35+ TTC#1 Thread 3

[Blondcat]

We seem to have filled up our last thread so here is a new one.

A wonderful bunch of ladies supporting each other through the ttc journey when trying for a first baby after 35.

Goodluck to all ladies we can do it

@Chelonia I’m a total cheese addict so a cheesy weekend sounds yummy to me. I had pizza last night which was delicious 😋

@kescilly sometimes random spotting can happen (ttc seems to make you hyper aware of everything, inc every twinge or anything that seems odd for a particular cycle) but I really hope it’s implantation bleeding too x

@kescilly I had random spotting last cycle about 5 days before af and got my hopes up that it was implantation bleeding sadly not. Ttc messes with your head and body but fx it is a positive sign for you x

@Chelonia I'm going completely off topic and need to know about these cheese parties! They sound awesome...how does this work? Got melted cheese in the middle that you can dip ANYTHING into? Now that's my kind of party!

I think I must be 4dpo (and due AF in 8) and this is only my first cycle...I'm already obsessing! Sore nipples?...feels around yup...kind off? Do I feel sick in the morning? Ermmmm... if I think about it enough then I can certainly make myself feel sick . God it's so easy to start symptom spotting and go mad. I don't know how I'm going to cope knowing it will probably take a while and doing this every month!

So at what dpo is testing recommended? And what brand? I've seen frer mentioned but don't know what this is?

Also, so sorry for questions but can someone explain implementation to me! Feel like a right numpty reading all the posts with this expression

And I realise it should be implantation... feel even more 'doh' now!

@astrokate we have all been there! Symptom spotting is normal but really not helpful as early pregnancy symptoms are so similar to af symptoms bloody mother nature playing with us. So not fair!

Implantation usually happens between 6-12dpo some people get some minor bleeding. It usually takes a couple of days to get a bfp after implantation so most people suggest 12dpo and later is best for accurate result from testing. I usually wait until af is late as slightly less disappointment (for me) than a very blank bfn.

You made me lol @AstroKate 😂

Implantation is when (if you have an embryo floating around in there) it buries itself into your womb lining. The literature is all of the place about which stage dpo this occurs, but the majority say between 7 & 9dpo (but can be as short as 6 or late as 12!). About 33.3% of women get an implantation bleed as a result of this - so it's not exactly uncommon but it doesn't occur in the majority of cases either.

As for early pregnancy tests (aka FRER's), if you're thinking of going for those then I'd recommend getting the ones that are sensitive down to 10IU/ml of HCG and not taking it until your first morning urine (FMU) of 12dpo. At this stage they're maybe 80-90% accurate. You can get them off Amazon and it should state in the description what level of HCG they're capable of picking up (I went for one step, just because they were cheap!). They're basically most reliable from 14dpo, which is the day of or after AF is due for most of us... the earlier you test, the higher your chance of getting a false BFN because the HCG produced by the embryo isn't high enough to detect. Sorry if you didn't need this level of detail, but I work in a lab so it's a subject close to my heart! 😄

@Blondcat Thank you! Glad I'm not going mad but good to know symptoms are similar to AF (to be honest I don't even think they're there-just overthinking!). Your advice to wait is sound as I don't want to start this whole process furiously testing early only to be disappointed!

@BambiOnIce80 Thank you too-your level of detail wasn't at all too much and was needed! I totally understand now and it all makes sense. I do have some early testing ones from when we began trying in 2015 only to stop due to illness but they're out of date so will replace.

It feels like 12dpo or post AF being due is the way to go... and I all of a sudden understand the abbreviation 2WW! Lightbulb moment

Thanks for the kind words everyone! I’m pretty sure it’s just AF since this is what happened my first cycle of TTC as well. No implantation, just a couple days of light spotting and then full blown AF, almost a week early. I was wondering if it could have been some sort of failed implantation triggering AF, but who knows?

I feel the sort of blah that means AF is around the corner. We still have houseguests until this evening. Then I plan on getting in my PJs and staying that way on Monday!

Anyone testing soon?

Hi all,

I’m 34 and a half but can I join you please?! Reading all the posts from people in their twenties makes me feel anxious! Trying for #1 with gorgeous fiancé, this is cycle 2 and I’m 4/5 dpo (got a positive opk but not temping so not sure exactly when I ovulated.)

It was good to read some of the chat about being kind of torn about wanting to get preggo. I’m in the same boat, we got engaged in June and ideally I would like to get married before having a sprog but I’m hearing that tick tock loud and clear and want to start trying. Don’t want the pressure of telling my parents we’re trying but they in turn are pressurising me about setting a date and can’t understand why we’re putting it off which is making me feel miserable and conflicted

Anyway, fingers crossed for everyone this month, who’s testing when?! I’m due 7thish Sep so aaaaages to go for me!

My period is due on the 4th/5th with a 28 day cycle (exact for last 3) and I only got a positive OPK yesterday, so Flo has for some reason adjusted my cycle to 32 and predicted period to the 8th. I do actually really hope that’s the case as otherwise I’ll have a luteal phase of 7-8 days which isn’t enough to implant 😰 I’m going to hold out on testing until the 6th at the earliest. Don’t want to waste a test & face the disappointment until I’m late.

@AstroKate you made me laugh too. I had to look up dpo, af, opk and dtd when I first started reading these threads as I hadn’t a clue what any of it meant! I still don’t really understand what a ‘luteal phase’ is either! I’m sure I looked that up too, but it’s flown straight out of my head 😂

I’m not testing this month as I was away during fw with friends and it will be some kind of miracle if we’ve managed to conceive. I had my blood test a few days ago and i’ve got a whopping great bruise!

Hi @Noodella18 good luck with your ttc journey. I’m sure I read somewhere that 34 is a great age to fall pregnant - try not to worry. I know what you mean about planning around ttc. I wasn’t sure about booking my holiday last year as I was worried about possibly being pregnant and having to deal with the plane journey & heat abroad. Needless to say it wasn’t an issue as we’ve not conceived yet. I really hope it happens soon for you, but I would definitely not put things off for ttc. I’m trying to take a more relaxed approach as I can be an anxious person anyway, especially if I fixate on something. It is tricky though!

@AstroKate here you go! Best things to dip are bread, obv but little boiled potatoes also good. DO NOT DIP BROCCOLI! It seems like a good idea at the time but the little flowers come off in the mix and it all just ends in tears. Keep your eyes peeled for fondue sets in charity shops they pop up quite often www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/wordofmouth/2017/feb/09/how-to-make-the-perfect-fondue
Welcome @Noodella18 you can be an honorary 35 year old (do you really want to??) It's my birthday tomorrow and DP just turned to me with a wicked grin and said "Oh, tomorrow you're almost 40!!"
Tomorrow I turn 39...... git.....
CD15 here and DP has come home full of a cold so he's been tucked up in bed with a hot toddy and not murdered for the aforementioned comment about my age. I think that's quite generous of me really. But did threaten to let the cat lick his eyeballs while he sleeps so he knows he isn't totally off the hook. So I suspect we're out this cycle and he's away in fw next month. Got my hopes up I was going to ovulate earlier than usual when I did an ICOPK Saturday that was one of the darkest I've ever had but that might have just been as we had been out and I hadn't had a wee in about 5 hours. This may also be the reason I've got another bloody UTI today. I am so fed up!!

Welcome @Noodella18 👋 Congratulations on your engagement! 💐

@Kescilly, did you survive your house guests?! I'd kill for a PJ day today, but it's unfortunately not a bank holiday where I am 😏

@Melamine, I'm the same as you - I much prefer AF to turn up than having the disappointment of a BFN on a FRER and then having to wait for her to turn up anyway 😒 I was reading that vit C is supposed to be helpful for increasing the luteal phase, if that's any help?

@PixieN, which bloods did you have done (if you don't mind me asking!)? Are you starting investigations? I hope it's good news, whatever they were for 🤞

@Chelonia, sounds like a UTI is the kind of early birthday present you could do without! 😣 I hope it clears up for tomorrow 🎂

@noodella18 welcome and goodluck for your ttc journey.

@chelonia sorry you got a uti that sucks especially in time for your birthday! Hope you and dh feel better soon.

This thread is so great. Thanks for the fondue and the fondon’t @chelonia! 😂 hope the UTI buggers off. Belated welcome @noodella18 - I replied to your last question but forgot to say hello! 🤦‍♀️

Ugh UTIs are the worst. I’m sorry, @chelonia.

Welcome @noodella18!

@BambiOnIce80 yes, it was a nice visit. I’ve felt energized today and weirdly look forward to organizing and cleaning after people have gone.

We’ve also done meal planning for this week as I want to start eating more healthfully. Feels good to start a new week! Still waiting for AF to fully show though.

Hope you feel better soon @Chelonia UTIs are vile and really don’t help when you’re ttc. I had a year of recurrent UTIs and felt miserable. Make sure you drink plenty of water and look after yourself

@BambiOnIce80 The blood test was to check my progesterone levels - hopefully everything’s o.k. My GP wants my DH to have an SA too. He’s not thrilled lol, but is willing to get tested if needed. How are you getting on? You were chasing up investigations, but further on in the process I think? x

I keep thinking of cheese fondues - really want one lol.

Also, chocolate fondue with strawberries 😋😁

@PixieN, fingers crossed for your progesterone results 🤞I was fully checked out 5 years ago in my previous relationship and was saddled with a diagnosis of primary unexplained infertility (aka "we don't know what's wrong with you; you just can't get pregnant 😕"). That relationship ended in divorce, so 5 years and a new DP later I'm about to start the whole process again - woo 😒 I'll be heading to the GP next month if no joy this cycle... really hoping acupuncture might turn out to be the secret fertility weapon that I've been lacking, but think I'd best be realistic and lower my expectations!

@Kescilly, I love a good meal plan because I absolutely love cooking and hate wasting food! It's proving a bit of a challenge this week because my kitchen is due to be ripped out 🙄 Quite looking forward to the Groupon stylee restaurant vouchers that we'll be using for the whole of next week though 😋 Not exactly healthy (especially as most of them include wine 🍷), but I'm hoping they'll counteract the stress of the kitchen upheaval 😉 Especially as fw is slap bang in the middle of the whole mess... Think I'm going to need more wine! 🥂

How's everybody's day's been? Anything to report? 🙂

Woo, first blazing pos OPK in aaages on a cheapo, i temp, & definitely ovulate, but never seem to get clear positive opks. Today is the day I get my house back to normal after a weekend of guests too!! Just need OH to finish work now 😉.
Positive vibes this month!

Happy DTD-ing @CNizzle! 😄

@Chelonia I think I actually drooled while reading that article... my days that does sound good! Forget chocolate fountains...cheese fountains are the way forwards. So sorry DP is not only unwell but now you have a UTI - that sucks and hoping for better things next month.

@BambiOnIce80 sorry to hear you had a bad run of it years ago: let's hope it's all about the right partner, the right time and this time is your time...

So many on here that are 35+ TTC does make me feel so much better. My DB (just 35) has 3 beautiful DC and my DH's DB and DS are also all done with DC's. Myself and DH are the older siblings so feeling very behind! As much as being unwell the last few years has sucked and put back our family plans, it has meant I haven't had the usual comments 'it'll be your turn soon' or 'you need to get a move on'... My very good friend of a similar age has been desperately trying for years with her DP and now trying IVF. Obviously it's not something she shares openly but she constantly gets comments like this from relatives. 35 + is now not that old to be starting a family! It seems to be a real generational thing with us and the baby boomers!

Sprinkling so much baby dust around....think a number of us are playing the waiting game now...tick tock Zzzzzz

Oh and hands up if you've already peed on a stick even though you ov'd practically five minutes ago as a little voice kept whispering in your ear that maybe your body just works more quickly than most....
🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏻‍♀️🙋🏻‍♀️

Thanks @AstroKate 💖 That's exactly what I was hoping when we started TTC in April, but now we're onto cycle 6 this month I've got that creeping feeling that it's got to be something not quite right with me 😔 That said, DP tried with his ex for 3 years (something else we have in common! 😂) with no luck too. He had a surprise for me last night too - seems I'm giving acupuncture a go this Thursday to bolster the TTC arsenal, he thought he'd do his bit by booking a GP appointment for the same day to see about arranging SA 😂 Had to explain to him that although I had the coil out in March, we strictly speaking haven't done 6 cycles until the end of September... he said he thinks the GP's a man so will count the 6 months his way 😂 I'll let him get on with it and wait and see if the GP will give him the SA or not.

Remind me whereabouts you are in your cycle? 🙂