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Original poster

TTC after a miscarriage - Jingle Beans, Jingle Beans, Beanies all the way!!

743 replies

jinglediddle · 06/12/2005 14:37

A fresh new thread.

Lets hope this one is as successful as the last and we can help as many people as we can to come to terms with what has happened to them.
Lets spread some christmas support for everyone.

xxx

OP posts:
XmasAngelCrimboKat · 07/12/2005 12:27

Hear hear!

going4potty · 07/12/2005 12:27

I actually work in a womens hospital, so you cant walk 2 yards without seeing a pregnant belly. Its not that bad though, i think its just still very raw at mo. They were actually very supportive at epau and didnt make me feel pathetic etc. The only thingi would say is that the miscarraige leaflets were very paltry and seemed to be aimed at later miscarriages. AS though early ones are not quite such a big deal.

carlychristmas · 07/12/2005 12:28

XACK how strange! My friend's guide was an indian girl with really long black hair, thats the only reason i brought her up beacause i thought he had taken a girl into his room!! He had a gf at the time and i thought he was being naughty So you can imagine the shock i had when i went in there and there was no one there!!!!

XmasAngelCrimboKat · 07/12/2005 12:28

High about time it was changed. especially the poor, poor women that stillbirth. Still put on a maternity ward

Atomicstockinghanger · 07/12/2005 12:29

But you know early ones are just as big a deal. Don't think they aren't for one minute. I agree though, the advice I was given (what little theres was) was deffo aimed at more advanced MCs

XmasAngelCrimboKat · 07/12/2005 12:30

Lol Carly.
G4P- we were so lucky, even though quite early on (was 11 wks when they told me it had died but actually died at 7 wks) they were wonderful.

going4potty · 07/12/2005 12:30

god, i didnt realise mums having a stillbirth were put on maternity units! That is very insensitive. So awful>

XmasAngelCrimboKat · 07/12/2005 12:32

Some hospitals are great some arent. When I had my eldest they put a mum in with us and she'd had one. I hope it's more rare these days.

Atomicstockinghanger · 07/12/2005 12:34

Unfortunately Xack i don't think it is. What with budgets and short staffing and all that. I don't think its a case of staff being insensitive, more lack of resourses. It is higher up that need the nudge. they need to be aware of the destress this causes

XmasAngelCrimboKat · 07/12/2005 12:34

Listen my lovelies, been great nattering but i really have to clean before dp gets back and thinks all I've done is goss all day
Be back a little later all. Take care xxx
G4P- Best of luck hun, thinking of you x

going4potty · 07/12/2005 12:34

Well, i feel i can leave the house without weeping now. So i will, christmas shopping still not done, with everything thats been going on. So have a good afternoon, speak to you later. bye

Atomicstockinghanger · 07/12/2005 12:34

See ya Xack xxxxxxx

Atomicstockinghanger · 07/12/2005 12:35

G4P you look after yourself and don't be doing too much. Take care hunni xxxxx

carlychristmas · 07/12/2005 12:36

G4P i really feel for you hun stay strong xx

Atomicstockinghanger · 07/12/2005 12:38

Well, I'm off to get organised. Got to go into Canterbury soon to collect a couple of pressies I've reserved at Argos. Will be back later. Take care everyone and don't do anything i wouldn't (which doesn't leave much!!)

xxxxxxxxxxx

FirstSaintNikkilass · 07/12/2005 12:50

I was v lucky in that I went via A&E staff were wonderful and I am on a ward and they made every effort to keep me away of pg women. I know others who have gone to the alternate hopsital in my area and received terrible care, and its not on.

Got my scan first thing tomo so got to hold in the pee....I hate that part it cripples me. I will just have to nip to the ward then go for my scan and then back to the ward.

Take care of yourself G4P. x

slinksanta · 07/12/2005 13:05

Hi everyone,
just wanted to say that it's true where they put mothers miscarrying or having stillborn, i was just about to be put on the postnatal ward after i lost my daughter- i had to argue with them to let me home as they wanted me on iv antibiotics for another 2 days, i said no and eventually they had no choice but to let me take tablets instead and go home.
i think some hospitals have bereavement rooms but not many.

mumsXMASwish · 07/12/2005 13:16

I'm back from lunch and my you lot have been gossiping. We've just had a letter from the mortgage advisor saying the mortgage has been accepted so all we have to do now is carry out the searches and the house is ours. They've said it will get done by xmas.

FirstSaintNikkilass · 07/12/2005 13:19

Hi Slinkn how are you,

Mums thats great news what a xmas time you are having

mumsXMASwish · 07/12/2005 13:21

Its about time everything started to go good. Lol

Last year, i'd had my mc (oct), got a really crappy neighbour downstairs, out of a job (boss was a git about the mc) and my (well mum's) dog died. So It's like all my xmas' have come at once.

FirstSaintNikkilass · 07/12/2005 13:23

well if it comes in 3's maybe a lotto win

mygarland · 07/12/2005 13:25

i really think someting needs to be done about putting epu and women mc'ing/having/had stillbirth and post natal loses so close to ante natal and around live babies. when i had dd1 there was a lady who'd had a prem and she was no a ward with 3 babies waking her up thru the night - couldn't've been good for her and her baby lived so i can't imagine other ladies' nightmares. our epu was literally opposite the ante and they walked me thru the waiting/exam rooms to get me a scan, the ladies working there weren't particularly nice either

mumsXMASwish · 07/12/2005 13:31

I know what you mean, when I was in shrews they were pure evil gits.

I'd booked int he night before the D&C and the nurse was telling me stuff I had to eat to help the baby. I got annoyed but instead of shouting at her or at least telling her she was being stupid, I cried. Then I got up and went out for a fag (I started smoking again as soon as I heard about the mc) she came out a couple of minutes later with a nurse friend and I could hear her muttering about how some women don't know how to help they're child get through anything.!!!

i wanted to kill her there and then but luckily DF stopped me. lol

mygarland · 07/12/2005 13:33

think i would've ended up punching her i'm v impatient and it doesn't take much to get me wound up for smacking insensitive ppl!

FirstSaintNikkilass · 07/12/2005 13:39

Here here! me too...

on a different subject but still on insensitive went shopping last night and nice lady on till been working there 4 days, supervisor picks her up on an error she had done in front of us shoppers and she came with a colleague to it was like she had been ganged up on..... only on my way out supervisor was gossiping to other staff about her error.....thats just out of order I felt for the lady....that made me

Sorry to digress.....back to the prev. point, you would have thought these womens hospitals would have realised something by now considering how many people they must see day in day out.