TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 30 - huddle up and bring on the BFP's

[Lilimum7]

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Welcome to the 🐧 huddle. This is a wonderful supportive group for anyone ttc after the loss of a pregnancy or baby. Together we can get through the ttc crazyness xx baby dust to everyone xx

Thank you to everyone that has given me support on this thread. I understand that hearing about pregnancy can be upsetting but try not to push people over to the other thread too soon. I would also like to say that the pain of losses doesn't make any of this easy whether you have a living child or not and just because parents moan about there children it does not mean that they are not loved and appreciated. Summoning the strength to look after my toddler after my stillbirth was the hardest thing I've ever done and yes I have moaned about her as most parents of toddlers will at some point. Yes I am lucky to have her but it doesn't make the grieving process any less painful. I wish you all the best of luck and hope to see you all on the other thread soon.

Distressing day today. 18 days on from my MC and 4 days after taking a very much negative pregnancy test I've started bleeding a fair bit and (apologies for tmi) passed a lump of something about two inches wide. I rang the early pregnancy / miscarriage unit who just seemed confused at the fact I was experiencing this after a negative test but way too early for AF. They've just told me to test again (???) on Thursday when I'm up to the three week mark and then give them a call. Not quite sure what this is meant to achieve but just wish I could get on with life and start to TTC again! We DTD yesterday so not sure if this is what made this happen?
Has anyone experienced similar?

Hi ladies. I've been absent like @TinyPaws as I just wasn't in the headspace for all the BFPs on this thread. I'm so so so thrilled for each and every single one of you, more than any of my friends in RL because you have ALL been through the shit. It's just a defence mechanism I can't control and I hate feeling jealous so I've been skimming a bit.

I'm CD13, it's my first month of using easy at home and premom after @Lilimum7 recommended. Just got a blazing positive on OPK after two days of EWCM and the physical back ache suggests I will probs ovulate tomorrow, DTD the PST dew days, this afternoon and will try for tues and weds as well 🤞🏼

@Navy123 I've decided to take baby aspirin without being told to. I had PE in later pregnancy with DS and took it then from 32weeks. I was REALLY dubious because I was so so so careful with DS and I didn't want to take drugs so my consultant gave me loads of research on how it affects baby/mum and I've found that helpful to read through. I have a friend under RMC and her consultant prescribes everyone baby aspirin at first meetings so I figured why not. It's a controversial one so I'd do a bit of your own googling and see what you think?

Hope you're ok @strawberrye @AliceRR @fnej01 xx

Oh dear, just to clarify when I suggested a new thread I meant in addition to this one. No one should feel like they have been bumped off, please do stay here if you need a hand hold in early pregnancy. We are here for you. It’s just there was always a Pregnant after loss thread on mumsnet but it seems like that has ended. My suggestion was so that you could all support each other going forwards throughout your pregnancy. You are all welcome here but you also need your own space to support each other and talk openly without the worrying about upsetting anyone who has recently miscarried, or excited newly pregnant women in the antenatal clubs. I feel terrible that people may not feel welcome, absolutely the opposite of what I meant. Apologies if I’ve upset anyone, very sorry.

@Lilimum7 I’m sorry you feel so down. Cd1 is the worst but you will pick yourself up. I’m awaiting the same and it feels crap, but we will do what we usually do- dust ourselves off and try again.
@fnej01 yes I’m seeing him mid July for the first time, but it’s an NHS appointment. I’ve heard that one of the tests means you can’t ttc for 2 months- is that correct? That would be a bit depressing but if it’s necessary we will do it.
@Avocuddles hmm I have heard of this happening post miscarriage. I don’t think it’s uncommon but perhaps you could call your gp for more reassurance? It could be an infection.

@Bluebelltulip I'm sorry if I upset you it was not my intention x
@frillyfarmer how are you getting on with the app hun x
@Indreamland good luck lovely Fx for a sticky bean
@Mistymeow I'm sure I will be OK once my poas obsession kicks in again in 4 days. Its just hard not actively doing something.
@CodlingMoth @VenusStarr @Russkispy @MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue @KnitKitty @Yukka @Boboelephant @Beaglemum93 @strawberrye @TinyPaws @moonpeace @hayleyfx @Navy123 and everyone I didn't tag how are you all getting on?

Just sat reading the thread and look up and the weather presenter has a huge baby bump. Can't escape it anywhere.

@Lilimum7 sorry you are feeling down, sending hugs.

@Frillyfarmer I don't know if you saw my post the other day but Dr Shehata also advises low dose aspirin to all patients from their first appointment. I told him I took it in my third pregnancy and still miscarried and he said that if I took it from BFP it wouldn't have made a difference as it takes 6 weeks to get in your system, so good that you are taking it already.

@AliceRR how are you doing?

@Mistymeow Dr S just said to hold off ttc until we had our results at the end of June. I think sometimes the nhs say about the full thrombophillia test as it can sometimes throw up a false positive if you have been pregnant in the last 12 weeks. But when I saw Dr S last week it was only 4 weeks post MC and he did all my bloods including thrombophillia. Hope that's helps.

Best of luck to those with the BFPs leaving the thread🤞

Thanks for those asking after me. I’m on CD2 (although af already seems to be easing off) and have a cold so feel a bit bleurgh)

@Frillyfarmer yeah I've heard of people being told to go straight on it - I don't know if having carried one to term though might affect whether it would be right. Anyone else know if baby aspirin should be taken if you've previously had a successful pregnancy? Interesting @Pop1234 that it takes 6 weeks to work.

@Lilimum7 Thanks for asking. I'm doing much better emotionally this week. Still lots of worries, but I'm not feeling over-whelmed by them right now. I've got my first scan on Friday and bricking it. Dreading it because I'm expecting bad news. But can't wait for it because I want it to be over and done with (and 2% hopeful for a miracle).
How are you? I know you've started a new cycle, and that always makes us feel shit. But I honestly am hopeful for you getting a rainbow. I'm feeling positive about you going through RMC at the moment. The waiting for appointments is the hardest part... Try to have something each week until then to look forward to or plan so that the time passes quicker.

I am certain none of you meant to make anyone feel unwelcome, and I didn't take it that way. I remember a few months ago when there were a few weeks of a lot of BFPs I couldn't come on the thread as often because I just felt so left behind and hopeless, even though I was really, really happy for those who seemed to be moving on. And with my recent BFP I felt guilty after using the thread to vent about how distressed I was feeling and I haven't been on again much after that and felt a bit lonely with it all (I joined a FB group but it's not the same).
Yes, there is definitely a need for a sister thread, and that's exactly what it is. We're all still in this together. You were right to bring up the subject of reinstating a graduates thread; please don't feel awkward about voicing your needs. It's hard not to hurt anyone's feelings when we're all in situations which make us sensitive and on edge, but we all need to remember that we're here for each other. That's what's so lovely about this thread (and the new sister thread); it's a place of genuine support and care.
Hugs for everyone!

@Pop1234 that interesting about the aspirin, I was told to take it from bfp but I might just take it now instead what's the worst that can happen (oh yeah already been there so worth a try)
@AliceRR hello cycle buddy also cd2, mine is also easing off and I have the worst sore throat in a really long time. I'm putting it down to being rundown.

Please don't worry about it @Lilimum7 I know you are having a hard time, I really hope that you get some positive news soon.

@Navy123 I was prescribed baby aspirin in my second pregnancy as my first baby was small so yes it does get given to women who have had successful pregnancies. It seems to be becoming more common.

Thanks @Lilimum7 but it's over already.

Ladies, told you I'd be back. So I believe AF is literally just starting now. Just been for a wee and brown on panty liner and I knew I could feel it starting. I don't know how I feel. Really just fed up.

@Lilimum7 Yes we are cycle huddles again. I have had a sore throat for a few days now and it has turned into a full on cold today so hopefully yours doesn’t turn into anything

@KnitKitty hello hun I'm so glad your in a reasonably good place. Fx and tx for your 🌈. I hope that you don't mind but I'm watching the graduation tread as I'd like to keep up with all you ladies as most of you have been with me since I joined in thread 15. As for me yes I feel really low right now. I'm sure I'll pick up again as I always do. I've decided to take asprin now instead of waiting for bfp (can't be any worse than I've had so far). Please do pop on every so often to keep us up to date x

@InDreamland oh hun I'm so sorry ( Fx it's just bean getting comfy and brown usually means old blood but I totally understand how you feel given your previous mc's and test results)

@AliceRR I hope your feeling better soon and Fx mine will not progress x

@InDreamland oh no, I'm so sorry you are going through this anxiety. Have your other two losses happened at a similar time to this or have you got further on? Could it be IB?

@Lilimum7 I know how you feel with what's the worst that can happen. Worth giving it a try though.

Cycle buddies @Lilimum7 not cycle huddles 🙈 Thank you. Are you OPKing this month? What day do you start? My CB app is suggesting CD10 but that seems late 🤷🏻‍♀️

@InDreamland I’m so sorry I didn’t see your update before. I really really hope it is nothing wrong / just IB. Brown could just be spotting and I believe it’s not that unusual xx

@AliceRR yes I'm opking but not temping I don't think it's stressing me out to much. My cbfm says to start cd6 but I might just start Cd8 to save sticks they are so expensive, but I will start my easy@home strip tests early just to satisfy my poas needs lol don't mind wasting the cheaper ones. My DH jokingly said he's going to put a log in the garden as I seem to have a need to poas all the time, he said it's free and I can pee on it as much as I like, Needless to say I gave him a dead arm 😂

@InDreamland so sorry you're experiencing this. Fx that it's not what you think xx

Thanks for the tag @Lilimum7 I'm OK, nothing much to report here. Af is due next week (while I'm on holiday) stocked up on painkillers and tampons. Looking forward t getting away from everything and having a proper break.

I like the idea of the graduate thread, gives me hope. I have struggled hearing about bfps, they do give me hope that it might happen for me but struggle with feeling left behind.

@InDreamland I'm sorry to hear you're spotting, keeping my fingers crossed your bean is getting snuggly

How you doing @AliceRR?

Hope everyone else is doing OK.

@AliceRR forgot to ask when do you usually ovulate. I have no idea now. Since my mc in January it's been all over the place between cd10 and cd15

@Lilimum7 I'm good, thanks for asking. I had my 12 week scan today and all was well but I'm really anxious still as my first died at 12+2 and I'm only 12+1 today so it could still all go wrong. How are you doing? I'm sorry to hear you're having a hard time, the aspirin hopefully will help!

To the people worrying about "kicking the bfps off", please don't worry, it works out better for all of us and we've all been there feeling left behind so I don't think anyone is offended. Hopefully everyone will move over to the graduate thread soon! x

@Beaglemum93 great new so far hun. I love to hear about yours and others updates it keeps my hope alive. Tbh hun I'm very worried about my cycles. Since my mc and erpc in January my cycles have gotten longer, my periods shorter and lighter, I've had another cp and my temps arnt going up very much after ovulation. It's been 4 months since the last erpc but I've not felt right since. I've asked for an ultrasound or an internal camera to check for scar tissue but the gyno doc doesn't seem to think its necessary. I'll just have to wait and see what rmc results say in August.