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Chanel No5 The Advert: Part III (all welcome)

122 replies

SlubberdegullionMitSpeck · 28/12/2008 20:35

Previously on Chanel No 5 The Advert: Part II

(voice over + a nice spot of Bach cello playing in the back ground)

Nicole is seen mournfully skating alone, in central park, its 3am, she only has a large minder for company, he is smoking

"She was still the most famous woman in the world"

"The memories of that night had never left her"

Nicole slips (daintilly), her muff skids across the ice, a squirrel nicks in....she gives chase, and who should come out from behind a tree with squirrel in his arms...

it's him

she gasps

he smiles

"I love to skate"

the squirrel has the chanel no 5 necklace thingmy in its teeth

The squirrel is wild,. it is friendly though. it is soothed in sexy guys warm capable hands.

Sexy eyes 'accidentally' drops the squirrel (still with muff) due to lusty surprise at seeing Nicole and the minder has given chase.

She unlaces her skates (a bit of old-fashioned freudian subtext)
and get in a tangle and he grabs her hand (chicken feet fingers)

He puts a warm capable hand over her chicken feet to put an end to the cackhandedness. Then there is a money shot look into each others eyes.

sexy eyes speaks (in Russian accent)
"there is something I must show you"

Next scene at the Guggenheim Museum. There is an exhibition about The Russian Tsars. Nicole has intrigued face on. Sexy Eyes is full of grim determination.

They walk hand in hand, looking at the oil paintings of the Russian Royals and then they stop.

There is a picture of Tsar Nicholas II, in his younger days and (Bach goes into minor key) He is the very spit of Sexy Eyes

Nicole: but?
Sexy eyes: yes, I am the king of Russia. I also have to hide myself away from the world

Another money shot deep look. they kiss

Nicole: but can we
SE: No never.......

Final scene

They leave the museum, Nicole steps into a hot air balloon. the squirrel is there aswell (with muff). As the ballon rises their clasping hands slip apart.......

Camera pans up to shot of balloon with Chanel No5 logo on.

OP posts:
SlubberdegullionMitSpeck · 28/12/2008 22:40

You know THIS IS BLOODY GOOD

I think we should stick to one "I am a....." per episode, and I am a scrubber is particularly fabulous

Maybe we need to leave manly sweeping until next year

ALTHOUGH

she could be looking in toy shop window at chanel and squirrel lego dioramas

THEN she drops her muff
(tumbly muff/lock pastiche)

she picks it up

looks back in window to see

IT'S ONLY HIS REFLECTION STARING BACK AT HER ISN'T IT.

THE END

[lush cliff hanger]

OP posts:
RustyBear · 28/12/2008 22:42

Could she be wearing this in her tumbling curls?

SlubberdegullionMitSpeck · 28/12/2008 22:44

that's a pretty thing Rusty

OP posts:
DoubleBluff · 28/12/2008 22:44

Rusty she would look fablusss in it!!

ToysAreLikeDogs · 28/12/2008 22:47

oooh that is lovely

What about this?

SlubberdegullionMitSpeck · 28/12/2008 22:49

damn you baldy. damn you.

Yes we haven't really fleshed out her wardrobe or the soundrack either.

OP posts:
Hassled · 28/12/2008 22:55

"She" by Charles Aznavour.

I'm struggling with a Luge related song, tbh

We have the Luge section costume sorted:
"Up to "I love to luge" line Nicole must be properly buttoned up, completely neat and tidy.

Upon uttering 'I love to..', her hair will suddenly become a tousled mass, clothes practically fall off and wardrobe to apply excess spittle to her lips."

And I'm sure someone said something about a Chanel logo diamante type luge suit but I may ahve made that up.

Hassled · 28/12/2008 22:56

The more you type the word luge the weirder it looks.

ToysAreLikeDogs · 28/12/2008 22:57

har har har

I google Lugewear and it wondered if I meant Loungewear

at getting you Slubber

SlubberdegullionMitSpeck · 28/12/2008 23:00

yes in the luge set piece she needs to be in a svavorski (sp wrong) encrusted white lycra suit possibly with a hem of matching muff fur.

OP posts:
SlubberdegullionMitSpeck · 28/12/2008 23:04

Isn't there a "down down" song by slade or someone

It's not very glamorous tho.

Perhaps a solo organ piece full of grandeur and haunting whistfulness

WTF am I going on about? I need to go to bed.

OP posts:
ToysAreLikeDogs · 28/12/2008 23:08

yy bed missy we can continue tomorrow mate

SlubberdegullionMitSpeck · 28/12/2008 23:09

indeed

night all.

This was fun

OP posts:
RustyBear · 28/12/2008 23:09

Maybe Nicole's downfall could come about because she is persuaded to smuggle Chanel No 5 across the Russian border on her luge - then you could call the thing 'Mule on luge'

ToysAreLikeDogs · 28/12/2008 23:10

Rusty if I had a pedestal I would hoist you up onto it

That is genius

WilfSellHasABigRaddledCock · 28/12/2008 23:11

Boys/Toys! Have finally read email.

Have replied. Thanks.

ToysAreLikeDogs · 28/12/2008 23:13

Bless you Wilf

TheYearOfTheCat · 28/12/2008 23:21

Rusty - ROFL!

RustyBear · 29/12/2008 22:07

So what about this music & costumes then?

BALD · 29/12/2008 22:09

Ooop Rusty I had forgotten about this

[slaps forehead]

OK I've got ten minutes

Are we going to go for a 'period' feel?

(I don't mean that she should be seen wearing her period pants obv)

RustyBear · 29/12/2008 22:20

Well, it can't be too period -I don't think Health and Safety would approve of crinolines on a luge.
I suppose she could wear one of those Victorian bathing dresses

BALD · 29/12/2008 22:25

hmmm red to matchy match her hair

green to pick up her eyes

decisions decisions

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