35+ TTC#1 Thread 3

[Blondcat]

We seem to have filled up our last thread so here is a new one.

A wonderful bunch of ladies supporting each other through the ttc journey when trying for a first baby after 35.

Goodluck to all ladies we can do it

@BambiOnIce8 I enjoy the break from waiting too. CD2 here, so a little behind you. Lots to look forward to!

Welcome @Sessy19! Where did you go for your fertility MOT? Glad to hear it was all good news. There's a book on Amazon that you might be interested in if you're feeling impatient.

www.amazon.co.uk/Impatient-Womans-Guide-Getting-Pregnant/dp/1451620705?tag=mumsnetforum-21

I don't think it's easy to tell AF symptoms apart from BFP ones, unless something really unusual happens. I think if you're using Ovia the best thing would be to log all your symptoms and that way you can look back at a previous month to see if you were experiencing the same thing. Could help to keep you grounded (if that's what you want). Good luck this cycle!

@CNizzle I've been using my Fitbit to track heart rate as well and I find it fascinating! My sleep is all over the place so I can't temp, but my HR clearly shows when I'm ovulating and when I'm on AF.

I'm sorry about your loss, @InDreamland. That must be so difficult. It's smart of you to go for counselling and I hope that it gives you the support that you are looking for. Glad to have you here with us in this thread.

@Oxted2018 how fun! I'd love to hear how it goes.

Thanks @Kescilly. It's been hideous and think it will take many months to learn to cope with it, think the 20 week mark next Friday will be hard and don't know how I'll be on the due date. Desperate to be pregnant again now.

Has everyone found TTC has affected holiday destination choices too? Gotta watch where has Zika!

CD11 here so POAS time again!

@InDreamland I fully relate to the holiday destination dilemma. I got married in May and we are going on belated honeymoon in a few weeks. But all the places we really wanted to go have Zika! It is hard because you obviously have to go on living and can’t put everything on hold but at the same time you don’t want to take avoidable risks. We settled on Namibia in the end - interesting enough and seemingly Zika free! X

Welcome @sessy19 and @indreamland.

@InDreamland, what are the chances of yours and my DP's reservations about IVF being similar?! 😄

Oooh @Kescilly, sounds like we're going through this cycle together 🙂 Let's see if we can keep each other sane! 😉

@Oxted2018, I'm dying to know how POAS goes for you! Wishing you lots of luck 🤞 🍀

@Oxted2018 congratulations on your wedding! May is a great month to get married, I got married in May but 5 years ago. Namibia for honeymoon sounds amazing! We went to Hawaii. We had Costa Rica booked for November, then got pregnant, midwife said no way can we go with Zika there, so we decided to change to Seychelles instead as our babymoon, then had mc but changing to Seychelles still was good idea as otherwise can't start TTC again until May next year.

Thanks @Blondcat.

@BambiOnIce80 it's quite possible.

Morning!
I still have flashing smiley this morning but some EWCM too. Thought shouldn't have EWCM until static smiley?

@indreamland I get ewcm for anywhere from 3-5 days per cycle don't track ov by temp or opks but by cycle tracker app it is a few days before until ov day sometimes day after.

Thanks @Blondcat. Guess I'd not really paid enough attention to it before. I think I'm noticing things more since the mc.

@InDreamland I think EWCM is supposed to preceed ovulation and it's the watery stuff that turns up when you're ovulating/after to help DP's little swimmers along 👍

Thanks for the info @BambiOnIce80. I asked on the TTC after pregnancy loss thread too and some of same info came up there too.

Sorry to hear about your loss @InDreamland and hope you get your bfp soon

It’s extra hard when so many women seem to fall pregnant quickly - lots of pregnancy announcements on my FB, and 3 at work recently. Most of my friends already have families and are at a completely different stage to me. Some even have teenagers! I completely get the irony of trying to prevent pregnancy in your 20s and then finding it’s not so easy when you start trying in your 30s

Thanks @PixieN. It really does suck. Sad thing is more and more women are now waiting until their 30s because they've not met the right man yet or want to establish careers or get on the property ladder first. Then all those things in your 20s you were trying to avoid suddenly become almost it feels out of reach. The thought of being childless makes me so sad. Sure DH and I will enjoy what we do have but there'll always be a massive gaping hole.

Seeing and hearing of other pregnancies and births just fills me with grief. It was hard before I got pregnant but it's a million times worse now after the mc.

I want to get pregnant again asap - hope I can and hope it's a keeper.

I managed to do some shopping for a relative's child today. Sometimes it doesn't bother me at all but other times I see those little clothes and toys and think about how I've wanted to buy them for my own child for a decade now.

I worry that it's too late because I've never seen a BFP and suspect fertility issues. But I've never tried consistently enough to really know. I'm worried that by the time I know, it will be too late to do much about it. I used to want three kids, now I doubt if I'll have even one.

@Kescilly oh you must be finding it tough. I thought 5 years TTC was forever before I got my BFP which sadly ended in mc. I really feel for you and can relate to the feelings when buying kids stuff for relatives. Have you seen your GP and got a referral to gynae for tests yet? If not please get an appointment ASAP.

I have a static smiley face now on the CB OPK. I'm so relieved body seems to be getting back to 'normal' after the mc. Not v confident though after 5 years TTC the last one that I'll get pregnant again.

Didn't test and AF turned up this morning. Didn't expect any miracles straight after MC really. I don't see this as a failure though. Will just carry on what I've been doing with supplements and acupuncture and gearing up for the next cycle. got a couple of options to think about, including home insemination and IUI. Will make a decision later. Good luck to those in tww!

Sorry to hear that @Russkispy ... Onwards to next month but wounds like you've got a good regime going/planned! May next month bring a BFP

Good news you've got static smiley @InDreamland and so sorry you've had what sounds like an awful journey so far. Am sending all the positive vibes I can muster that good things go your way

Thank you @AstroKate ! Things become more positive when one has a plan B, and C, and so on.
Book first session of reflexology tomorrow. Throwing everything in and see what pans out!

Good luck @InDreamland, commiserations @Russkispy & PMA @kescilly! It’s not too late, keep throwing absolutely everything at it!

Not wanting hijack an important thread but you ladies seem like a lovely bunch.

I have an ongoing issue with work done by a bathroom fitter and wondering how to handle. Nothing crazy or dramatic...so I thought I'd post on AIBU. My god! The bile on some of the questions... insults, picking on posters spelling...one where a poor young mum was left in tears. Surely if you want to change someone's mind and tell then they ABU you would outline a constructive POV and not resort to childish name calling 😳

My experience so far on MN has been supportive and positive. Have I just uncovered the dark web of MN? No way I'm posting now-will ask a friend what they think!

Anyway...sidetracked - continued baby dust and success to all of us

@AstroKate - I was reading some of the AIBU threads yesterday and was stunned by some of the responses people post. So unhelpful and some were quite bullying. I think I may have read the same one by a poor Mum who was struggling with her 2 month old and the first page of replies was just people attacking her. I will stay in the safety of this group!!

Sorry to hear AF came @russKispy but good luck for reflexology. @Bambonice80 how did acupuncture go yesterday?

Am onto flashing smileys on my CB OPK so shall try and get some action in this weekend! Ava is changing its mind as to when I'm likely to be in FW but, given that it is only day 3 of using it, I don't think I should expect too much from it this month!

Good luck all x

@BambiOnIce80 Yes, onto more exciting things... also interested in how you found acupuncture?

@Oxted2018 I think we defo read the same post. Poor woman. As you are, I'll also be sticking to this safe space!

@Kescilly I went to Create Fertility in London, Bank area. It cost about £2-300, had internal ultrasound of ovaries and follicles (I think...my memory is terrible) and bloods for hormone levels. The consultant is probably used to seeing couples with longstanding TTC concerns, so his evaluation was that I’m in great shape ‘for my age’. Whatever that means!! 😂😂😂

Sorry, I should have clarified! We haven't been trying that whole time. I had an exH that swore he wanted kids, then kept putting it off. We had barely TTC'd when he decided he didn't want children and didn't want me. I'm remarried now but it's taken me a while to gain the courage to try again.

So I can't say that I definitely have fertility issues and am worried it will be too late if I discover that I do.

Right now I'm trying to focus on losing weight and increasing my fitness. I know that my weight affects fertility, it's been difficult to care about it for some time. When I was a healthy weight and the right age, no one wanted to have children with me!