results too

@October1979 hi, it's so hard with that clock ticking away! I'll be 43 in two months and I feel like every month my chances are getting less and less - jars at the door though 😂 that's some genius!

@stuntbubbles you made me lol with the bath mat comment 😂 having tests around is a nightmare!

@stuntbubbles hahahha this is true!! I knew there was a good reason they were sold in pairs.......

Hi @October1979 I have also inseminated when ttc even when I’ve been healthy…. It actually has worked for me… as one month I did nothing but inseminate and got a bfp. Btw I can’t remember if I asked Have you had a hycosy/hsg to check fallopian tubes? Reason I ask is I was able to get pregnant as one side wasn’t blocked but the other side had a hydrosalpinx which may have been causing my miscarriages.

Am going for an operation in 5 days to treat the tubal blockage/hydrosalpinx on my left side.

This has more traffic than the other 40 thread

This is positive right? I think I'm going crazy