35+ TTC#1 Thread 4

[BambiOnIce80]

We're very close to maxing-out our previous thread, so time to start afresh 🙂

To borrow the intro from @Blondcat (our old threads founder):

A wonderful bunch of ladies supporting each other through the ttc journey when trying for a first baby after 35.

Good luck all!! 🍀🤞🏻🍀🤞🏻

@carley32 I was just taking folic acid, vit d, zinc and coq10. The Coq10 is meant to help egg quality so figured it was worth a shot as getting older. Stopped the coq10 as soon as got bfp but carried on the others. Dh was also taking zinc and coq10.

I love the idea of sneaking maca powder into cakes lol 😂 My DH is taking the well man tablets & I’m taking the well woman ones and ubiquinol. I’m thinking we might give ttc in November a miss and start again in December, but i’m not sure. Or maybe take a relaxed approach.... Really want to try the monitor though! I’m feeling healthier now & will start my exercise classes again next week, but I’ve got some stressful stuff coming up at work (lesson observations & the like). Ttc & stress is not the best combination and tends to lead to a uti. I really want to avoid another one!

Haha @pixieN yeah I know, maca-dosing by cake was probably a bit devious, but he's a GP and very skeptical of all of the supplements I was shoving down his neck, so this seemed like an easy way of getting it down him! It tastes totally grim raw but blended quite well with banana (made it kind of malty) and stronger flavoured cakes like chocolate.

Also (and I'm aware this is deffo tmi but could be useful), we found it totally bloody knackering having a full shag each time so sometimes resorted to a kind of wank and mount system That probably gives you all the info you need to know, but essentially if we really couldn't be arsed to shag properly I'd get him close with my hand and then hop aboard for the crescendo! ROMANTIC.

Thanks ladies. So I’m not doing to bad with the vitimins, just maybe need to add some cq10.
Although DP is relatively active and I make balanced meals through the week, he doesn’t try so hard when it comes to cutting down on caffeine and trying to chose the healthier option when He is fending for himself 🤨🙄.

It’s so hard to not turn into a complete nag!

Both are biggest downfall is definitely work related stress. 🙈

@Noodella18 😂😂 i don’t think there’s many opportunities when ttc that can be made romantic 😴.

@Noodella18 ‘wank and mount system’ and ‘hop aboard for the crescendo’ has really made me 😂😂😂 ttc is not for the faint hearted that’s for sure! 😁 😂

I’ll make some banana cake tomorrow

I’m loving the secret fertility cakes. 😂

I did get my husband to watch his caffeine and alcohol intake but neither were particularly high. And his weight has always been in a good range (unlike mine). I think that does have an impact on fertility. Actually there was something in the news about how some trusts have BMI limits for men too when offering IVF. So that’s something to consider.

The cycle that worked for us was the one where we DTD the least. I thought we were out because we only managed the one time.

Fantastic news on the full steam ahead scans @Noodella18 and @Melamine 💖 Yours will be here before you know it @Kescilly and @Blondcat 🙂

@Noodella18, I lmfao at the "wank and mount" approach 😂🤣😂🤣 I can picture my DP's face already when I gently suggest it to him in times of need 😆

@79andnotout; LH: 3.7 (range 2-9), FSH: 6.4 (range 3-10) & progesterone not offered on CD0-5 bloods in my area. How's fertile week going for you?

@LeonieKate, that's exactly what happened to me - coil in for 2 years and periods got lighter (to be expected), but thought they'd go back to normal once it was out. Until they didn't 😕 Wonder if it's a coil thing or an age thing 🤔 Wishing you luck at the docs 🍀

Sorry for the work stress @PixieN 💐 I can sympathise! Make sure you look after yourself on your week off.x

Thank you for the get well wishes ladies - they might have actually worked! 😄 Feel much better today, which makes me think I was mistaking over-doing it on my run with viral nastiness 🙄 Lesson learnt- don't have another 3 month break from the running!

@Carley32, DP is from the mountainous geographical centre of Italy... so we're basically staying in the Birmingham of Italy 😏 Still haven't packed though! How's your week off going?x

Ladies you have made me giggle so much reading this! @Noodella18 thank you very much for your informative description I will be sure to suggest it to DP and enjoy watching him turn scarlet in embarrassment

I'm having a bit of a moment, hopefully you all can talk me down off a ledge.
It's now CD28 today. Have been having 26-27 day cycles the last few months. Started passing tiny amount brown stuff CD26, again yesterday and today a larger volume, with a small red clot, still really not enough to warrant a pad / cup etc. Tonight on wiping there is a bit of watery red stuff.
Ordinarily I'd just throw a tantrum and sulk and cry shrug and assume my period was starting. But I'm having quite a lot of pain in my left lower abdo. Dull constant ache with occasional breath-taking stabbing pain. I THINK this is due to the hassle I've been having with my back (which is loads better) but it's starting to turn my inner-symptom-spotting-psycho into a paranoid-hypochondriac-maniac and I have been googling appendicitis (wrong side dumbass! ) and now progressed on to ectopic pregnancies

I'd very much appreciate anyone more sensible or experienced with ectopics telling me I'm being ridiculous! As far as I can see the pain is caused by an embryo growing and therefore a 10 day old embryo is massively unlikely to be causing this? DP has been away for a few days and gets home in half an hour. I'm worried about telling him as he'll DEFINITELY think it's a massive drama and wind me up.

@Chelonia - do a test? Have you got one? If it's ectopic it will show up as a positive but I think it's likely far too early to feel anything like that anyway. Quite probably just a horrible AF :(

@BambiOnIce80 - those are great results! Your levels are less than half mine, no indication of perimenopause at all. That's great!

@Noodella18 that sounds like a great method to me. OH doesn't seem to rate my handjobs and doesn't like blowjobs (wtf?!) so it's just full sex for us which is a bit tedious. Previous boyfriends seemed more than happy with my skills so I think it's just his own hang ups.

We've had sex three times this fertile week and I'm bored now, no idea how anyone can keep this up. No sign of my ovulation though, it's really late. I think all the exercise I've been doing has sent my body into shock. Might take a month or so to realise I'm not dying!

OH is fit as a fiddle, and has always looked after himself (unlike me who does everything to excess), so I've not had to influence anything there. He's not taking his vitamins but says he doesn't need them and he's probably correct. His semen sample was excellent. I'm the haggard old one!

Glad everyone's pregnancies are progressing nicely.

@Chelonia your inner SSP might be doing you a favour, so let's not be so hasty! You know your body best and what is and isn't normal for you. Are we talking "OMG something is seriously wrong" kind of stabbing pain or a "hmmm, that's new but it doesn't feel like something's about to rupture" kind of stabbing pain?! Agree with @79andnotout - I'd do a FRER in the morning to rule things out (unless AF is in full flow by then, of course). A BFN doesn't necessarily rule EP out though, so if your stabbing pains get worse and AF stays away maybe call the doc?

I'm with you @79andnotout with the sex getting dull thing too. I always go into fertile week (which starts today) with a certain amount of optimism about DTD. 3 must be the magic number though because I'm thoroughly over it after the third time! 😂 We usually try to soldier on for a fourth, so I'm hoping being on holiday for some of it this time will help things along (DP seems much more up for it in other people's houses... whatever floats your boat, I guess! 😏).

Thanks girls, the stabbing has mostly gone away now (had been ongoing for about 3 hours so was stressing me out). So has the blood.... I'm trying to convince myself it's definitely AF mucking me about. I don't have any FRERs (have never actually taken a pregnancy test in my life!) so I guess I'll just try to chill out and not think about it. Off to bed now! So happy to read all the good news about our lovely ladies' pregnancies progressing well ❤

Did a true lol at wank & mount! And the sneaky supplement dosing. My OH is a boozer, he tends to binge, rarely drinks anything in the week but goes in at weekends - he has a very high tolerance though. I did make him cut down. He was crap at taking his multi vits. But it still worked!

Chelonia, way too early for ectopic but I was getting the pains on one side for ages - corpeus lutem producing progesterone apparently. Not to get your hopes up but sounds promising! :)

Keep shagging everyone else! I haven’t since we found out (paranoid post MC & OH not bothered) so you can make up for me!

@chelonia yeah I had prickly ovulation type pains for the first few weeks of pregnancy. If it were ectopic, whatever was burrowing in would be literally just a few cells so try not to worry - get the BFP first and then see how you get on. Even at 6 weeks (when it would just about show up on a scan and location could be confirmed) the embryo is only the size of a lentil and could be removed without damage to your fallopian tube.

@melamine haha glad to hear pregnancy is affecting other people's sex lives too. We've shagged probably 5 times in the last 8 weeks, most of the time I just want to curl up die because I feel so sick and can't think of anything worse than rhythmical movement (motion sickness, bleurrrrgh)

@Chelona glad to hear it’s gone down. I agree that it’s unlikely to be an ectopic but hopefully it won’t come back at all.

Well all the sex talk is certainly making me feel better, thought lightly there maybe something wrong with me and DP for not wanting to DTD so regular 🙈. But clearly ttc is a hard graft and mostly not a lot of pleasure 😂.

@Bambi oh really? I imagine any of Italy to be stunning and obviously great for food and wine! Plenty of time to pack 😂.
Lovely having time off. Been very productive so far, caught up with friends, dinner with family, full on spring clean in the house and atleast started the ironing. But feeling a bit guilty at the minute for sitting down watching trashy tv when I should really be, planning and then preparing for parents evening when back in work 😱. I should just do it so it doesn’t hang over me during the rest of the week. But lounging with Netflix is so good!

@Carley32 I'm soooooo jealous of your week off at home with Netflix. My usual 1.5 hour commute this morning took me 2.5 hours 😱. So wish I was at home with Netflix too ☕️🍰

Oh crikey @QuantumGirl!😰 And there was me feeling sorry for myself with my hour and 15 door to door! 😕 One good thing about Scotrail is that they don't seem to have that many delays/cancellations. Down south it was normal for my train to be at least 30 minutes delayed daily, so I feel your pain ✊

Don't feel guilty @Carley32 - Netflix was made for trash TV holiday fun 😄 We've been revisiting American horror story, given 'tis the season 👻🧟‍♀️🧛‍♂️

@Carley32 I’ve been lounging with Netflix too (and spending way too much time on mn ), though I managed to sort out 3 black bin bags of clothing for the charity shop - this is stuff i’ve had since a teenager that i’ve been keeping ‘just in case’ I miraculously get back into a size 8/10 lol 😆

I love Netflix. Started watching ‘Scorpian’ and recently watched ‘Girl on the Train’ which was good, but kind of resonated with the main character’s fertility woes. Much better than DH’s choice last night, which was a Nicholas Cage film (‘Looking Glass’ I think) and one of the worst films i’ve seen

@QuantumGirl - what a horrible commute! 😳😱

@chelonia another vote for one sided pain in the early days of bfp land.

@melamine same here scared to dtd since finding out as last time dtd and the next day had mc. Rational side says unrelated but worrier says don't do it. Though totally not feeling like it with the curl up and die nausea and sore boobs anyway!

Thanks all. Sadly in the middle of the night AF arrived on her broomstick with a vengeance. Massive mindfuck

Awww @Chelonia 😟 AF is a total bee-aitch. Why she has to mess with our minds and be so cruel, I do not know 😔

On the glass half-full side of things, are you going to be able to get your CD0-5 bloods sorted out this week? 🍷

Love reading this thread. Lurking mostly right now. Messed up this month and started opk testing too late I think. Negative, when this was the time of last months peak. Bleh. Feel like I can't be bothered right now, I floated the idea of pausing until January until I can get the hang of my cycles, and so I can avoid an August child (silly really) and also so I can enjoy Xmas. I think DP was a bit disappointed and wondered if we should be doing it at all. I see his point. I'm also just too stressed and knackered right now to dtd. Since I've missed the opportunity this month I'll just give up and go for nov/dec instead!

Lots of talk of Coq 10? What is this? DH and I both very healthy, we exercise, eat well and don't really drink but still ttc for over a year so if supplements could help I would be ready to try some!