Sad news, I’m afraid. We had our 9-week ultrasound yesterday and no heart beat could be found. It should have been totally clear, as we’d already seen it two weeks ago and the fetus had continued to grow exactly as it should have. However, they searched from every possible angle and got in the most senior sonographer for a second opinion and, sadly, the conclusion was the same. The pregnancy has simply stopped. They think it must have happened in the last couple of days.
Naturally we’re devastated, partly as we’d felt so optimistic. Our embryos were rigorously screened, as was our 27-year old egg donor. My womb and blood tests have been perfect throughout, and I still have no bleeding or cramps. But then we knew that, as with any pregnancy, it’d probably take more than one go and sometimes there just isn’t an explanation: what happens will happen anyway.
I’m scheduled to have a surgical evacuation under general anaesthesia first thing on Monday. Fortunately, that’ll also help my body reset quickly. At my age, time is of the essence. The one thing that makes our loss now even bearable is knowing we’ve got further embryos to transfer and can try again in a couple of months. So, hopefully, I’ll be back again soon.
In the meantime, I wish you the very best of luck with your pregnancies. I’m massively grateful for everyone’s support, fun and encouragement. As a little old woman with a twinkle in her eye said to me the other day, “every baby’s a miracle.” So try not to worry; in truth, it won’t make any difference anyway. And, even if you don’t always feel great, just feel lucky and enjoy it.
May every one of you and your babies stay healthy, happy and much-loved, all the way. With very best wishes, Leotwist xxx