Fellatio's Poncetastic Christmas Thread 2011 is.....

[FellatioNelson]

open for business. Knock yerselves out.

I am in this year since I have been lurking round the Christmas topic since August

Any poncetastic ideas are greatly welcome

I think we've broken Pinterest! I keep getting error messages.

I blame Squitch you've over loaded it

Happy Poncetastic Christmas to you all - discovered last year's thread in July time when I stating having Christmas thoughts, have been loving the new thread these past few days - I feel it will be key to ensuring the fubble home is full of Poncetasticness this year!

I thought it was just me suffering from the Pinterest woes this morning - happy we've all helped to break it!

Seeing as I can't pin things, was "researching" for some lovely things and have come across the most un-poncetastic item ever (apart from tinsel!)

Have a look here

Broken Pinterest here too. I suspect it's because they are doing the revamp thing that they have been threatening to do for the last week or so. I hope the changes include being able to reorder your pins on a board although I suspect not. Drives me mad that you can't do that.

I sort of want that Fubble - so bad it's nearly gone all the way back round again. I must confess that i do put out Christmas hand towels in the bathroom, but they are really just plain white ones that i sewed a ribbon across the top and a felt holly leaf.

Pinterest kept doing that to me yesterday (and is still doing it today) i suspect it's the 'changes' as well. I will point out though that i was trying to pin something yesterday and it kept coming up with the error message, so being the relaxed person i am I just kept repinning it for oh, about10 minutes. It may have said it didnt work but last night I had to delete about 500 of the same pin! - be warned (actually reading that, perhaps it is me that's broken it )

Amazed that you can get off your chair after seven courses, Minerva!

Fubble, that loo seat cover and mat are hilarious! Although if it encourages reluctant DC to use the loo it might just be worth it, accompanied by The Snowman loo roll. To be fair there's a limit to how much you can poncify a loo.

I am wondering about making a Christmas tree skirt to replace the totally unponcy one I have already. I am thinking of gold velvet and brocade or organza, with some sort of beading or other embellishment. Am I mad? Our cat likes to furkle around under the tree skirt, thinks there must be small furry things living underneath, will it get totally trashed?

Hahahahahahaha fubble. I'd be tempted to buy that unponcey bathroom set for the sheer glee of people's expressions at my suitably poncey drinks party.

Loving the thread - havent read the whole thread yet but will catch up over time.

My poncetastic claim to fame is growing our own turkeys two years ago - thinking about doing the same this year (although the last time we got filmed doing it for a bbc programme - surely that gives me some poncetastic points?)

Liked the gingerbread man string for the bannisters earlier in the thread. Might have to give that a go, and the plums are picked for plum vodka (although the recipe does come from the asda magazine so maybe lose some points for that).

Oh my goodness. I'm having a ponce crisis.

I haven't got a colour scheme yet

Sorry ladies, I have let you down. Will report back when I've given myself a good talking to and chosen some colours.

GIrly, who says I can actually stand up after 7 courses? Trouble is - this year I htink we have about 13 adults and 3 toddlers to cater for... It will require military precision methinks.

OK, I will not breed my own turkeys. That is a boundary I will not cross.

Minervaitalica Can I come to you for Christmas? I'm drooling at the thought of that cheeseboard. Yum.

I'm beginning to doubt my own ponciness now. I've had the same colour theme for the last few years. I didn't realise people changed every year!

Can I join? I can do poncey (I think).

I make my own mincemeat, the cake and pudding and saltdough decorations. But I want to do more this year as I have bought lots of Christmassy fabric and intend to make stockings and a small quilt.

But I am willing to listen and learn from all you better ponces.

It's OK Starshaped, you don't have to change your colour theme every year, only if it clashes with new decor!

I make mincemeat, and sugar crust pastry for mincepies, proper vanilla ice-cream made with egg custard and double cream; also chestnut stuffing and carrot and parsnip puree which are frozen in advance for Christmas lunch. I cook a gammon joint which we have hot on Christmas eve, and it provides cold meat after that.

I made a throw for the sofa last Christmas, and usually make a floral centrepiece for the dinner table, but shopping for fresh flowers was thwarted by the snow last year.

I try to make some sort of wreath or similar for by the front door, and customise bought decorations. If you buy a plain faux wreath or garland, you can decorate them as you wish and simply remove the decs and replace with different the next year. I have a box of inexpensive baubles and stuff for outside decs, doesn't matter if they get snowed on as we have no porch. For inside wreaths and garlands, you can use much posher decs and people will think you have spent a fortune.

Well, the raspberry gin has been made and the dried fruits for the Christmas cake are sucking up the brandy as we speak. It seemed very odd to be preparing the fruit this afternoon while it was 23 degrees outside!

And, I got a Cox & Cox brochure through the post today. I have never had one before and I know I haven't requested one from the website. How have they found about my Christmas ponceyness?

The girls and me are getting together one night the week before Christmas for mulled wine, mince pie and wreath making. Mine will be spectacularly shite. I have NO floristry skills.

I was planning red and green, but think I may be doing white. And blue. But mostly, white, white, white :)

Oh, and I remember someone mentioning chilli jam upthread. Lorraine Pascal made it on her programme on Monday night and it looked firm not runny. The recipe isn't on BBC.co.uk/food, but the episode is on Iplayer.

conkertree am using the Asda recipe too. Will let you know how i get on.
Am miles behind in the ponciness stakes, but enjoying reading what everyone else is up to.

I was given some sloes today, so I'm going to do sloe gin rather than the planned blackberry vodka.

I also wanted to do my Christmas cake this weekend but now it's nice weather DH wants to go camping. I daren't tell him that I want to do Christmas preparations in September, so the cake will have to wait another week.

I just saw this recipe for chilli jam on BBC good food. No pectin, but says if you cook it for long enough it goes thick.

Oh that's beautiful CheerfulYank - that's sort of my dream, but i'm more shabby than chic (isn't Christmas ironic really, if I didnt have a DD it wouldn't be nearly as much fun, but WAY more tidy stylish)

I have my xmas cake in the oven, though I don't know what its going to be like as I left the fruit to macerate in brandy for 3 days and then licked the bowl clean afterwards actually feel quite light headed................

Sounds delicious PrincessRoyal.

I could actually have just eaten it like that

Pru, Sat is actually October so a fine time to be Christmas planning.

Am watching with interest. Am thinking a few things through but no purchases as yet. Ikea'[s Christmas department is surprisingly traditional. I got lots of lovely decorations there but they sell out very quickly.

Did anyone have any luck with the Cox and Cox 25% off code~? I have the catalogue from about 3 weeks ago but sadly no discount for me.....