Due April 2009: Episode 19 - We had sex in July!! The curse of the slummy mummy!!

[SmuttyNuttyTaff]

so the orgy thread begins

For Nutty. Not lots of sex, but lots of McSteamy hotness - you get to watch him do his dirty smile a few times

And make a beautiful arrangement of beautiful but extremely pollen-y grasses and spring flowers in her room!

Well have a cat, but he stays out of that room for the most part...He's liking the nursery currently... I don't want her miserable or getting really ill... (I just want to know how much laziness I can get away with)

will someone please tell me to get off my ass and DO something?? my kitchen is a pit, the rest of the house isn't much better. i just want to sit here and veg all day!

Nah - cat will probably make her a bit sneezy, that's all! I'm sure he'll go and curl up on the bed for a while if you encourage him....or possibly if you give him strict instructions not to go in there, that usually works better with cats!

purplemonkey, I can't tell you to do anything. I'm still in my jammies, DH is due home any minute & all I've managed to do so far is feed myself

Purple - STAY RIGHT THERE!!! Vegging is what pregnant women are for! Someone has to do it.

Not to make you guys jealous...but I have an ex who looks rather like McSteamy only he was much bigger/broader (6'3")... the um 'fun' we had was great.

I have been a bit active, but only cos of HV visit! House is clean (no mould or cobwebs), but messy enough to look like haven't made too much effort (casually strewn NCT magazines, batch of soup cooling in kitchen....). Am now ready to be judged.

Will just pop outside for a fag first though.......

Oh Purple just veg. I wish I could veg more but I'm feeling very obligated...

Bleu -STOP BEING SO DAMN NICE!!! get a bit evil on her ass fgs, the woman is an insensitive cow.

you do not want to be in the spd club either.

Springy - thank you!!!!! yummy

Purple - stay where you are the house will still be there tommorow

What's a HV visit?

i'm pretty much a slattern in my non-pregnant state but at least i usually get the kitchen tidied every day. right now...bah.

actually DH still gets hot dinners on the table when he gets in so there's THAT at least. the trouble is that the mess doesn't bother him and he'll just leave it. I'd LIKE to have a tidier house right now but between the SPD and just being generally knackered i just can't manage it.

Health visitor.

Health Visitor HV usually comes over post baby if you have hospital birth

Has anyone got a nice quiche recipe that freezes well?

Sorry, bit off topic.

Willies, again.

Ju, I like the NCT magazine touch - I had a MW phone once to say she'd be round in 10 minutes to take some blood because my other sample had been lost or something. The flat was a total tip, so I threw a load of stuff in the bedroom & pulled out my What To Expect book & a couple of the dullest, most pretentious literature books I could find off the bookshelf & casually scattered them around the room & sat with my essay folder & a pen next to me on the sofa like she'd disturbed my work, not my MNing.

We're a cunning breed.

Oh! Really? Hmmm and they judge your house? What happens if it's not clean?

My vicarious experience of health visitors is that they come round and criticise your child-rearing ability, hence the panicked tidying. I'm sure they're actually all lovely really.

hmmm As if one needs someone else criticising one's child rearing abilities...

I really hope they don't really judge your house. If so, heaven help me if she goes upstairs. The NSPCC will be round to have me sectioned (both caesarean and Mental Health Act), and take the LO away STAT!

Mainly, I just hate strangers coming round as I know I'm a complete slattern.

Not actually sure you can draw a direct correlation between child-rearing ability and cleanliness though. Godliness, apparently, but not child-rearing.

they dont judge your house, they expect it to be a bit of a mess post baby tbh, especially on the first visit

Does the time of the day that your baby seem most active relate to the time you're likely to give birth? If so watch out for a post in the mid afternoon from me saying I've gone into the hospital

I got a bike for my 3rd birthday & managed to fall off it & twist my arm. The whole thing was caught on camera (& still makes my parents to watch it now!) & totally indisputable. I had to go to hospital to get it checked because it wouldn't stop hurting, so the HV was sent round as a matter of protocol. She apparently gave my mum such a nasty lecture about how she'd be keeping an eye out for any further injuries I may sustain & to be careful, etc. She was basically implying that my mum had been beating me or something - just because I fell off my bike once, aged 3! I'd not even been to hospital for anything else before! I think some of them just enjoy making you feel like a bad parent for the hell of it.