Jizz in your eyes, raining out of your arse or just feeling boggin? Come and join the JSers for fun and frolics! And some of them drooling over Ian McShane, whoever he may be! It's Just Shagging 29!!

[lildottie]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

ROC - Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

The link to Part 28 is <a class="break-all" href="//www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2179455-Break-the-bed-marvel-at-the-ghost-sperm-ignore-the-fuss-about-avatar-pandas-and-whatever-you-do-dont-eat-the-jizz-Its-Just-Shagging-Part-28?" target="_blank">here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="//www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2186417-Just-Shagging-12th-Thread-for-graduated-viroids?pg=31" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="//www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

Happy shagging, shaggers!

You'll be proud of me viroids. Me and Mr La dtd first time in a month (and since whole mc process started) on a rickety uncomfortable sofa bed in his mums spare room. If I was t me I'd high give myself - reeeeeeeeespect!

Not gonna lie I'm now wondering whether anyone heard anything and a bit scared to leave the room...

Boo to bfn jelly boo!

chat any peeing yet?

*five not give. Doh!

Haha high five La!! Was it suitably awesome? There's something terribly naughty about parents house shagging!!

Sorry about the bfn Not out til the witch pulls up tho!

wow la that's pretty risky! I have a massive phobia about doing it when anyone's in the house lol!

I'm not too miffed about the BFN, I was expecting it. More down because I don't think AF is coming any time soon, I wish I at least had that indicator that I wasn't upduffed instead of wasting 20p test strips lol!

Not sure I'm even capable of stealth shagging anymore... it takes a series of cranes and pulleys to get into position nowadays...

Ha ha ha congratulations La! Something in that Scottish air perhaps.

Sorry Jelly. Must be so frustrating. Either way AF is screwing us!

Morning all!
La - sorry to hear about your day of shit yesterday - never easy being with 'other people' when your brain is full of angst...no-one ever knows what to say about MC and ends up either being flippant ('oh well - it happens all the time, and at least you know you can' - SIL with 3DCs 3 days after) or clamming up entirely because they don't know what to say or 'don't want to remind you of it'...Seriously? You think I'm actually thinking of anything else let alone engaging the distraction small talk that you're offering??

Hope the elephant comes out soon imagines big camp elephant...sniggers*...

Made the mistake of coming to Starbucks this WFH morning...Buggy count 6. Bah.

Huh - managed to post that bad boy accidentally...why can't you edit?

Ah I hate early morning Star Bucks, always a bit of a mistake!

I'm just getting bombarded with baby pictures of friends, also I (for some crazy reason) went on to the Ante Natal Clubs section of MN, big mistake lol!

Yup - don't know what I was thinking...and Jelly! STEP AWAY FROM THE PREGNANT LADIES...mind you, I was looking at the baby naming threads yesterday so I can't really talk...

Boggy count now 9 - smug level dangerously high...I'm outta here!

boggy count...Bother what the hell are you doing?!?!?

Ha! Freudian - buggies make me feel boggin!

No peeing this morning, I thought I'd take the 'ignorance is bliss' approach today. Still symptomless and witchless

Counting boggies and stealth shags...what a morning!

Sorry about the BFN Jelly, hope you'll get a clue what's going on soon.

Chat witch-and-sympotomless is a grand way to be. :)

I'll figure it out soon enough. I'm going away Thurs-Mon (Spain, here I come!) so when I get back I might see the doctor again, he gave me tabs last time to start my periods which didn't work, so I'll see if there's anything else he can prescribe me.

All I really want to know is if I am icing (if so I don't give a rats arse about AF) but I can't be dealing with OPK's every day!

Told Mr Fresh last night by presenting him with the bold as brass FRER, we were still tiffing a little but I'd just broken into tears whilst watching Sophia the First with DD so he thought I was completely bonkers and had to explain it somehow! He gave me a suitably knowing look, and a lovely big hug. Immediately wants to tell everyone of course (never gonna be a spy that man!) and only the "anything can happen in the first few weeks" line reined him in from telling DSS and calling his sister immediately. LOL

I adore you ker-aaazy bunch of viroids btw. Sending you all magical BFP dust!...xxxx

aw that's lovely Fresh, so happy it went ok :) Wishing you a happy healthy 8 months!

Hi everyone, can I join? I'm 29 and TTC first child since July 2014. Since realising I was not destined to become pregnant within 2 hours of stopping the pill I've decided to maybe get some support and advice! Hope you've space on the Fred for another, I've been reading it for some time!

Escaped to a Nero that's on the first floor...note to self - go where the boggy buggies can't! Much nicer, and even remembered that I have a free coffee courtesy of 02...everyone's a winner baby. Who's smug now, eh?

Fresh - so happy for you and Mr Fresh - gingers crossed for happy easy preggo-ness. We'll be needing the BFP dust - in the thick of JS-territory and both of us feeling ropey - fluey and coldy...sexy? Not so much...

Welcome Indigo :) You've come to the right mad place!

Bother, I have always preferred Costa to Starbucks and Nero!

Hi indigo come join the crayzaaayyys fun!

On yersel la!!! Just don't go breaking other peoples' beds!

jelli hope the doctor is helpful, and chat you have AMAZING strength not poasing! Gingers crossed!

Hi Indigo! - welcome to the Fred of bonking bonkers-ness. Bit odd that this lot know more about my sex life, inner workings and hormonal crazy thoughts that anyone I actually 'know'...but it makes SUCH a difference to be able to share it with a bunch of nutters lovelies who 'get it'. Welcome! Where you at with your cycle?

Jelly - me too, but for some reason Nerd (not a typo - check out their typeface - it deffo says NERD!) and Starbucks seem to have a monopoly round here.

x

When I look out my window at work, in my view is a Pret, a Costa, 3 Star Bucks, 2 Eat's and a random little independent coffee shop! Spoilt for choice! I still get the gross vending machine free coffee though lol!

Hey everybody, for those who don't know me I graduated last year and have graduated the grad thread with my 8 week baby boy!

I am a long time lurker and wishing you all the best of luck with your jshagging and I am rooting for you all!